Ooh that’s on point
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/crumble-bee
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09
🚨︎ report
No no He's got a point
πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_3oi_
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2020
🚨︎ report
He has got a point
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/7keletor
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2020
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No no, he’s got a point
πŸ‘︎ 99
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 11
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I was starting to get worried about my Karma points on Reddit...

But getting over it was a piece of cake.

πŸ‘︎ 79
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BigZ41
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2020
🚨︎ report
My kid is at the point where they want to put bandaids on everything...

I swear this is a true organic dad joke I had tonight. Felt I’d share it with reddit.

My kid came up to me and says β€œoh no, look dad, it needs a bandaid” as she gently presents her imaginarily injured bouncy ball.

I looked at my kid and said β€œI don’t think it needs a bandaid, he looks like he’s going to bounce back”

πŸ‘︎ 148
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ruum-502
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Services to the point
πŸ‘︎ 50
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πŸ‘€︎ u/viky_boy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
🚨︎ report
No, No. He's Got a Point
πŸ‘︎ 89
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πŸ‘€︎ u/its_boogeyman
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Most people consider the Battle of Gettysburg the turning point of the American Civil War

For the Confederacy, it all went South from there

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/speedoc
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you guys hear about the new Space Jam sequel where Marvin the Martian joins the Monstars, scores all of their points and they win it all?

You should check it out, it’s a really good Martian Scores’easy film

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AquamarineCheetah
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
🚨︎ report
A man drew a line in the middle of himself to prove a point...

He was half right

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JK-AJ27
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a person who points out the obvious

The person who points out the obvious

πŸ‘︎ 130
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TarikAlic
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2020
🚨︎ report
There is no point in adding an extra 's' to the word needles.

It's needless.

πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/amar610
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
🚨︎ report
The XFL hit their lowest point ever.

The Rock bought β€˜em

πŸ‘︎ 80
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CankerMan
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2020
🚨︎ report
My 9 month pregnant wife is ready to have our child any day now, but they just won’t come. She’s tried everything she can at this point. Sex, walking, dancing, spicy foods, etc... So when I asked her what I could do to help she said β€œany means necessary.”

To which I replied β€œNo it doesn’t.”

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FreshStartGo
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
🚨︎ report
My cat got 10/10 points at a beauty contest

Purrfection

πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tomenmeta
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2020
🚨︎ report
A guy walks into the bank, pulls out a gun, points it at the teller and screams, β€œGive me all your money or you’re geography!”

The teller replies, β€œDon’t you mean history?”

The robber says, β€œDon’t change the subject!"

πŸ‘︎ 14k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bot_10
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2019
🚨︎ report
At one point in my life I wanted to become a plumber

But it was too draining

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/karma-enigma
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2020
🚨︎ report
There's no point in getting mad at lazy people

They haven't done anything

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Akainatsume
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the architecture student get points off on his blueprint of a Soviet house?

Unnecessary Marx and Engels.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/subpar-at-best
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I don't get the point of circles

They're just pointless.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/creeper321448
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
🚨︎ report
I don’t see the point of slurry

It’s all bullshit

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ONIONSAREKINGS
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I don’t get the point of slurry

It’s all bullshit

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ONIONSAREKINGS
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I was racing with my younger brother on the track, and then he got mad that I didn’t draw a finish line marker on the sand. We kept racing but he kept losing, and at one point he got so mad he threw a tantrum and started hitting and punching and kicking me furiously

.....and that’s when I drew the line.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/singh_j
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Why couldn't the point go any further?

Beacuse it was the end of the line

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/clark_creationz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Their puns are on point
πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/throwawaytrol7134
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2020
🚨︎ report
The school made the use of "bullet points" illegal because it incited violence in the classroom, and I must admit I couldn't have cared less. That's all changed now, though.

The bus driver isn't allowed to drive my kids anymore because we live on a dead end street.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2020
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Her anger jumped discontinuously at that point in time.

Me: My love for you is 0/0 Her: Aww, infinite? Me: Nahh,Undefined. Her: Why are you like this, is there no limit to your stupidity? Me: Umm, now that you say it, I should've applied a limit to it. Her: I want to break your bones, ugh. Me: So are you saying that I'll have to re-visit the l'hospital?

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Wait wait, they've got a point
πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Un_FaZed211
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Louis Braille raised a valid point that made sense.
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/deejay22998
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Point finger: β€œwhat’s that?”

My two year old pointed across the street and asked, β€œwhat’s that?”

I tried to guess and he is often trying to learn the names of things. β€œA tree? A car? Grass? A bird?”

No to all of them.

Then he said, β€œit’s a finger.”

I got dad joked by my two year old.

πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Grammer on point
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bongnazi
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2019
🚨︎ report
I explained to my wife, "Darling, it doesn't matter if your cup is half full or half empty, my point is..."

"You need to buy a different size bra!"

πŸ‘︎ 46
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2020
🚨︎ report
[REQUEST] I'll get straight to the point, I need a knife pun

As the title says, I need a pun that involves two unlikely friends. Knives and Charity/donations.

Any help would be appreciated!

Knife to be here in this community

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/oliverpls599
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Truly a man of many points
πŸ‘︎ 582
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Poisonouslungs
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I buy yogurt to the point where some people call it hoarding

But I know it’s just cultured behaviour

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rant-rant-rant
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
🚨︎ report
After an argument, my cooking instructor wants me to stew goose feathers gently below or just at the boiling point...

She wants me to simmer down!

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2020
🚨︎ report
I like the smell of my wife whenever she complains about justifiable points

I really like her fairer moans

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Yesterday I had a 10-point, an 8-point, and a 4-point buck in my yard at the same time.

It was a stag party

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tenglempls
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2020
🚨︎ report
As an immigration officer, I may not always agree with your point of view..

But I can see where you are coming from.

πŸ‘︎ 128
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2020
🚨︎ report
I was having an argument with my wife and she said I had a point

I didn't realise we were meant to keep score

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/invisible_being
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2020
🚨︎ report
My ex girlfriend had the laziest cat, she was so lazy I actually at one point thought it was dead.

Turned out it was just catatonic.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/oppy1984
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2020
🚨︎ report
A man drew a line on himself to prove a point

He was half right

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JK-AJ27
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
🚨︎ report
The XFL just hit their lowest point ever.

The Rock bought β€˜em.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CankerMan
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2020
🚨︎ report

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