The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve.
It was an Apple with limited memory; just one byte. Then, everything crashed.
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︎ Dec 18 2020
Adam and Eve were the first people to..
Not read Apple terms of agreement.
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︎ Feb 11 2021
Donald Trump should drop the ball in Times Square on New Years Eve
He certainly has plenty of experience
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︎ Dec 31 2020
Well, it's that time on New Year's Eve. I'll see you all...
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︎ Jan 01 2021
Christmas Eve is special because...
...it's one of the only day where tomorrow is the present day.
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︎ Dec 25 2020
I don't know why people expect Time's Square to put on a decent New Year's Eve show.
They're always dropping the ball.
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︎ Dec 31 2020
On the eve of a record breaking cold winter night, a wife notices her husband run to the backyard with a bucket in his hand.
She grabs a cup of hot cocoa and watches through the window as he fills the bucket up with water and races from the back of the house all the way out to the front yard and out of sight. She bundles up and goes outside to get a closer look and sees that heβs cleared the snow from the sidewalk. She watches as he takes his bucket of water and pours it out on the cold concrete. Sheβs puzzled for a second and then says:
Icy, what you did there.
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︎ Nov 20 2020
Where did the keys on a computer keyboard went to celebrate new years eve
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︎ Jan 01 2021
I canβt wait for New Years Eve
So on January 1st I can say βI guess hindsight is 2020!β
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︎ Dec 11 2020
What did Adam say to Eve on December 31st and Jan 1st?
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︎ Dec 31 2020
Me: going to my friends for new year's eve celebration
My dad: See you in a year.
Ps. It happens every damn time
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︎ Dec 31 2020
I don't know what to wear to the living room New Year's Eve
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︎ Dec 31 2020
What do you call always having a date for New Year's Eve?
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︎ Dec 31 2020
My wife told me to pick up cheese dip for the New Years Eve party.
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︎ Dec 31 2020
Where can you practice multiplication tables on New Year's Eve?
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︎ Dec 31 2020
Why will people be sedated this new yearβs eve?
Because it will be 2020 24 hours to go.
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︎ Dec 18 2020
Why couldnβt Adam and Eve gamble in the garden of Eden?
Because God took away their paradise.
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︎ Sep 16 2020
Why does Eve get the blame for eating the apple?
After all, it was Adam's apple!
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︎ Jul 08 2020
After Eve did what was forbidden
Adam was very fruitstrated
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︎ May 11 2020
What did Adam said to Eve when she was feeling sleepy?
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︎ Jun 13 2020
Thought you all might enjoy the art I made for new ears eve
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︎ Jan 01 2020
Why couldn't Eve get Chicken Pox?
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︎ May 22 2020
The new year eve countdown has begun
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︎ Dec 31 2019
I really wish I had made a pun about how we celebrate New Years Eve in Times Square.
I really dropped the ball on that one.
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︎ Jan 01 2020
Santa doesn't need to pay for parking on Christmas Eve.
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︎ Dec 23 2019
A couple is walking in St Petersburg Square on Christmas Eve...
They feel some precipitation.
"I think it's raining" says the man.
"No, it's snowing" says the woman.
"Why don't we ask this communist officer?" Asks the man. "He's always right! Excuse me, officer Rudolf, is it raining or snowing?"
"Definitely raining" he says, before walking off.
The man turns to his wife with a smile. "See? Rudolf the Red knows rain, dear."
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︎ Nov 05 2016
The first computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple that barely had any memory. One byte, and everything crashed.
It probably ran on Python
Credit: u/FriendofHolySpirit
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︎ Sep 14 2018
An old couple were eating dinner on christmas eve.
The old man was cheery and happy while his wife did not share his joy.
The old man said;
"honey why're you grumpy? It's christmas!"
She said;
"but deer look! All our crops are dying if this goes on we won't survive the winter. We need a christmas miracle for that."
The old man looked outside and said;
"Honey, look a christmas miracle!"
The old lady got filled with glee and looked outside, and there was santa flying in his sleigh.
She said;
"But honey was wasn't hoping for santa in his sleigh, I was hoping for rain-dear!"
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︎ Dec 05 2019
What did Mrs. Clause say to Santa Clause on Christmas Eve?
βWatch our for the rain, dear.β
-a tour guide earlier today
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︎ Dec 17 2019
The Sonic the hedgehog trailer has dropped right on the eve of Ramadan, this is a subtle nod to the fact that Sonic's gotta go fast
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︎ May 05 2019
I cant wait for new years eve 2020
Ill put on those novelty 2020 glasses and proudly say i have 2020 vision
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︎ Dec 01 2018
Adam: Hey Eve do you love me?
Eve: of course, youβre the only one.
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︎ Jul 15 2019
Every year on New Year's Eve, when everyone's counting down the final 10 seconds to ring in the new year, I get up off the couch and stand up. I stand up and raise my left leg and just leave it raised for a little while until the countdown finishes and midnight strikes
that way I always start the new year off on the right foot
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︎ Nov 30 2018
Did you hear they are trying to get Barbara Walters to host the New Years Eve ball drop?
We will bring in the New Year with "I am Barbara Walters and this is 2020"
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︎ Apr 18 2019
Why was Eve mad at her husband?
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︎ Aug 11 2018
Eve rehearsed this new joke before telling Adam, but Adam finds it unoriginal.
Because Eveβs dropping.
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︎ Mar 18 2019
On a cloudy night on Christmas Eve
Santa asked Rudolph to let him know if it was going to rain. Rudolph sniffed the air and affirmed that it was going to rain. Surprised, Mrs. Claus asked Santa βHow did Rudolph know it is going to rain?β βBecauseβ replied Santa βRudolph the red knows rain, dear.β
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︎ Jun 04 2019
The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve.
It was an Apple, but with extremely limited memory. Just one byte. And then everything crashed.
Edits: Thanks for all the awards!
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︎ Apr 25 2020
What did Adam say to Eve the day before Christmas?
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︎ Dec 24 2020
The oldest computer was owned by Adam and Eve.
It was an Apple with very limited memory. Just 1 byte and everything crashed!
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︎ Nov 29 2020
The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve.
It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.
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︎ Aug 07 2019
The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve.
It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte.
And then everything crashed.
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︎ Dec 16 2018
What did Adam say to Eve the night before Christmas?
Itβs Christmas Eve.
(Iβll let myself out...)
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︎ Nov 08 2019
The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.
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︎ Feb 15 2018
If Christmas Eve is the day before Christmas, then what is the day after called?
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︎ Dec 27 2019
Did you know the worlds oldet computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve?
The computer was branded by apple, but it had very limited memory. It only had 1 byte and then everything crashed
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︎ Dec 04 2019
The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve.
It was an Apple with just one byte. And then it crashed.
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︎ Jan 12 2019
This yearβs New Yearβs Eve glasses will give you 20/20 vision
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︎ Jun 03 2019
What did Adam tell Eve the day before Christmas?
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︎ Mar 13 2019
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