I asked my doctor if he could refer me to a specialist about my addiction to board games. Draughts, Snakes and ladders, Scrabble....
He asked "Any Chess?"
So I said no, I'd rather go private.
My dad saw an ad for game with heavily armed animals. He asked me what they gave the naked mole rats.
I told him stealth gear and a go bag. He is an exposed double agent.
What did the dad say when he cooked a big game dinner for his mostly vegan friends?
I’m sorry, looks like I’ve made a huge moose steak
I was watching my son play a Zelda game and I told him it's more effective to lose your health during the summer and winter seasons. He looked at me all confused and asked why? I told him it's because...
that way you won't take any fall damage.
My grandpa used to have a job keeping score at baseball games. Every time someone scored a run, he'd whack up a mark on a chalkboard.
Nowadays you'd call him a scorekeeper, but back then he was a tally whacker.
I asked a guy in a pub if he wanted a game of darts. He said “OK, nearest the bull starts”. ...
He went “Baaa”
I went “Moooo”
He said ok you start.
My sister asked me to keep my nephew from playing games on his tablet all night. I suggested he builds a fort with his cousin.
He instantly replied, “but mom said I couldn’t play Fort Night”
(He’s gonna be a great dad some day)
We were moving some boxes to my son's car, when he dropped a Scrabble game and the letters scattered everywhere. So I asked him...
"What's the word on the street?!"
My dad was an organ player at basketball games, one time something got stuck on the organ and it made such a loud sound he sadly died.
The death was listed as “organ failure”
Why did Loki throw a temper tantrum when he couldn't find his brother during a game of hide and seek?
Because he was a Thor loser
My stupid cousin thinks he's collected one of every board game ever made.
That idiot doesn't have a Clue.
I asked a french man if he plays computer games
Asked my son if he and his friends, were playing the latest Virtual Reality game.
If Game of Thrones was written by M. Night Shyamalan, what would he have called the White Walkers?
I bet my son $10 I could predict the score of the Pats-Rams game tonight before it starts, and he said you’re on.
My father-in-law knows how much I love puns, so he gave me this game for Christmas
One day, my buddy and I were playing a game of cribbage and I was far ahead of him. He told me “Man, you are on fire.”
I shouted back at him “Then put me out already!”
Invited my dad to play video games with me. He puts the controller up to the side of his head.
"What are you doing, dad?"
"I'm playing it by ear"
Which circle of he'll has the best party games?
What game did Thanos's dad play with him when he was a baby?
His names was “German potato” written in German. After this he left the game and never returned.
My son came to me really happy and told me that he was rich in his favorite game and I just couldn't stop crying
Doesn't he like to be called Stephen?
My son told me that he is into this new game fortnite.
Well that's good, you usually get bored of a game after 2 weeks.
My gambling addicted brother has been missing for a while. Last we saw him he lost his life savings in a game of poker.
My friend thinks he so smart cause he owns every board game.
But he doesn't have a Clue.
What does a russian do when he is winning in soccer and there is 5 minutes left in the game?
I asked my son what he wanted to eat at the NBA all star game
Yesterday, my son thought he could challenge me to a game of basketball. It goes without saying,
What did the man say when he got stuck in a game show?
Help! My life is in Jeopardy!
What would the director of British Airways say if he was announcing a baseball game?
The pitcher winds up... and Heathrows the ball!
What did the chef do when he was told that he was obstructing the poker game?
I was at a soccer game, when a fan jumped onto the field dressed as a player. He was chased off.
Now here’s the real kicker.
I asked my dad if he had ever played the game Amnesia.
He said "I can't remember".
What did the tropical bird say when he caught his friend cheating in a board game?
Darth Vader likes to play a game where he stands as still as possible for as long as he can.
He calls it the Anakin challenge.
So I was watching the CFB National Championship game with my dad and he hit me with this.
Talking about the size of the screen at Dallas Stadium
Me: I still can't get over it.
Him: Well that's because its too tall.
My dad doesn't offer many "dad jokes" so this was a special moment.
My Dad came home from shopping and said he had bought a new exciting board game for the family to play at Christmas!
[Game of Thrones reference] What does Daenerys Targaryen call King Robert Baratheon when he's going out to eat ramen?
He always knows the score to the big game
Tonight after the Iron Bowl, he said, "I knew the score before it began!"
I asked him how he could make a claim like that and he said, "It's always 0 to 0 at the beginning."
I'm not a dad but my friend at work is and he just dropped this one when I asked him to start playing a new online game with me....
Sorry, but I'm mono-game-ous.
I asked a French man if he played video games
I asked a frenchman if he played video games.
I asked a French man if he played video games, he said wii
I asked a Frenchman if he likes playing video games...
I asked a French man if he plays video games...
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