What's the difference between a "male" and a "female"?
TIL Older forms of English kept Latin’s gender-specific suffixes -tor and -trix; tor is for men and trix is for women. So a male pilot is an aviator, a female pilot is an aviatrix. A male fighter is a gladiator, a female fighter is a gladiatrix.
This contrasts with the modern system, where tor is for both men and women, and trix are for kids.
A suspected Covid-19 male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose.
A young student female nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath.
"Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"
Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet."
He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?"
Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and
pulls back the covers.
She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other.
She looks very closely and says, "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine."
The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly,
"Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very, very, closely:
"Are - my - test - results - back?"
"Hey honey did you hear they came out with a male birth control cream?"
It's being marketed as Son-block.
What do male genitals and conspiracy theories have in common?
What do you call a narcoleptic male cow who likes to smash things up?
Male anatomy isn’t the same as female anatomy.
In fact, there’s a Vas Deferens.
Raising chickens at home, just asked my Dad "how do I tell if a baby chick is male or female?"
Dad: "look for the pecker"
The local humane society is giving away male geese for free.
I might go take a gander.
When a male honey bee climaxes during sex, his testicles explode and he dies
Gives a new meaning to "busting a nut"
My friend does the perfect imitation of the offspring of a male donkey and a female horse.
It's a perfect em-mule-ation.
How can you tell if a bird is male?
By looking at it’s pecker.
Imagine a boat made of potatoes shaped like male genitalia... It's a dictatorship
If a adolescent male is a Teen-ager then
A adult male is a Man-ager
The male antenna married the female antenna.
The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was terrific!
What do you call your elderly male relative who’s always taking pictures?
My wife got mad at me for insisting we hire a male masseuse.
She called me a massage-anist.
How do you tell a male chromosome from a female chromosome?
You pull down its "genes"
What do you call Ancient Egyptian males that worship the sun?
(Joke derived from u/praetorsolaris)
Where does the food go at the all male soup kitchen?
My male friend with two red headed parents got turned into a cookie today
Not much has changed though, he’s still a ginger-bred man.
How do you know if an ant is a male or a female?
They're all females, otherwise they'd be uncles
The discovery of taste buds in the male reproductive organs
gives a new meaning to the word tasty-cles
My male offspring gave me homemade whisky!
Female squirrels like to stay close to the males...
... but only 'cause their nuts.
How do you know if a tiger is male or female?
Throw a rock at it. If he runs it's a male. If she runs it's a female.
It’s weird that male deer have antlers...
You’d think they’d have Unclers.
What did the professor say when his students wanted to hunt male deer before the first day of class?
"Don't get the hart before the course!"
What do you call a male ant?
What do you call a Male deer with only 1 antler?
As I am checking out, I read his nametag and I ask the large black male cashier, "did your momma really name you Amanda?"
I was very surprised that he responded : "Yes, because I am A Man!"
To determine the gender of a parrot you have to stick your finger in the cage. If he bites you, he's a male...
If she bites you, she's a female.
Which kind of dinosaur is attracted to both male and female dinosaurs?
What do you call male oysters?
Boysters. What do you call bodybuilding oysters?
Hoisters. What do you call oyster pirates?
Ahoysters. What do you call oyster nuns?
Cloisters. What do you call oysters that live under water?
Moisters. What do you call shy oysters?
Coysters. What do you call working class oysters?
Employsters. What do you call oysters with an evil plan?
Ploysters. What do you call singing oysters?
I should stop before this gets worseter.
As an only child who is male, I should have been named...
I'm going to market a new organic fertilizer made from 100% male chicken manure. It will be sold as
I identify as a male goose
I guess that makes me transgander.
Iron man is technically a Fe-male
For male pornstars, its always a hard day at work.
The devil is depicted as male, because he is evil with a d...
What do young male Spanish cows call each other?
Why did the female mushroom ask the male mushroom on a date?
He seemed like a fun guy.
Two male FBI agents went to dinner and a movie.
It was a federal man date.
If you buy a male prostitute in America, you are spending USD to get a US D
What do you call a male doctor who specializes in necks?
The lady was quite angry after giving birth to Male twins
Guess they were new sons to her.
What do you call a male dominatrix?
What do you call a male Mummy with a cold?
I'm not sure either. Sir Cough I guess.
What do you call a male ex-bee?
What do you get when you have 50 female pigs, and 50 male deer?
One hundred "sows and bucks" (100,000 bucks).
My son has recently been starting to suffer from early male pattern baldness, like I did at his age.
I think it‘s haireditery.
What do you call a male student's society sharing a common belief in a flat earth?
When males wear stuff made of iron they can change their gender
Two male zebras in the Zoo started making rap-music...
... they're called the Zbruhs.
What do you call a male renaissance artist with a bowl of jelly?
The worlds last male White Rhino died
What happens when a Male rectangle sees a female rectangle?
Jackie Chan recently announced that they have received the surgery to transition from male to female. Though, despite this, the most shocking part of this interview was her saying she will no longer be doing her own stunts.
She just doesn’t have the balls anymore
The pig mascot of the local college's male social organization died, so they decided to sell its meat...
They called them Frat Brats.
Did you know that for wingless insects, males will float and females will sink?
That's how you know they're buoyant
It always felt really weird to me how male authors are obsessed with the female body.
Always going on and on about their webbed feet and soft, insulated....
Oh wait, that's male otters
What do a male deer and a beaver have in common?
They both have buck teeth.
How do you tell the difference between female ants and male ants?
Drop the ant in a glass of water. If it sinks, it's a girl ant. If it floats, it's buoyant.
Why do male gypsies walk funny?
What do you call a male potato with a taste for tyranny?
What did the Nintendo say when congratulating the two male chefs?
My partner is learning about male genitalia and vasectomies
I told her there's a vas deferens between male and female genitalia
"Why are you telling me this story about a male hen?" I asked the bartender, confused.
He just looked at me and replied, "You asked for a cock tale, sir."
Why did the male giraffe break up with his girlfriend?
Because she was a cheetah.
It is said that male cows don't defecate
But as you See this is bullshit
What do you call a male dog?
If iron is Fe and another word for man is male...
Does that make Ironman female?
Male porn actors are working hard
My friend asked me at lunch today what the male parallel for "misogyny" was.
I told him, "Misterogyny".
Did you know Ironman is actually Fe male
What do you call a mentally handicapped young male gymnast born on August 1st?
I saw an all-male choir performing on the weekend. I said...
..."There are 99 people in that choir."
My son, who was with me, asked, "Wow dad! How did you count them so quickly?"
I replied, "They are singing >!"Africa" by Toto. It's something that a hundred men or more could never do.!<"
What did the pyromanic pirate say to his male offspring?
Whats another name for a male model?
How does the male pedophile witch make potions?
Where would you find a male programmer orgy?
What do you call a male ex-bee?