Geddit?

Inflation

I said "I know, they came out of the closet this morning".

That will give you a reason to get out of bed in the morning.

He’ll come around eventually.

It really came out of the purple.

Now I can't read anything.

I guess I have to keep holding it.

.. " I dunno, that's what they're fighting about "

The decision was a piece of cake.

C

"That's M'Shell on my back!"

Crew: I I Captain.

There would be mass confusion

... and as you can see, they were Wright

But when I got home all the signs were there

He just didn’t cut it.

It would be a dream job.

I have a hunch it might be me.

Because communication is key

Edit: it's from here, so please give the op credit

He has selfie steam issues.

But that’s his story, and he’s sticking to it.

The zoo told me it was bread in captivity.

The mortician asked the deceased’s wife how she would like the body dressed. He points out the man looks good in the black suit he’s already wearing. The widow however said she thought her husband always looked his best in blue, and she would really like him in a blue suit. She then hands the mortician a blank cheque and says “I don’t care how much it costs, but please have my husband in a blue suit for the viewing.” The woman returns the next day for the wake. To her delight she finds her husband dressed in a gorgeous blue suit with a subtle chalk stripe. Remarkably, the suit fit him perfectly. She says to the mortician, “whatever this costs I’m very satisfied, you did an excellent job and I’m incredibly grateful. How much did you spend?” To her astonishment the mortician presents her with her blank cheque, and he says “there’s no charge.” Shocked she replies “no really, I feel like i must compensate you for the cost of that exquisite blue suit.” “Honestly ma’am”, the mortician says, “it costs nothing, you see a diseased gentleman about your husbands size was brought in shortly after you left yesterday. He was wearing an attractive blue suit. So I asked his wife if she minded if her husband went to the grave wearing black. She had said it made no difference so long as he looked nice. So from that point on it was really just a matter of switching the heads.”

Only Juan.

Good man, terrible geologist.

It was only collecting dust.

If we don’t get support, they’ll think we’re nuts

“This takes me back.”

Cyan Aura.

But then he died.

Riceless

“I can’t believe I blew 40 bucks in there”

Hmm guess he wants to make America grate again 🤔

I paused for a second while I thought and mumbled, “It’s you. I can tell by the voice.”

Nothing, it's on the house.

Because only a Sith deals in ab salutes.

It was an Apple with limited memory; just one byte. Then, everything crashed.

"Hey, watch how far I can kick this bucket."

Geddit?