Why do I feel healthy on Saturdays and Sundays, and so sickly for all the other days ?
Maybe, I just have a weekend immune system.
Four Seasons Total Lawn Care created some good ones after the bizarre press conference Saturday such as "Lawn and Order" and "Make America Rake Again" - I don't see them using this one on their promotional materials though:
Do you know why Saturday and Sunday are considered strong days?
Because the rest are weak days.
I lost my watch at a party on Saturday...
An hour later I saw some guy stepping on it while he was harassing some woman at that party. Infuriated, I immediately went over, punched him and broke his nose. No one does that to a woman, not on my watch.
How often does Halloween fall on a Saturday?
I went to a drag race last Saturday...
I still can't believe the guy in high heels won.
I went to get a haircut on Saturday but the line outside was huge when l got there.
Then the owner came out giving free burgers and hotdogs to everybody there.
It was the best barber queue ever!
Friday was roasting saturday and sunday brutally yet they never occurred a word. Wednesday, being a harmonist, asked them why they stayed mum for which they replied, "because we are weakened in front of you guys".
Scientists have noticed that patients who have the cold feel better on Saturdays and Sundays.
It’s the weekend immune system.
(Monday: Greg) (Tuesday: Ian) (Wednesday: Greg) (Thursday: Ian) (Friday: Greg) (Saturday: Ian) (Sunday: Greg)
Its the Gregorian calendar
On Saturday, my son confronted me about why I spend time with him on only 1 day of the week, but I spend time with his sister every other day. I told him that I would take him to the movies tomorrow, and he asked if it was 'just because he asked'.
I told him, 'no, because it's Son Day'.
After my uncle had his arm amputated, he named his nub “Saturday.”
He said it was his weak end.
I'm getting fibre installed on Saturday.
It'll be nice to finally have regular internet.
Why are Saturday and Sunday the strongest days of the week?
Because the rest of the days are weakdays! I’ll see myself out now
My sister was hired to sew 8 bridesmaid dresses by Saturday. . .
She seamstressed but she’ll get it done. However her skills are only sew sew.
There is a nudist club meeting on next Saturday.
I might go if I have nothing on.
Where do the cows go on a Saturday night?
Saturdays and Sundays are stronger days
Because the rest are week days
What does John Wick get told on a Saturday night?
My boss called me last Saturday and said they were shorthanded and really needed someone to come in...
I replied, "Sounds like a personnel problem to me."
They grow up so fast. My son lost his first tooth Saturday night.
He got in a fight with the bouncer at a club.
what do we call Saturday and Sunday if the week passed quickly?
I heard a rumor that you lift weights only on Saturday and Sunday because Monday to Friday are weak days.
Why do baseball bats tend to break near the grip on Saturdays and Sundays?
Because it's the weekend.
Me, talking to my dad about babysitting my daughter: Great! We’ll drop her at about 10:30 on Saturday.
Dad: Don’t drop her! That might hurt.
My wife was worried that the fish she bought on Friday weren't swimming together on Saturday
I told her not to worry. Saturday's not a school day.
I asked my friend if he needed a condom on Saturday night.
He said he had it covered
My wife drove ahead of me to the Indian restaurant on Saturday.
She texted me "Hurry up they already, seated me."
I was pissed. Why couldn't she wait?
But then I got there and saw she hadn't started eating yet.
So it was a naan issue.
Sleepy Saturday morning dad jokes are great
My son woke me up early Saturday to show me a picture he’d drawn of a cross.
Me (half asleep): Awesome job! Looks great.
Son: Thanks! It’s not just a cross, you know...
Me: Is it also down?
His confusion and delayed groan was music to my ears as I fell back to sleep.
Did you hear the story about Saturday and Sunday?
It's got a great start but quite a weekend.
My co-worker always wears a cat shirt on Saturdays to celebrate Caturday.
I told her I thought the idea was purrfect.
I told my toddler it was Saturday, so I don't have to go to work today...
He indignantly replies that it is NOT Sat-ur-day, it's a hap-pee-day.
He's gonna be a great dad.
I called my grandfather one time early on a saturday morning.
I heard him pick up
Me: Oh, did I wake you up?
Grandfather: No, no. I had to wake up to answer the phone anyways.
DadJoke comic by the great Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Dad says on rainy Saturday:
"I sure wish the rain would keep up.
I did what I thought was asking my dad if I could go out with Friends this Saturday...
On the way home from school:
Me: "Hey, my friends want to catch dinner and a movie on Saturday..."
Dad: giggles "Did you tell them they could go?"
Why are Saturday and Sunday so strong?
Because the rest of the days are weakdays.
Do you know why Saturday and Sunday are considered strong days?
Because the rest are weak days.
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday.
Oh.... those were the days....
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday.
Ah. Those were the days....
Saturday and Sunday are the strongest days
All the other days are just weak-days
A classic from Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal [Comic]
This isn't my original work, but I think you of all people can best appreciate this.
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?id=3178
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