"Ah still love Vista Baby....."
She laughed and said, "No, this is an old-fashioned watch! You have to look at it!"
He said "There was a sail."
But he was 0K.
Told him to use both and heβd probably find him a lot quicker.
I was so concerned I jumped up and ran over to him...
Earlier that day my friend and I who were really into mountain biking had been using really sticky letters to put our names on our bikes. We were working near the general area of the BBQ.
Apparently I had dropped one...
Stuck to the bottom of my dads foot was the letter B....
A legendary dad joke from a legendary dad.
Heβll come around eventually.
Cop: "Do you think I am stupid ? I can see you through the window."
Mee: "You are not coming in."
Cop: "I don't want to come in. I want you to step out of your car !!"
"That's M'Shell on my back!"
The first guy answers, "That's easy, we'll catch him fast because he only has one eye!"
The policeman says, "Well...uh...that's because the picture I showed is his side profile."
Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture for 5 seconds at the second guy and asks him, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"
The second guy smiles, flips his hair and says, "Ha! He'd be too easy to catch because he only has one ear!"
The policeman angrily responds, "What's the matter with you two?!!? Of course only one eye and one ear are showing because it's a picture of his side profile! Is that the best answer you can come up with?"
Extremely frustrated at this point, he shows the picture to the third guy and in a very testy voice asks, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?
He quickly adds, "Think hard before giving me a stupid answer."
The third guy looks at the picture intently for a moment and says, "The suspect wears contact lenses."
The policeman is surprised and speechless because he really doesn't know himself if the suspect wears contacts or not.
"Well, that's an interesting answer. Wait here for a few minutes while I check his file and I'll get back to you on that."
He leaves the room and goes to his office, checks the suspect's file on his computer and comes back with a beaming smile on his face.
"Wow! I can't believe it. It's TRUE! The suspect does, in fact, wear contact lenses. Good work! How were you able to make such an astute observation?"
"That's easy..." the third guy replied. "He can't wear regular glasses because he only has one eye and one ear."
"Sir, you gave me an extra." That's a freebie.
58
Whenever he says "I'm ready to retire," his boss puts him right back to work on another car.
"A TOE TRUCK!!??"
"The opposite of right!"
Jack and the beans talk!
Heβs still making fun of me...
It's pastor bedtime
"Country!"
Called it a day.
"You know, one would have been enough."
He said, "No the steaks are too high."
But thatβs his story, and heβs sticking to it.
Lukewarm
Supplies!
The next day the newspaper read "Arti chokes two for $5 at the supermarket"
He tries them on for sighs.
"So , how long have you been an Instructor?"
Now he can even look at himself in the mirror.
He said it was because I committed a moving violation.
He told me it was the only job he could see himself doing
58
"You know, 1 would have been fine"
