On Saturday, my son confronted me about why I spend time with him on only 1 day of the week, but I spend time with his sister every other day. I told him that I would take him to the movies tomorrow, and he asked if it was 'just because he asked'.

I told him, 'no, because it's Son Day'.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29
🚨︎ report
Scientists have noticed that patients who have the cold feel better on Saturdays and Sundays.

It’s the weekend immune system.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18
🚨︎ report
After my uncle had his arm amputated, he named his nub β€œSaturday.”

He said it was his weak end.

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 12
🚨︎ report
I'm getting fibre installed on Saturday.

It'll be nice to finally have regular internet.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gilbertsmith
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22
🚨︎ report
Saturday and Sunday are the strongest days...

Cause Monday through Friday are the week days.

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Adam_Beeler
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21
🚨︎ report
(Monday: Greg) (Tuesday: Ian) (Wednesday: Greg) (Thursday: Ian) (Friday: Greg) (Saturday: Ian) (Sunday: Greg)

Its the Gregorian calendar

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/OrionHunter66
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2019
🚨︎ report
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday

Those were the days

πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Little_Mog
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
🚨︎ report
My sister was hired to sew 8 bridesmaid dresses by Saturday. . .

She seamstressed but she’ll get it done. However her skills are only sew sew.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Why are Saturday and Sunday the strongest days of the week?

Because the rest of the days are weakdays! I’ll see myself out now

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/legendsnvrshave
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday.

Oh.... those were the days....

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bbtehbuild
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Where do the cows go on a Saturday night?

To the mooooovies!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iLccc
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Saturdays and Sundays are stronger days

Because the rest are week days

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rotimi_babalola
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2019
🚨︎ report
There is a nudist club meeting on next Saturday.

I might go if I have nothing on.

πŸ‘︎ 43
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πŸ‘€︎ u/grendel123
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2018
🚨︎ report
What does John Wick get told on a Saturday night?

Wick's almost over :/

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Redpiki
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2019
🚨︎ report
My boss called me last Saturday and said they were shorthanded and really needed someone to come in...

I replied, "Sounds like a personnel problem to me."

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lunchbockslarry
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday.

Ah. Those were the days....

πŸ‘︎ 132
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2018
🚨︎ report
what do we call Saturday and Sunday if the week passed quickly?

a weeee-kend

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/esma3ell
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2019
🚨︎ report
They grow up so fast. My son lost his first tooth Saturday night.

He got in a fight with the bouncer at a club.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2019
🚨︎ report
I heard a rumor that you lift weights only on Saturday and Sunday because Monday to Friday are weak days.
πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2018
🚨︎ report
Me, talking to my dad about babysitting my daughter: Great! We’ll drop her at about 10:30 on Saturday.

Dad: Don’t drop her! That might hurt.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kcl086
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2018
🚨︎ report
Why do baseball bats tend to break near the grip on Saturdays and Sundays?

Because it's the weekend.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheSygil
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2018
🚨︎ report
Saturday Knight Live youtu.be/JknV0OfFp6E
πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Knightovids
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2018
🚨︎ report
Saturday and Sunday are the strongest days

All the other days are just weak-days

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shurgery
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2018
🚨︎ report
My wife drove ahead of me to the Indian restaurant on Saturday.

She texted me "Hurry up they already, seated me."

I was pissed. Why couldn't she wait?

But then I got there and saw she hadn't started eating yet.

So it was a naan issue.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Abraheezee
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2018
🚨︎ report
Sleepy Saturday morning dad jokes are great

My son woke me up early Saturday to show me a picture he’d drawn of a cross.

Me (half asleep): Awesome job! Looks great.

Son: Thanks! It’s not just a cross, you know...

Me: Is it also down?

His confusion and delayed groan was music to my ears as I fell back to sleep.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HalleckG65
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2018
🚨︎ report
I asked my friend if he needed a condom on Saturday night.

He said he had it covered

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/andrewcordray
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2017
🚨︎ report
My wife was worried that the fish she bought on Friday weren't swimming together on Saturday

I told her not to worry. Saturday's not a school day.

πŸ‘︎ 84
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ACMEanvils
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2016
🚨︎ report
Did you hear the story about Saturday and Sunday?

It's got a great start but quite a weekend.

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/itsokaytofeelgood
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2017
🚨︎ report
My co-worker always wears a cat shirt on Saturdays to celebrate Caturday.

I told her I thought the idea was purrfect.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Darksoulsborne
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2017
🚨︎ report
I told my toddler it was Saturday, so I don't have to go to work today...

He indignantly replies that it is NOT Sat-ur-day, it's a hap-pee-day.

He's gonna be a great dad.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/daddy_yo
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2017
🚨︎ report
I called my grandfather one time early on a saturday morning.

I heard him pick up

Me: Oh, did I wake you up? Grandfather: No, no. I had to wake up to answer the phone anyways.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ViddiV
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2016
🚨︎ report
DadJoke comic by the great Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thirtyseven1337
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2014
🚨︎ report
Dad says on rainy Saturday:

"I sure wish the rain would keep up.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/2dadjokes4u
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2013
🚨︎ report
A classic from Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal [Comic]

This isn't my original work, but I think you of all people can best appreciate this.

http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?id=3178

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Saxoman53
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2015
🚨︎ report
I did what I thought was asking my dad if I could go out with Friends this Saturday...

On the way home from school:

Me: "Hey, my friends want to catch dinner and a movie on Saturday..."

Dad: giggles "Did you tell them they could go?"

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/soyjix
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2014
🚨︎ report
Uncle dropped this one during Saturday dinner

Hey did you guys hear that Russia is starting a new radio station?

They're calling it, "Putin on the hitz."

-_-

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/marchese51
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2014
🚨︎ report
Where do computers like to go on a saturday night?

To the disc-o!

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/proxythe1337
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2013
🚨︎ report
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday

Those were the days...

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Auralore
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2016
🚨︎ report

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