help!! anyone know any good history valentineβs day puns?
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︎ Feb 06 2021
Cake Day puns
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︎ Jun 05 2020
My friends and I had a six day pun-fest with nothing but hair jokes.
imgur.com/a/DocF1
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︎ Jan 24 2015
My friend was throwing a βbisexual partyβ the other day. Puns ensued
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︎ Apr 28 2018
Cake day pun!
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︎ Mar 29 2019
Looking for those St Patrick's Day puns
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︎ Mar 17 2014
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︎ Oct 07 2013
I feel like I should tell some pi day puns.
I guess that may be a bit too irrational for me.
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︎ Mar 14 2017
Momma always told me "you are what you eat!" So I started eating mushrooms every day.
I wanted to become a fun guy.
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︎ Jan 07 2021
Turkey Day
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︎ Nov 25 2020
My flatmate and I are single AF so I got her flours for valentines day....
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︎ Feb 13 2021
For Valentines Day, I decided to get my wife some beads for an abacus.
It's the little things that count.
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︎ Feb 14 2021
What are the strongest days of the week?
Saturday and Sunday. The rest are weekdays.
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︎ Jan 29 2021
Why do I feel healthy on Saturdays and Sundays, and so sickly for all the other days ?
Maybe, I just have a weekend immune system.
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︎ Feb 06 2021
I ate a watch the other day
It was time consuming. I ended up going back for seconds.
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︎ Feb 14 2021
My wife texted me saying "Your great!". I responded, "No, you're great!" She said the text made her day when she got home.
I guess she really likes being corrected on her grammar.
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︎ Feb 06 2021
Text message conversation with my dad the other day, where I out-dadded him.
Dad: Give me your best knock knock joke. Or jokes. Do it when you can no rush.
Me: Does it have to be a knock knock joke or can it be any joke?
Dad: Knock Knock.
Me: Whoβs there?
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︎ Oct 09 2020
Who shaves more than once a day?
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︎ Feb 09 2021
I dream to be this commenter one day.
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︎ Oct 31 2020
I posted something on here the other day and didnβt get a single upvote
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︎ Dec 04 2020
My son asked me, βBecause of the pandemic, Iβm on the computer 12 hours a day. Is that bad?β
Me: That canβt be comfortable. Try a chair instead.
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︎ Jan 25 2021
Bear pun of the day
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︎ Jan 26 2021
The day I turned 42, my daughter walked up to me and said "happy...", and started timing on her watch. After a long silence she said...
"...40 second birthday".
I was so proud.
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︎ Sep 22 2020
Hey what are your plans for Valentine's day? -Us singles be like :
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︎ Feb 11 2021
Perhaps this is why wood floors are so popular these days
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︎ Feb 03 2021
I donβt mean to brag, but I just put a puzzle together in 1 day...
and the box said 2-4 years!
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︎ Oct 24 2020
My boss told me to have a good day ...
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︎ Jan 19 2021
My boss asked me why I only get sick on work days
I said it must be my weekend immune system
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︎ Dec 06 2020
Every day I come home and ask my dog how his day was, and every day he always gives the same answer...
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︎ Dec 26 2020
I got home one day and a book was stuck to my toddler
Me: What'd you do today?
My toddler: Nothing
Me: Are you sure about that?
My toddler: That's my story and I'm sticking to it!
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︎ Feb 11 2021
What is also known as the worst day of the year?
Sausage day!
(I woke up the other day and thought of this joke while lying on bed. I'm pretty proud of it!)
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︎ Feb 08 2021
Anyone know any new Groundhogs Day jokes?
I keep hearing the same ones over and over and over again.
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︎ Feb 02 2021
The other day I decided to install a highly decorative wall plug in my living room.
I needed a creative outlet.
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︎ Feb 13 2021
I made a cake for my cake day
The recipe said to separate two eggs, so I put one in the living room...
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︎ Jan 26 2021
What did the beaver say to his wife on Valentineβs Day?
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︎ Feb 14 2021
Now days, people don't use the name Lance very often
In medieval times, people were named Lance a lot
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︎ Nov 03 2020
Prediction: There will be a minor Baby Boom in 9 months, and then one day in 2033 we will witness the rise of
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︎ Aug 19 2020
If Thursday is a sad day but Friday is even sadder, does that make it a sadder day
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︎ Jan 19 2021
My wife just complained that I've been in the garden all day tending to the herbs.
Apparently I have way too much thyme on my hands.
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︎ Feb 02 2021
My car was wrecked by a sheep the other day.
In hindsight, the sheep probably shouldn't have been driving in the first place.
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︎ Feb 02 2021
Honest LPT: I got embarrassed the other day, and want to help other people avoid making my mistake. Now this might seem counterintuitive, but if you come up with a good dad joke MEMORIZD it and NEVER write it down. Because the moment you put it on paper...
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︎ Jan 26 2021
(First day as pilot.)
Me: (looking down nervously) "What are these buttons for?
Co pilot: "They keep your shirt closed."
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︎ Feb 11 2021
I Was Told You Might Like My Valentines Day Cards ;)
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︎ Jan 21 2021
My wife said I shouldnβt wear the same sweater two days in a row...
I told her it was a cardAGAIN.
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︎ Jan 30 2021
Guys, today was my first day in the navy and I felt so lost!
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︎ Dec 14 2020
Why do we base our work around 7 days instead of a fortnight?
Because working for a fortnight would make everyone too weak.
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︎ Feb 08 2021
How do you go a whole day without sleeping?
You just sleep at night.
My boss's kid told told him this this morning. lol
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︎ Feb 04 2021
For Valentines Day, I decided to get my girlfriend some beads for an abacus.
Itβs the little things that count.
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︎ Feb 12 2021
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