I found a "Pocket Guide to Male Masturbation"

I think it will really come in handy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RoboHobo25
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14
🚨︎ report
A comprehensive guide to take your Dad joke to the next level...

Tell it upstairs.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dylanmeanttosay
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29
🚨︎ report
"Son, do you think we should find an expert to guide us in our trek up Mt. Everest?"

"Sure, pa."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/logansworth
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02
🚨︎ report
Here's a step-by-step guide on how to fall down stairs!

Step 28

Step 27

Step 24

Step 21

Step 16

Step 12

Step 7

Step 3

Step 1

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πŸ‘€︎ u/icemage27
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Our captain is a terrible tour guide

He’s always telling people to come on bored

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πŸ‘€︎ u/saucyminnow
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21
🚨︎ report
From my kids... Would you like a guide to falling down the stairs.

Step 1 Step 2 Step 3 Step 6 Step 9...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SolarGuy55
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16
🚨︎ report
Who is the official tour guide for the Vatican?

Cardinal Directions

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GamesNBooks
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01
🚨︎ report
Did you know you can hire a guide to take you through the labyrinth in sixty seconds?

It's a minute tour.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mahare
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2020
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Sherlock Holmes never buys a TV Guide at Christmas.

He knows Watson.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WhoElseButAlf
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Any dog can be a guide dog...

...if you don't care where you're going.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
🚨︎ report
While taking a tour of a college campus, the tour guide mentioned that the school was surrounded by three different cemeteries.

Tour guide: And did you know that if you live across from a cemetery, you can’t be buried there?

Me: What?? Why not?

Tour guide: Because you’re still alive!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lind-zayy
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Step by step guide on how to run..
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ladyMariaOfKosm
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Where does a Himalayan guide buy their clothes?

At the Sherpa Image store!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Xeper-Institute
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2020
🚨︎ report
A blind man walks into a bar with his guide dog.

Then he starts spinning his leashed dog around himself. The bartender asks him what the Hell is he doing, and the blind man goes:

"Just looking around..."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Alexasha05
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Blind guy walks into a department store and starts swinging his guide dog in circles over his head.

A shop keeper asks him what he is doing and he replies "Taking a look around."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Boop108
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2020
🚨︎ report
The tour guide says...

...Thank you for visiting the two-wheeled, self-balancing personal transporter museum today; I hope you had a good time. Speaking of good times, check out the food court and gift shop before you leave.

Me: That's a Segway

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dlveazie
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2019
🚨︎ report
It was a sunny day out on the lake. I'd forgotten my cap. Luckily, I had a flyer from the local department store. I folded it into a hat with a shade for my eyes, thus making it easier to guide the boat without crashing it.

It made a good ad visor.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2019
🚨︎ report
A guide on how to tell dad jokes:

Step 1: walk up to dad Step 2: tell dad a joke

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tomc128
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2019
🚨︎ report
I was on a safari in Africa when one of the tourists asked our guide, β€œIs it difficult to spot cheetahs?”

He said, β€œNo, they usually come that way.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Douglas Adams finished writing the first chapter of A Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

He thought, β€œFinally! I put A Dent in that book!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2019
🚨︎ report
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2019
🚨︎ report
After looking at the galactic traveller's guide, I was shocked by our solar system's rating.

We only had one star.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wyxlor
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2018
🚨︎ report
A quick guide on "How to fall downstairs":

Step 1

Step 6

Step 8, 9, 10, 11.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Yea_I_Reddit
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2017
🚨︎ report
A quick guide to being grounded

Dad: What is the opposite if maximum

Son: Minimum?

Dad: No, it's minidad! Stares with a huge smile on the face

Son: ...

Dad: ...

Son: ...

Dad: Olay go to your room, you're grounded!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OMEN786
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2019
🚨︎ report
My soon is climbing Everest. I asked him if he had a guide.

He said β€œSure pa”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NorthEastGrey
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2018
🚨︎ report
I was reading a guide on Immanuel Kant

But a manual can't do experience justice

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WesternDrop3321
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2019
🚨︎ report
From The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

β€œYou know,” said Arthur, β€œit’s at times like this, when I’m trapped in a Vogon airlock with a man from Betelgeuse, and about to die of asphyxiation in deep space that I really wish I’d listened to what my mother told me when I was young.” β€œWhy, what did she tell you?” β€œI don’t know, I didn’t listen.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/user120300
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2018
🚨︎ report
Why don't blind people clean up after their guide dogs?

Because they can't see shit!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RudigherJones
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2018
🚨︎ report
A two step survival guide if you are stuck on a desserted island.
  1. Check the spelling.

  2. If correct, grab a spoon.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2018
🚨︎ report
The front of an FDA guide on marijuana

FDA Regulation of Marijuana: Past Actions, Future Plans Douglas C. Throckmorton, M.D. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) ICSB/ASP Joint Meeting April 12, 2016


A Joint meeting on marijuana...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spotted_Lady
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2018
🚨︎ report
The first million people to send me a million dollars, will get a copy of my guide.

Of how to become a millionaire from Reddit.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/StevenBosc
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2018
🚨︎ report
I dad joked my tour guide today

She was showing me around a class and the different stuff that they do. A table she was showing me had a light in it and helps line stuff up

Her: "This is what we call a light table."

Me: "It looks pretty heavy to me."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LetsNotPlay
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2014
🚨︎ report
Step by step guide on how to fall down stairs.

Step 1:

Step 2:

Step 4:

Step 7:

Step 12:

Step 18:

Step 25:

Hospital

πŸ‘︎ 125
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FriedLime
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2020
🚨︎ report
A guide on how to fall down the stairs

Step 1, Step 2, Step 3, Step 6, Step 12

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Connor0388
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Step by step guide on how to fall down the stairs.

Step 1:

Step 2:

Step 4:

Step 7:

Step 12:

Step 18:

Step 25:

Hospital

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FriedLime
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Here’s a step by step guide for riding an escalator.

Step 1.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KoronaSenpai
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2020
🚨︎ report
A guide on how to fall down the stairs:

Step 1, Step 2, Step 3, Step 6, Step 12

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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Cosmic_Kitten
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2019
🚨︎ report
How to fall down the stairs, a step by step guide

Step 1. Step2. Step 3. Step 4. Step 5. Step 6. ...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/patmcheese
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Here’s a simple guide on how to ride an escalator.

Step 1.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Here’s a step by step guide on how to ride an escalator.

Step 1.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2019
🚨︎ report
Here’s a step by step guide for riding an escalator.

Step 1.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2019
🚨︎ report
How to walk up the stairs, a step by step guide
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Patriarch_FH
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2019
🚨︎ report
A quick guide on "How to fall downstairs"...

Step 1

Step 6

Step 8, 9, 10, 11...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2017
🚨︎ report
A quick guide on how to fall down the stairs

Step 1 Step 3 Step 6 Step 9,10,11,12

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sweaty_Bollocks
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2018
🚨︎ report

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