I tried googling tips to stop procrastinating but I ended up reading about photography
Turns out I canβt focus!
ποΈ 4k
π
οΈ Apr 18 2021
I lost the tips of my feet in an accident, and later when I told my friend what happened he suddenly punched me.
Turns out heβs lack-toes intolerant
ποΈ 117
π
οΈ May 30 2021
Chinese take out: 8 dollars. Tip: 2 dollars. Getting home to find out they forgot part of your order...
ποΈ 14k
π
οΈ Dec 15 2020
Pri-tip for you
Prison is easier if you stay incell
ποΈ 5
π
οΈ Apr 05 2021
And thatβs not the tip of the iceberg
ποΈ 20
π
οΈ Feb 20 2021
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Mar 31 2021
Oh damn guess I get to keep my tip
ποΈ 5k
π
οΈ Jul 05 2020
My kid said he didnβt want the tri tip I bought him for dinner
So I told him if he didnβt eat, his life would be at steak
ποΈ 4
π
οΈ Dec 27 2020
I kept telling my brother not to put the Q-tip in too deep, but he never listens to my words.
It goes into one ear, and out the other.
ποΈ 16
π
οΈ Jan 22 2021
I tried to give the Uber Eats driver another tip for my Vietnamese soup.
ποΈ 3
π
οΈ Jan 25 2021
Donβt forget to tip the waitress
ποΈ 120
π
οΈ Sep 02 2020
thanks for the tip
ποΈ 214
π
οΈ Apr 27 2020
Life Pro Tip ~ Don't ever put ducks in a cement mixer becauseβ¦
You'll get quacks in the pavement!
ποΈ 11
π
οΈ Dec 11 2020
Pro tip: If you are looking for a cheap way to work out at home, consider using milk jugs as weights.
But be sure to use almond or soy milk, Iβve heard theyβre the healthier alternatives.
ποΈ 5
π
οΈ Dec 16 2020
Those tips should never be foresakeskin.
ποΈ 66
π
οΈ Apr 14 2020
The tall guy who tips off the ball to start basketball games was found deceased at mid-court...
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Oct 27 2020
Why did the egg tip the waiter
Because the food was eggcellent
ποΈ 3
π
οΈ Aug 31 2020
I have a great safety tip for Halloween this year
ποΈ 6
π
οΈ Sep 30 2020
Christmas Tip
ποΈ 4k
π
οΈ Dec 05 2018
Son, you should always tip the waitress
Tip her, but donβt let her fall
ποΈ 10
π
οΈ Sep 01 2020
Customers always ask if I take tips
But I say no since I don't like change
ποΈ 5
π
οΈ Sep 16 2020
Dis a tip of the cone
ποΈ 22
π
οΈ Jun 05 2020
Donβt forget to tip your server
ποΈ 1k
π
οΈ Apr 16 2019
My girlfriend told me that she was worried she was turning into a costal area at the southwestern tip of the Gower Peninsula in south Wales. I said to her...
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Sep 16 2020
Those tips should never be foresakeskin.
ποΈ 32
π
οΈ Apr 24 2020
I always give good tips to my waiters
"be nice to your customers"
ποΈ 8
π
οΈ Jul 08 2020
Tech tip: Itβs dangerous to download βCome Sail Awayβ or βSatisfactionβ on ITunes. βTurn, Turn, Turnβ is perfectly fine however.
Styx and Stones may break your phones, but the Byrds will never hurt you.
ποΈ 6k
π
οΈ Apr 05 2018
Pro Tip: If you have a gashed wound, it is cheaper to go to a comedy club than the emergency room.
You just pay the cover charge and they'll have you in stitches.
ποΈ 14
π
οΈ Apr 10 2020
Helpful tip for a knife fight
ποΈ 33
π
οΈ Sep 29 2019
So I was rolling coins from my tip money and placing the rolled up sleeves on each other forming a kind of pyramid shape:
My sister walks up to me and asks: βAre you creating a pyramid scheme?β
ποΈ 4
π
οΈ Jun 05 2020
Quarantine Tip #19: Yesterday I ran out of soap and body wash and all I could find was dish detergent.
ποΈ 8
π
οΈ Mar 21 2020
Quarantine Tip #2:
Diarrhea is an early symptom of Coronavirus infection.
So try to loaf as long as you can.
That's a solid tip.
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Mar 24 2020
Here's a tip:
ποΈ 11
π
οΈ Jan 19 2020
Tip of the day: The toilets at Lowes are just for display.
(they should put signs on those, or something..)
ποΈ 4
π
οΈ Dec 14 2019
Just the tip
ποΈ 51
π
οΈ Mar 09 2019
Felt tip maka
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Oct 26 2019
I spent all day trying to balance a screw on it's tip.
All I ended up doing by the end was just screwing around.
ποΈ 6
π
οΈ Jan 19 2020
Now that's a tip
ποΈ 15
π
οΈ Jul 13 2019
Tip of my tongue
Guys, help me out here. I can't remember the name of this old action movie. Bilbo Baggins has to stop a terrorist plot and save his wife in the Nakatomi Towers. Oh, that's it.
Old Hobbits Die Hard.
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Feb 17 2020
Tips to make running on a treadmill more bearable
ποΈ 9
π
οΈ Dec 30 2019
A financial tip: Donβt invest in skiing companies.
The entire sport is going downhill fast.
ποΈ 428
π
οΈ Apr 24 2018
If youβre looking for a tip: Wait for it...
ποΈ 5
π
οΈ Nov 13 2019
Whenever I go out to eat I always tip my server.
I've also learned that servers have horrible balance.
ποΈ 60
π
οΈ Aug 29 2019
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.