Theyโ€™re demoting me from food server to host starting Monday.

I canโ€™t wait.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 22
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/OK_Compooper
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 13
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
People hate Mondays because they are also

Moandays

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/RajdorUzu
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 07
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Monday: Greg. Tuesday: Ian: Wednesday: Greg. Thursday: Ian. Friday: Greg

A GregOrIan calendar

๐Ÿ‘︎ 67
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Rob_Haggis
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 17
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
On Monday we start diarrhoea awareness week.

It runs until Friday.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 29
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/althistorysports
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 28
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
On Monday we start Diarrhea Awareness Week.

Runs until Friday.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 141
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/JoeFas
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 12
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
(Monday: Greg) (Tuesday: Ian) (Wednesday: Greg) (Thursday: Ian) (Friday: Greg) (Saturday: Ian) (Sunday: Greg)

Its the Gregorian calendar

๐Ÿ‘︎ 10k
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/OrionHunter66
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 04 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Someone has a case of the Mondays!
๐Ÿ‘︎ 67
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/habsfan1112
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 13 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I found out why Mondayโ€™s are so bad

They are so mundane.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/SCAR-HAMR
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 13
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I know a lot of you are sad because itโ€™s a Monday.

But donโ€™t forget, only 48 hours ago, it was a sadder day.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 11k
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 22 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday

Those were the days

๐Ÿ‘︎ 43
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Little_Mog
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why does Gordon Ramsay not like watching WWE on Monday nights?

Because its RAW!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 13
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/F1racist
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 19 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why is Sunday stronger than Monday?

Because Monday is a weekday...

๐Ÿ‘︎ 108
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ryannbajaj
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 13 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I hate Mondays

They're too mundayne

๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Thymear
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 22 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday.

Oh.... those were the days....

๐Ÿ‘︎ 21
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/bbtehbuild
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 07 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Kid: Mom I donโ€™t have school on Monday, the school calendar says itโ€™s โ€œmilkโ€ day.

Mom: Milk day?.... O honey you mean Martin Luther King Day! He was a famous civil rights leader.

Kid: O yea I know him! He said โ€œI have a dreamโ€

Dad: yes, โ€œI have a dream that one day milk and chocolate milk will live in harmony.โ€

Actual conversation last night

๐Ÿ‘︎ 19
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Drmario420
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 17 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Got a good deal on Cybertron Monday
๐Ÿ‘︎ 68
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Lams1d
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 05 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do you call a Sunday dinner eaten on a Monday?

Cold

๐Ÿ‘︎ 20
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/hufflepuffrhino
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 22 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why did the owners of the Indian food restaurant decide to be closed on Mondays?

They were tired of working naan stop and needed to tikka break.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ClimbingCactus
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 09 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
So April Fool's falls on a Monday this year.

Is this a joke?

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DoomRulz
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 01 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday.

Ah. Those were the days....

๐Ÿ‘︎ 135
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 01 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
"So you currently work 9 to 5, Monday through Friday," said my boss.

"That is correct," I replied.

He said, "Would you be able to work outside those hours?"

I said, "No, I might catch a cold."

๐Ÿ‘︎ 20
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TommehBoi
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 28 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
He's got a case of the Mondays (x-posted from /r/funny)
๐Ÿ‘︎ 372
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/akanyan
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 24 2017
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Uh-Oh! Someone has a case of the Mondays!
๐Ÿ‘︎ 43
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/whatsthatbutt
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 20 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Doctor, doctor, will my measles be better by next Monday?

I donโ€™t wanna make any rash promises

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/CptFunTIme
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 09 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Looks like someone has a case of the Mondays!
๐Ÿ‘︎ 70
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/CasaNovascape
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 13 2017
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Me: "There's going to be a foot of snow by Monday."

Dad: "No, we need two."

Me: "??"

Dad: "How else are we going to walk?"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/SourTaco18
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 08 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why was Sunday afraid of Monday?

Because Monday through Friday

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TheGreatSalvador
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 05 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
For five years, I've been drawing visual pun puzzles and putting them up on Mondays. They're kinda hard but really fun to solve. Here are a few. imgur.com/a/4s6Qf
๐Ÿ‘︎ 133
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/mrmailbox
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 15 2015
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
It's true! After Monday and Tuesday,

Even the calendar says "WTF"!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/thomasbrakeline
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 10 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I heard a rumor that you lift weights only on Saturday and Sunday because Monday to Friday are weak days.
๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Pm_pic_of_your_tits
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 19 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A lot of people dislike Mondays...

But 48 hours ago was a sadder day.

( OP here )

๐Ÿ‘︎ 17
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TheVikingJarl13
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 21 2017
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I finally made a website of all of my pun doodles. Except they're puzzles, so you have to figure them out. New posts every monday. Enjoy. mondaypunday.com/59
๐Ÿ‘︎ 10
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/mrmailbox
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 17 2012
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Monday Punday - Can you guess it? mondaypunday.com/
๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/timmymayes
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 10 2015
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I went to pick up my calculator off a table last Monday, only to drop it on the floor.

I looked at the guy next to me and said,
"Miscalculated."

๐Ÿ‘︎ 56
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Nesano
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 10 2014
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Beer Monday!

I want a beer to come out called the "The Mondays", so I can get a case of it.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/awhitehatter
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 13 2017
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Watching Monday Night Football with my dad

The game is being played in Mexico City, the American National Anthem has just been sung, and another singer comes out to sing the Mexican National Anthem...

My dad: "this must be Josรฉ Can You See?"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/dsubandbeard
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 22 2016
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I am pretty pumped to watched Citizenfour on HBO Monday, girlfriend replies: Does this count?!

"Let's watch Snowden when we're snowed in!"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 14
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/omfgregg
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 20 2015
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Starting Monday right
  • Co-Woker: It's chilly today
  • Me: No, today is Monday
  • Co-Worker: I will kick you in the head with my left boot.
๐Ÿ‘︎ 9
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/cuban_sailor
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 27 2014
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My Dad just won this year's Cyber Monday Dad Joke

http://i.imgur.com/HyijC2g.png

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TylortheConqueror
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 30 2015
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Grandma: Is it going to rain on Monday?

Mom: It says it's going to rain on my phone. Dad: Well it's not going to rain on my phone!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/shawnup
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 27 2014
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Watching Monday Night Football...

Dad: what do you think they call people from Baltimore?

Me: I don't know...

Dad:...Balti-morons...

.....

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TitsMcGee103
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 25 2014
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday

Those were the days...

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2k
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Auralore
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 10 2016
๐Ÿšจ︎ report

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