“I think we’re running out of thyme for this pie”
She definitely urned it
Otherwise, they will ...be rolling in their graves.
Between all the different types of foods and recipes, you're always going to be under a lot of pressure
And today, 4 21.
because weed be cute together
They are both cauldron.
It's about thyme.
I think I’ve developed an edible complex.
I thought hmm, there's a storm brewing
You can tun(a) guitar but cannot guitar a tuna
Me: “The right one” Wife: Evil Glare Me: “The wrong one?” Wife: Eviler Glare Me: Walks out of room
I’ve noticed I can tell when the ocean is smoking pot lately. How can I tell? When I see that the Tide is High.
Don’t know if this counts as a dad joke.
He had a very esteemed colleague.
Alpaca bowl for you
So I buried a saucepan in my yard. I hear it takes no skillet all. Just water it with Kettle One and wok away without really frying. Hopefully it’ll produce a nice stock.
I put it in the wrong place...... 3 years ago
Because doing it yourself is a paste of wine.
He got medium.
It was an edible arrangement
Cannibal Leader: "What did you do before we captured you?"
Man: "I was an editor for a newspaper"
Cannibal Leader: "Soon you will be editor-in-chief"
The steaks have never been higher.
Hot cross buns.
"Where's all the coffee?"
Coffee pot replies, "We were mugged."
He ask the barman: "What is this?"
The barman answer: "Oh this, place a dollar and if you make my horse laugh you can keep the pot."
"Fair enough" says the man "I'll give it a try" and then places a dollar in the pot
He walks in the stable and after a minute, the horse starts laughing and just can't seem to stop.
The man grabs the pot of change and leaves.
One week later, the man comes back to the bar and can still hear the horse laughing.
A new pot of change has been placed on the counter labeled: "Make my horse cry"
Man says: "Fair enough", place a dollar in the pot and walks again in the stable.
The horse stops laughing and starts crying
The man comes back in the bar and takes the pot of change.
Before he gets a chance to leave, the barman ask him: "How did you make him laugh so much?"
"Oh, very simple" says the man "I told him: My dick is bigger than yours"
"And how did you make him cry?" Ask the barman
"Even more simple, I showed him"
Mankind attained its highest form of intelligence.
Everybody needed help rolling their joints
“You can tune a guitar but you can’t tune a fish”
“What about the pot of glue”
“I knew you’d get stuck on that”
“I shall leave no tern unstoned.”
They just came by and picked up all 4 pounds.
They're both cauldron.
He will be rolling in his grave.
They're both cauldron.