Cake Day puns
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AGoodPupper
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05
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[request] Valentine’s Day puns with the name β€œjack”
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JackyBoy37
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2019
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My friends and I had a six day pun-fest with nothing but hair jokes. imgur.com/a/DocF1
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2015
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Cake day pun!
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MaxDegauss
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2019
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My friend was throwing a β€œbisexual party” the other day. Puns ensued
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πŸ‘€︎ u/aexolthum
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2018
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Kik Team's fathers day puns imgur.com/Lb4MUc7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TiKi-r
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2015
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Looking for those St Patrick's Day puns

Give me some ammo!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/spar13
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2014
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I feel like I should tell some pi day puns.

I guess that may be a bit too irrational for me.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/132ikl
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2017
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List of Burgers Of The Day puns in Bob's Burgers bobsburgerpedia.wikia.com…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ElderCunningham
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2013
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Every day, my teacher starts her class by reading a joke from r/dadjokes, but today she is absent.

So today, a subreddit.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31
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I'm a teacher and every day I write a Dad Joke from this sub on the board. Today a student said this to me... I was about to go off... before I got the Dad Joke.

Student: "Sir, someone nutted on the floor!"

Me: *Begins to get angry* *Turns around... there's a hex nut on the floor*

Me: "Well played."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Plane_Garbage
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30
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Last Thursday my son was moping around and I told him, if you think Thursdays are sad, just wait two more days. He asked why?

Because it'll be sadder day.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hypeaze
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
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The highlight of my day
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nicknack605
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23
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There was an old man who lived by a forest. As he grew older and older, he started losing his hair, until one day, on his deathbed, he was completely bald. That day, he called his children to a meeting...

He said, "Look at my hair. It used to be so magnificent, but it's completely gone now. My hair can't be saved. But look outside at the forest. It's such a lovely forest with so many trees, but sooner or later they'll all be cut down and this forest will look as bald as my hair."

"What I want you to do..." the man continued. "Is, every time a tree is cut down or dies, plant a new one in my memory. Tell your descendants to do the same. It shall be our family's duty to keep this forest strong."

So they did.

Each time the forest lost a tree, the children replanted one, and so did their children, and their children after them.

And for centuries, the forest remained as lush and pretty as it once was, all because of one man and his re-seeding heirline...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29
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So, I read a study the other day claiming that "humans eat more bananas than monkeys".

Which - to me - sounded a bit obvious. I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/yupitsnoone
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01
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Days are numbered
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BlackBleedingGray
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21
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I was a Dad at work the other day

My coworker mentioned he needed to get a quote for 400 mice(Computer mice).

Coworker: "I need to get a quote for these mice."

Me: "I can give you a quote for those mice."

Coworker: "Yeah?"

Me: "Squeak Squeak."

Coworker: *Sigh*

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Megaman_90
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20
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After checking the delivery tracking app, my wife yelled in a fit of rage, β€œnow my package isn’t coming for another 5 days!”

I replied, now you know how I feel.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zion2199
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02
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I took a poll the other day.

Turns out 100% of people get angry when their tents fall down.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/redeyeben
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21
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I'm going to be working on my next dadjoke over the next few days. In the meantime, I'll keep u posted.

u

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06
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I almost missed my cake day!

That would have been real crumby.

Edit: thanks for the gifts! I’ve never felt so kneaded.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SufficientNarwhal
πŸ“…︎ May 21
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An apple a day keeps the doctor away

But only if you throw it hard enough

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brillmedal
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06
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It's for my cake day

Why are fish easy to weigh... Because they have their own scales

Wheres my cake?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/elbrule
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27
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Dad joke of the day

I told my daughter she was drawing her eyebrows too high.

She looked surprised.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/klimop123
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07
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My son hates it when I make Computer jokes while talking to him. One day, he took my laptop and...

...RANSOMWARE.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RoyalWar5180
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05
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What did the hat day to the other hat?

You stay here, I'll go on ahead

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jezzter88
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
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I witnessed a kidnapping at the park the other day

He woke up like 5 minutes later tho

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πŸ‘€︎ u/onemangang15
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02
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A psychic dwarf broke out of prison the other day, what did the headlines say?

There’s small medium at large

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πŸ‘€︎ u/50pciggy
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03
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A guy is walking through the woods one day when he comes across a suitcase. He takes a look inside, only to find a fox and her cubs. So he calls the ASPCA and tells the woman who answers what he’s found...

She says, β€œOh, that’s horrible. Are they moving?”

The guy replies, β€œI don’t know, but that would explain the suitcase.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30
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Riding an elevator just makes my day.

It's very uplifting!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shopcounterwill
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06
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No matter how stressful my day is, I always sleep like a baby.

I crap myself and wake up crying at least once each night.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DestroyatronMk8
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03
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Something to lighten up your day . (Credits to the creator)
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πŸ‘€︎ u/naveenit
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16
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I hear it is national cheesecake day today

But cheese and cake sound like an awful combo so I declare this my first cakeday instead

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kobykins
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30
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A farmer takes a rest on a bale of hay. β€œI love my job” he says aloud. A sheep replies β€œAll you do is boss me around all day!” The farmer, clearly upset by this statement, responds β€œWhat did you just say??” The sheep replies:

β€œYou herd me.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shawmpton
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20
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Atleast it made Sophie's day.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shampoo_and_dick
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20
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So many people these days are too judgmental

I can tell just by looking at them

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ExtendedMacaroni
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03
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My special (cake) day was beautiful...

even the cake was in tiers!

had to do a (bad) dad joke for my cake day lol

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πŸ‘€︎ u/purpleegg1
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23
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I got picked for this five-day-a-week, year-long sleep study. It pays $15,000 a month.

It’s my dream job.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OK_Compooper
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06
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One day, a father was washing a car with his son...

The son asks, "why can't we just use a sponge?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Funny-Promise956
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04
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Hey guys, my name’s Chad. I’ve been sober for 47 days now.

Not in a row or anything. Just... total.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gaaaaahhhhhhh
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21
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People keep saying today is pi day

But to me, March 14th will always be cake day.

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 14
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Tried catching fog the other day...

Mist.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/binxing
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23
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For the past few days, I wake up to see someone has dumped a bunch of LEGO blocks on my front porch.

I don’t know what to make of it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04
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My friend sat on a battery the other day.

I asked if they were shocked?

I know, I know, it’s a revolting joke.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/davidwayland
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24
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I went to a nail bar the other day...

I got hammered

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πŸ‘€︎ u/arcadianchef
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06
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December tenth is the best day of the year

I highly recommend 12/10

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πŸ‘€︎ u/freewave07
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06
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They all laughed when I told them that one day I would discover the secret of invisibility.

If only they could see me now.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29
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I compared my girlfriend to boiled pasta the other day.

It's really strained our relationship.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ev1rw
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29
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You know, I was looking at our ceiling the other day. It’s not the best...

But it’s up there.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Erbearlee
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18
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I wish i could be ugly for one day

β€˜cause being it everyday is just really sad.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madmonkreborn
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04
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I met an atheist who worked for a charity the other day..

She said it was a non-prophet organization.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sup_mike
πŸ“…︎ May 25
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I couldn’t think of a good Blue Cheese joke to share for my Cheese Day...

So instead, tell me your best and maybe even... cheesiest... joke that you’ve used for your own Blue Cheese Day!!

Edit: Apparently that’s a Cake. Damn it. I probably could have found a sweet cake joke to use.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AFUSMC74
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
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Was told a joke about a tornado the other day.

Blew me away

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πŸ‘€︎ u/karma-enigma
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24
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Happy Father’s Day

As a child I don’t think fathers realize how much we love and appreciate them and wanted to share it, even though this isn’t a joke.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/myname69420
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21
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Why did the tiler want to work on his day off?

Fear of missing grout

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πŸ‘€︎ u/2019inchnails
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08
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I went to the zoo the other day and saw a baguette in the cage

The sign said bread in captivity

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Def_Not_Alt_Acct
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27
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First day as a superhero

Villain: why is my calendar wrapped in aluminum?

Me: I foiled your plans.

[I am immediately killed]

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πŸ‘€︎ u/neospygil
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31
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I just got back from a long day of duck hunting, so I decided to put my feet up and have my favorite snack.

Cheese and quackers

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πŸ‘€︎ u/undercover723
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02
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Someone: "If you need 144 rolls of toilet paper for a 14 day quarantine you probably should've been seeing a doctor long before COVID-19"

My response: "144? That's a gross"

πŸ‘︎ 14k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jazzywaffles84
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16
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I was talking to a butcher the other day who showed me a 10 pound bratwurst

So I said "A ten pound bratwurst? I never sausage a thing!"

πŸ‘︎ 37
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CaptainAmerilard
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11
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"Egg-plant" shirt by me. Never got why the vegetable was called that until I found out that they used to be white and look like goose eggs back in the day
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πŸ‘€︎ u/stephaniehuang66
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25
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I was just reading this story about a guy who went through several tough breaks in life and couldn’t get ahead. One day he just stopped talking and his only way of communicating was through hand and body motion.......

Poor guy turned to a life of mime.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mjleak72
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01
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I was just trying to enjoy a day out on the lake. No matter where you are, you can never escape the puns.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/elanstake
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12
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What are the strongest days of the week ?

Saturday and Sunday, the rest are just weekdays

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06
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My brother-in-law, a clinical psychologist, says he is cutting back the days and hours of his work week.

In short his practice is shrinking.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bardbelle
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10
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I said to my doctor "I wake up thinking I'm a penguin, and by the end of the day I believe I'm an arctic fox."

He told me I was bipolar

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Own-Initial
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02
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I got pizza for everyone the day I started my new job as manager...

It was my first order of business

πŸ‘︎ 120
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dubaidadjokes
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28
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Had a really tough day today. I figured you would appreciate that my wife suggested I peruse r/dad jokes while she drew me a relaxing bath.

I asked her if it was going to be full color or just a sketch.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/theknight618
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29
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I told my friend his β€˜hundred eggs in five days’ diet made me deathly ill.

He told me that was an eggsaturation.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Duzervee
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31
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I got a parking ticket for being parked illegally the other day and I’ve no idea why. I mean...

The sign clearly said, β€œFine for parking”.

πŸ‘︎ 46
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20
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I have a friend named Banana. The other day we was robbing an ice cream store when the cops showed up.

Banana split.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/airwalker08
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03
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If you think Thursdays are depressing, wait two days.

It will be a sadder day.

πŸ‘︎ 16k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mistermajik2000
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05
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Someone told me that on your cake day you get free karma.

My Ma: I'm not buying you a car.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Po1sonator
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23
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Why does the dragon only sleep during the day?

He only hunts knights!

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PaintingViking
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20
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Back in the old days only the rich could afford automobiles while the common people had horses. Now only the richest have horses while almost everyone has an automobile.

My how the stables have turned.

πŸ‘︎ 43
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ZealousidealRise7
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16
🚨︎ report
There’s only one word to describe a dog’s terrible day

Ruff

πŸ‘︎ 37
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RAClef
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10
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When I die bury me on the weekend. Because the day I die will be sad,

But the funeral will be on a sadder day.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Keauxbi
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01
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A tipped my psychic an extra $20.00 the other day...

She was a very happy medium.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Campagnolo412
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25
🚨︎ report
March 30th is world bipolar day

I don’t know how I feel about this

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eggy298298
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13
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Stuck on what to get your Mum for Mother's Day?

Get her a fridge and watch her face light up as she opens it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jezzter88
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29
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What is the best time of the day, hands-down?

6:30.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sac_fo_dayz
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03
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My family and I like to sleep during the day

They are my napkin

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ashnakag3019
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02
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Isn’t it sad my cake day is in the midst of a pandemic?!

Let me share my tiers with you.

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πŸ“…︎ Jul 24
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My girlfriend usually has peanut butter toast for breakfast, but this morning we were out of bread, and she’s been grouchy all day.

I never knew she was lack-toast intolerant.

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 04
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Someone tried to hand me a baby the other day...

β€œNo thanks,” I said, β€œI am a vegetarian!”

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Parkwad
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02
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I put up a scarecrow in my garden the other day and it works so perfectly...

... it’s impeckable!

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/44pointer
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02
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If you're looking for sense these days, don't bother.

There is a national coin shortage, after all.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/stevethepirate89
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20
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First day as a pilot, I asked my co-pilot; β€œwhat are those buttons for?”

β€œTo keep your shirt closed.β€œ

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/halfblood_god
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26
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Why were the early days of history called the Dark Ages?

Because there was so many knights

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BULbyCharTOle
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
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I asked a chicken the other day who is favorite classical composer was...

He replied, "Bock!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CleverName50
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05
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My friend bought a new door bell the other day, I asked what’s it called.

β€œIsabell”,he said

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SleepyCrow07
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07
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I once worked at a place where I had to use a pay-to-cross bridge 10 times a day...

That took a toll!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
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I was walking by a yard sale the other day

I saw a radio for $1. The volume dial was broken but I knew i couldn’t turn that down.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MightyOwl121
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26
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How do pickles celebrate their cake day?

They relish the moment.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TB_II
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13
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I almost missed my cake day!

That would have been real crumby.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/spainox
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
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I tried catching fog the other day

I mist.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WhoTheF---AmI
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19
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