I hate K-pop because listening to it reminds me of the time I spent in the Korean war and leads to extreme anxiety

My doctor says I may have BTSD.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 55
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Shoor_veer
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 04 2021
🚨︎ report
Have you seen who's playing the lead in the new Blind Batman film?

It's Christian Braille.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SquiddlyD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 04 2021
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Since they are filming Spider-Man 3 near my house, I thought I’d write the lead actor an orchestral piece...

I think I’ll call it β€œMr. Holland’s Opus”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/leeericewing
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 05 2021
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People don't believe me when I tell them I'm the lead singer in a Black Eyed Peas tribute band....

Well I am.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I did my navigation task and it lead me straight to you...❀️❀️❀️
πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/hustle_champ
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 31 2020
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TIL Elton John wrote an unreleased song about his short-lived affair with the lead actor in "Who's The Boss?"

He called it, "Hold Me Closer, Tony Danza"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SusheeMonster
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 21 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the director of the stage production of Cinderella say, after the lead called out sick before opening night?

Get the understudy, the shoe, must go on!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/uneeq33
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Sunk like a lead baloon
πŸ‘οΈŽ 35
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RogueDisciple
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Wouldn't be surprised to learn Elon Musk to leads a mercenary team of tesla employees who bite victims to spread coronavirus

They are called the Flu Flux Fang!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/16thPeregrine
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 28 2020
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You can lead a horticulture,

but you can't make her think.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Aw8nf8
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 23 2020
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Arsenic, cadmium, and lead decided to start a band.

They were a heavy metal group.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/erebus
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 10 2020
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Did you hear about the time the lead singer of the band β€œThe Police” went undercover to catch a criminal?

It was a Sting operation

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/dig-ol-bick
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Dad picked up some cadmium, osmium, and lead

*Dad is hammering around in the garage*

Son: Whatcha doing?

Dad: I'm thinking about playing in heavy metal band

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/techtornado
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know the Ace of Base lead singer was also a mathematician?

She saw the sine.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/zedhead0628
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 29 2020
🚨︎ report
And now the pasta will lead us in a hymn...
πŸ‘οΈŽ 3k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Razabeth
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 06 2019
🚨︎ report
Geese fly in a V-formation for aerodynamics, and when the lead goose gets tired he switches out his position. But one side of the V is almost always longer than the other. Do you know why?

More geese on that side.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 58
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/gamerspoon
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Lead and read
πŸ‘οΈŽ 98
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CrazyLeonGR
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 03 2020
🚨︎ report
If you're looking for a lead singer for your wham cover band

I'm your man

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/74CK
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Being on this subreddit too long may lead to

Punintended consequences

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/zsm1994
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear the lead singer of disturbed isn’t going to self isolate?

He’s down with the sickness.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 28
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/E-radi-cate
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Honestly I woudden't lead someone else steel this pun
πŸ‘οΈŽ 495
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/1_hele_euro
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 22 2019
🚨︎ report
hear about how deodorant lead to the capture of a cold war agent?

the scent of old spies gave him away

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/asianwaste
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Working on a crossword puzzle. Can anyone tell me the first initial and last name of the lead actor from Cast Away?

Thanks.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/spongebue
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 01 2020
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Makeup used to contain lead that actually make their skin worse.

That is a bit iron-ic.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/erkang06
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 22 2020
🚨︎ report
President Trump just picked a fish to lead the coronavirus response team

He’s the Sturgeon General

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JonSolo1
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Some filmmakers were secretly trying to murder the lead actor in a low-budget flick, but he got wind of the plot and managed to escape. They took the existing footage and shopped it to different producers, but it was roundly rejected by everyone for the same reason.

It wasn't up to snuff.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jeromocles
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 05 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a pencil with no lead?

Pointless

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Rammanoodle
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 14 2020
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I bought a wooden whistle but it wooden whistle. I bought a steel whistle but it steel wooden whistle. So I bought a lead whistle

But it steel wooden lead me whistle

πŸ‘οΈŽ 39
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Jack_Dawesome
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 03 2019
🚨︎ report
I accidentally sat upon a solo album by the lead guitarist, keyboardist and backing vocalist of the band U2 but quickly jumped up, scared that I broke it.

For a second, I was on Edge.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Why can't Plastic Man lead an orchestra?

Because he's a poor conductor

πŸ‘οΈŽ 24
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/itsxenix
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Told the x-ray technician I'm made of lead

But she could see right through me.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/justryingtokeepup
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Who will lead the army of drawing utensils?

The ruler.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 50
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Pdonkey
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 07 2019
🚨︎ report
All forms of smoking suck and drinking leads to pour health.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Irv-Elephant
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 14 2019
🚨︎ report
What did Justin Timberlake say when the lead singer of Weezer asked him to name a major peninsula on the northern coast of the Black Sea?

Crimea, Rivers.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/underdog_rox
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 24 2019
🚨︎ report
How can a simple spelling mistake lead to a lost pregnancy?

Pregnot

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ChrisCGCToo
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 23 2019
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I knew a lead actor who really did "break a leg" when he slipped off the stage during his performance.

He had a really great cast.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/WhiteNerdyDelitesome
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 26 2019
🚨︎ report
Flint Michigan is the lead cause of problems in the US right now
πŸ‘οΈŽ 1k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jokitheraccoon
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 02 2016
🚨︎ report
If I ever meet the lead singer of Pearl Jam, I hope he asks me how I’m doing

So I can respond β€œif I was Eddie Vedder, I’d be you”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Mistapiss
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the ticks lead a revolution?

because the had the blood of the proletariat inside them.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/am_sphee
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Autocorrect leads to opportunity.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/NUMB_NUTS_417
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 23 2018
🚨︎ report
Oh no, the lead singer of Disturbed has Coronavirus

He’s DOWN WITH THE SICKNESS

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/typhis76
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Sting has disappeared, The Police have no lead
πŸ‘οΈŽ 216
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/david7494
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 04 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a pencil without lead?

Pointless.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/puggoamber
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 13 2019
🚨︎ report
You can lead a horticulture ...

but you can't make her think

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kickypie
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 20 2019
🚨︎ report

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