The time of year: Lent, itself, to Good Friday puns.
What is something that will ruin your Friday?
Realizing that it is only Thursday
I’ve been good. No ice cream on Thursday. None on Friday. None on Saturday.
I've booked a nice table for me and my wife this Friday night
I hammered her five frames to nil last time.
Was at a yardsale where someone had Tremors, Footloose, and Friday the 13th. Tonight I'm...
When I met my childhood bully last Friday, I was happy to learn he had double vision, because he always bullied me with my glasses. But then...
I got fired from my job at TGI Fridays.
At the meeting they told me 2 things;
1: in here, its always Friday
2: I am no longer required to work Fridays.
My friend asked why the stock market is closed this Friday. I looked at him, shook my head and said...
Today, Friday, February 19th, is National Prevent Plagiarism Day
As a tribute, Reddit r/Jokes will be quarantined for 24 hours.
Inmates at HMP Manchester are refusing to eat the Moroccan spiced chicken dish they're given every Friday, claiming it is being used to secretly medicate them with aggression-suppressants hidden in the sauce.
That sounds to me like one of those cons' piri piri theories.
Every Friday for dinner, I make everything deep fried
What did the guinea pig say to the hamster before leaving work on Friday?
I know it's Friday the 13th and COVID is raging, but...
Why did the naked guy go Black Friday shopping?
Because the underpants were a 100% off.
(Monday: Greg) (Tuesday: Ian) (Wednesday: Greg) (Thursday: Ian) (Friday: Greg) (Saturday: Ian) (Sunday: Greg)
Its the Gregorian calendar
Friday was roasting saturday and sunday brutally yet they never occurred a word. Wednesday, being a harmonist, asked them why they stayed mum for which they replied, "because we are weakened in front of you guys".
I was going to spend Friday night studying stinging polyps that spend major part of their lifetime attached to rocks at the bottom of the sea, but a couple pals wanted me to go bar hopping...
With friends like that, who needs anemones?
What kind of birds only appear on Friday the 13th?
Where does Friday come before Thursday?
What happens when Black Friday falls on Friday the 13th?
It’s the end of work on Friday, it’s been a long week, and all my bones are just like the capital city of the Holy Roman Empire.
What do you call an amazing Black Friday special that comes with free cake?
Have you noticed that after every Friday the 13th
Comes a Saturday the 14th?
I asked my gym instructor if he could teach me to do the splits. He said how flexible are you? I said I can’t do Fridays.
The actor that played Luke on the Disney channel original TV show “Jessie” died the day after Friday
So Saturday’s really are for the Boyce
Who had the hottest Black Friday deals this year?
I think everyone should be a little more understanding this Friday.
After all, all conversations will end on a 10-4.
I thought Friday is a sad day.
Turns out tomorrow is sadder day.
Bf is on leave Friday from the navy, need navy sex pun!
TL;DR need sex pun related to the navy!
Hey everyone! My boyfriend is coming back on leave from the navy this Friday. I am making a sign to welcome him home. I need a sex pun related to the navy. One's like "put your ship in my harbor". Thanks in advance!
"So you currently work 9 to 5, Monday through Friday," said my boss.
"That is correct," I replied.
He said, "Would you be able to work outside those hours?"
I said, "No, I might catch a cold."
Friday the 13th may be scary.
But may, May Fri 10 you more.
Did everyone have a Good Friday?
Monday: Greg. Tuesday: Ian: Wednesday: Greg. Thursday: Ian. Friday: Greg
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday.
Oh.... those were the days....
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday.
Ah. Those were the days....
Good Friday is a sad day
And tomorrow is a Saturday
Hope everyone had a GOOD Friday!
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