Very punny (places pun)

"I like European food so I decided to Russia over there because I was Hungary. After Czech'ing the menu I ordered Turkey. When I was Finnished I told the waiter 'Spain good but there is Norway I could eat another bite'."

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/turtleturds_
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2018
🚨︎ report
I got birth place
πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sggEeulB
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03
🚨︎ report
what is a Karen’s favorite place to drink?

A whine bar

πŸ‘︎ 51
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/psychrn1898
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06
🚨︎ report
She's going places.
πŸ‘︎ 938
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 25
🚨︎ report
Auditoriums are specially designed so that sound will bounce around the walls and ceiling in order to be projected to the audience. However, if you place a pigeon on the stage, the coo of said pigeon will not bounce.

This is because of a-coo-sticks.

πŸ‘︎ 160
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Nebulas-Entity
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17
🚨︎ report
Where's the best place to hide drugs in space?

Uranus.

πŸ‘︎ 34
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/danyodaddyo
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13
🚨︎ report
Did you know the Norwegian Navy place bar codes on their ships?

So when they come back to port they can Scandinavyin.

πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31
🚨︎ report
Once, I agreed to help Death move his couch to his new place.

After we got there, I realized I forgot those things you’re supposed to sit on. There were reaper cushions.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ghostwriter623
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
🚨︎ report
What's a baby cow's favorite place to eat?

I don't know, but you can bet it's not a steak joint.

-And you thought I was going to say a calf-eteria!

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CIMMGW
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22
🚨︎ report
Jeez, I went to Sweden because my wife wanted to but I didn't want to but now they closed their boarders and now that we went around the place and, I kinda like it

I guess I have Stockholm syndrome.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sickycrimson
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04
🚨︎ report
What's the place people want to visit the most?

The graveyard people are just dying to go there

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KyotoKyoto2525
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06
🚨︎ report
Arguing over current events is perfectly natural, but there’s a time and a place.

It makes people uncomfortable when they see you mask debating in public.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jimgolgari
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07
🚨︎ report
I once worked at a place where I had to use a pay-to-cross bridge 10 times a day...

That took a toll!

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
🚨︎ report
Where is the best place to buy meat in India?

At the Delhi

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CriticalBiscuits
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
🚨︎ report
I showed my friend my pond, including the best fishing spots and the place where the bank drops off...

I wish the First National would stop sending their packages to my pond's address...

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
🚨︎ report
Such a lovely place
πŸ‘︎ 85
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jessuh_
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14
🚨︎ report
Chinese place.
πŸ‘︎ 52
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 24
🚨︎ report
So my wife and I were driving through Pennsylvania today and drove by a place called Fort Necessity.

I looked at her and said β€œI’m trying very hard, but I don’t feel the need to go there”.

She didn’t say much to me the rest of our trip.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jbrogart17
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18
🚨︎ report
I think there’s a special place in hell for my friend Dante, because he’s always trolling animal rights activists.

Dante’s in fur now.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22
🚨︎ report
What is a snakes favorite place to live ?

Missssissssipi

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/datdragonfruittho
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28
🚨︎ report
My favorite place
πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DylanRFP6
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23
🚨︎ report
Despite curfews in place around the county, cops are out all night clubbing.
πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MrGutierrez
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07
🚨︎ report
What was the name of the Jumanji sequel that took place on a plane?

Flewmanji.

What was the name of the Jumanji sequel that took place in Wuhan?

Flumanji.

What was the name of the Jumanji sequel that took place in a fireplace?

Fluemanji

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/chuffed2bits
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14
🚨︎ report
This place has only a few workers.

They must have a staff infection.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DeRocka1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21
🚨︎ report
What's the best place to hide if a murderer breaks into your house?

The living room.

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04
🚨︎ report
The puns at this Chinese place are out of control
πŸ‘︎ 47
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/puppylove1000
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09
🚨︎ report
Is it a bird? Is it a place?
πŸ‘︎ 422
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Gamergod4now
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11
🚨︎ report
I just hear about a new chicken fastfood place opening up in Ukraine

It’s KievC.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/robindc_93
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21
🚨︎ report
Where is the safest place to be in an earthquake?

A stationary store

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/scottchiefbaker
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16
🚨︎ report
Can someone help me with this crossword puzzle? 7 letters, starts with R, clue is "Taken away from original place or position"

[removed]

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bishslap
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16
🚨︎ report
What did the brewer say to the baker during shelter in place?

At yeast we have each other!

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jessieface13
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25
🚨︎ report
Police: We need to talk to your son about the fire at your neighbor's place

Dad: Do you mean arson?

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kaushik_220601
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04
🚨︎ report
My wife got really mad at me when I told her that someone from the Jamaican Spice place was looking for her.

I said, β€œThe jerk store called for you.”

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12
🚨︎ report
Did you hear that the guy who got second place in that smoke machine design contest forgot how his prototype worked?

When they asked him about it, he said he didn’t have the foggiest idea.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HuecoTanks
πŸ“…︎ May 23
🚨︎ report
This really deserves a place here
πŸ‘︎ 317
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gaeboomering
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07
🚨︎ report
I went to my optometry clinic and said "I'm surprised this place isn't out of business yet......

because it's 20/20."

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05
🚨︎ report
I saw an interview with Sean Connery about how he used to scuba dive for seafood. He said, "everytime I saw a crab or lobster with a scrap of food, it was frantically seaching for a place to hide so it could eat alone. Then I thought to myself,

that's shellfish."

πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/timthedriller
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15
🚨︎ report
The most remote place on earth
πŸ‘︎ 34
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MONKEY_COCK_EATER
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26
🚨︎ report
I cant believe that locksmiths aren't working in some places

They are key workers after all

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/EarthPhl
πŸ“…︎ May 17
🚨︎ report
With so many places in lockdown, there have been more people than ever learning origami.

You might say interest has been in creasing

πŸ‘︎ 54
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/td941
πŸ“…︎ Apr 19
🚨︎ report
The worst place to buy a chess set you ask?

The pawn shop

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CliffordTheDragon
πŸ“…︎ May 01
🚨︎ report
The world has always been a horrible place

We just all have 20/20 vision to witness it this year.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PM_ME_THE_SLOTHS
πŸ“…︎ May 28
🚨︎ report
A murder took place. Everyone witnessed the crime being committed.

They know it was E who brutally killed the man in question. They saw it. Against all previous odds of his record coming clear, people testified.

A jury was formed to try E on these alleged crimes. Due to the extreme gore of the crime scene and its explicit details, it was a closed hearing. After hours of trial and testimony, E emerged, innocent in the eyes of the court. He was absolved of all charges.

Everyone wondered how he managed to pull it off.

There is a reason he is called Mr E.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12
🚨︎ report
I was reading a history book, and apparently in the middle east there were hundreds of years where nocturnal predator birds used to fly around and ejaculate all over the place. The Arabic people would keep each other up to date on the latest attacks; and so marked the beginning of...

The Owl Jizz Era News.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/nutsacktetherball
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22
🚨︎ report
My mother's mother lost her false teeth at the retirement home. We searched the place everywhere but couldn't find them.

We looked in every nook and granny!

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ May 21
🚨︎ report
If there’s one place I can’t stand...

It’s a bottomless pit

πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/QuantumTuna
πŸ“…︎ May 02
🚨︎ report
So with this lockdown in place

Does this make us all homies?

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SliverSerfer
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21
🚨︎ report
What do you call a place where annelids work out?

An Earthworm Gym.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BlastLeatherwing
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07
🚨︎ report
If The Beauty and the Beast took place in America, "Beauty" would have to be from the South

Because she's a Southern Belle

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Eagleeatworld
πŸ“…︎ May 13
🚨︎ report
Can you name 3 places in Scotland that are also the names of Grand Prix winning racing drivers?
  1. (Lewis) Hamilton

  2. Stirling (Moss)

  3. Ayr Town Centre!!!

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Stoatwobbler
πŸ“…︎ May 18
🚨︎ report
When dad took the family to Florida, we finally got to see the place his boat was docked as a child...

It was good to see dad's berth place.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30
🚨︎ report
What do you do if you break your leg in two places?

Never, EVER go back to those two places.

πŸ‘︎ 38
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06
🚨︎ report
Once a year I celebrate getting a sleeping place all to myself.

It's my berth day.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/13toycar
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23
🚨︎ report
Browsing reddit on mobile? Place your device on your body.

r/dadjokes on you!

πŸ‘︎ 210
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/neloc1
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2019
🚨︎ report
People usually say, β€œlet’s blow this popsicle stand,” when they are at a place where people are cold and have the proverbial, β€œstick up their ass.”
πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ForestValkyrie
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23
🚨︎ report
Have you heard of a place where all the tall people gather to drink ?

It's called Tallinn

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dope_DUD
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29
🚨︎ report
the other day I was looking up secret places to work out

thought it would be pretty crappy, but there are a fair amount of hidden gyms

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/scooopofpeas
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30
🚨︎ report
What's a terrorist's favorite place to eat?

An Allah snack bar

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/B100DW0RTH
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13
🚨︎ report
My dad's just messaged me saying my mum noticed her eyebrows have gone today. He drew some rabbits in their place and sent me a photo..

Asking if they look like hares from a distance!

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/coolez-nunez
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18
🚨︎ report
My friend found a sturdy piece of lumber to place within his guitar to improve the vibrations...

It was a soundboard

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24
🚨︎ report
Might not be the appropriate place for this, but here is a bold take

Take

πŸ‘︎ 61
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/midget_messiah
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28
🚨︎ report
A child was bored out of his mind. His mother told him that they are going to the laundry mat and the child said "that is the most boring place on earth."

Then the mother said, "Come on, it will be loads of fun."

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Arceist_Justin
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10
🚨︎ report
My girlfriends place is filled with bees!

She's a keeper...

πŸ‘︎ 61
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/linkhandford
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26
🚨︎ report
Antarctica is the only place left without the Corona virus

I guess because they are icelated.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/R3DW01F728
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24
🚨︎ report
What happened to the frog when it parked in the wrong place?

It got toad

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/royaj77
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08
🚨︎ report
Why's a church the worst place to go during a war?

Because of all the pews.

pew, pew, pew pew pew!

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15
🚨︎ report
Where is the best place to get camel milk?

Straight from the Dromedairy.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/unicycleguy06
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10
🚨︎ report
The safest place to be during an earthquake would be…

…in a stationary store…

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13
🚨︎ report
Stuck between a croc and a hard place gfycat.com/dizzyzealousco…
πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10
🚨︎ report
A few weeks ago I was vacationing, but when I realized how serious the coronavirus was in this place

Iran

πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/h0ldmycovfefe
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11
🚨︎ report
This place in Jakarta, Indonesia was a Taxi Pool last week
πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cloud68
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03
🚨︎ report
My friend's place is infested with ants, but he doesn't care.

He's just ignorant

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/invisible_being
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23
🚨︎ report
When places ran out of toilet paper people started buying paper towel instead

They found a new bounty

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kashindabank
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19
🚨︎ report
What's a cat's favorite place to visit while in the middle East?

The Purrsian Gulf

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thebobstu
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17
🚨︎ report
I place guitar picks on unsuspecting people

I'm a pickpocket

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Roy55514
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08
🚨︎ report
Why is the morgue the best place to work at a hospital?

They give you the coroner office.

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JasonInNJ
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27
🚨︎ report
Where is the cleanest place to sit?

The bleachers!

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05
🚨︎ report
Harry Potter is a good place for puns
πŸ‘︎ 35
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/yeet-boi-2010
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02
🚨︎ report
Since the government's instituted shelter-in-place orders, lions have been roaming main street...

It's a Pride Parade.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21
🚨︎ report
Is this the right place for this?
πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SuicidualRussian
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Where is the best place to work if you only have one leg?

IHOP

πŸ‘︎ 50
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cherryskies13
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2019
🚨︎ report
The instructor in my self defence class told me that the most effective place to kick a man is near his knees.

Personally, I think it’s nuts.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2019
🚨︎ report
I bet you any money I could beat Mike Tyson. Any time. Any place.

Beat him at chess, that is.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/boilerup4444
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07
🚨︎ report
Dylan's girlfriend broke up with him and told her she needed some time apart but Dylan went looking for her place anyway.

I guess he didn't know what apartment.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Chanureadeats
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28
🚨︎ report
Where’s the best place to go when you’re broke?

To work

(Courtesy of Dave Ramsey)

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bear-Scout-Mae
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30
🚨︎ report
I'm TIRED of this place v.redd.it/gvc68uebhh441
πŸ‘︎ 36
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/janhetjoch
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Why do less marriages take place in winter

Because most of the brides get cold feet.

πŸ‘︎ 62
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/asian_despot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call steak from a sketchy place?

Beef Janky

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Redreversecard
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20
🚨︎ report

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