A weird German kid just gave me a gold coin
Thanks for the gold, strange kinder.
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︎ Dec 25 2020
I love GOLD , but *A* is silent in it!#chem punsΖͺ(Λβ£Λ)Κβ(β
ο½β)β
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︎ Dec 26 2020
Old Gold
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︎ Oct 09 2020
Gold walks into a bar
The bartender says "AU get out of here!"
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︎ Nov 06 2020
How do gold fishes get old?
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︎ Dec 16 2020
"Thanks for the gold, kind stranger"
I said as I was taking away his dental implant.
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︎ Dec 18 2020
No need for gold. I'm fine with silver(ware).
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︎ Nov 14 2020
What do you call a dinosaur without gold?
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︎ Nov 08 2020
A youth soccer team that won gold at a tournament also stopped a thief that same day.
And he would have gotten away with it if it weren't for those medalling kids.
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︎ Dec 17 2020
i saw some joke about gold
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︎ Nov 17 2020
Thereβs a sailor who is always finding foolβs gold
We call him the iron pirate.
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︎ Dec 16 2020
Since the very beginning, man has been panning for gold and using it as trade.
Our ancestors called it the prime-ore-deal soup
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︎ Dec 20 2020
The gold standard
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︎ Nov 02 2020
What did the chemist say when he dropped a bar of gold on his foot?
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︎ Oct 29 2020
My friend Ty came first in the Beijing marathon, but wasnβt awarded a gold medal.
The Chinese refuse to acknowledge Ty won.
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︎ May 19 2020
A fog rolled in and turned my car into gold!
Must have been an alche-mist.
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︎ Nov 18 2020
I think about this way too much but I think it's comedy gold!
Mother in law to sister in law: why aren't you in pennsylvania this week
Me: because she's here at the table with us
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︎ Oct 27 2020
What do you call a gold prospector in the Southern Hemisphere?
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︎ Nov 15 2020
My uncle's friend won the Olympic gold with an epee made from a disposable thin metal sheet often used in cooking...
It was a good aluminum foil
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︎ Nov 05 2020
How do you greet gold?
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︎ Oct 29 2020
A child was slightly injured while digging for gold
Not to worry, only Minor Miner Injuries
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︎ Sep 15 2020
Why panning the river in my brain, this lil' gold nugget came to me.
What do you call a Dinosaur that knows everything?
A herd-it-before!
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︎ Sep 22 2020
I pulled a muscle digging for gold
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︎ Jul 16 2020
Just found this store by chance called Ollieβs. Aside from all the great liquidation sales, the walls are a pun gold mine! I felt it be a crime not to post pictures of it on here.
reddit.com/gallery/iij3ts
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︎ Aug 29 2020
What did the old man tell the monkey that dropped a bar of gold ?
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︎ Sep 30 2020
I was having problems with my tools while digging for gold.
They were miner technical difficulties.
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︎ Oct 01 2020
People keep bothering me at work, while I dig for gold
I'm just mining my own business
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︎ Sep 01 2020
I enjoy eating gold sprinkles with my meals.
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︎ Sep 21 2020
My friend Ty came first in the Beijing marathon, but he wasnβt given the gold medal.
The Chinese authorities refuse to recognize Ty Won.
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︎ Apr 09 2020
An underage gold digger is a miner
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︎ Jul 22 2020
Do you know what to say to get goldβs attention?
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︎ Jul 23 2020
How do you turn soup into gold?
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︎ May 12 2020
(old but gold) When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it becomes apparent...
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︎ Jul 21 2020
What did the scary old woman say when she found a gold cauldron?
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︎ Jun 26 2020
When I graduated culinary school my parents gave me a gold-plated spoon.
It was a stirring tribute.
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︎ Jul 06 2020
If you find gold in Australia, where do you look for silver?
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︎ Oct 03 2019
Old but gold.
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︎ Apr 27 2019
Comedy gold
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︎ Feb 27 2020
What do you call a kid that searches for gold in a cave?
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︎ Mar 26 2020
These puns are pure gold
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︎ Apr 11 2020
At a rock concert one time, I saw a girl with a gold spiked necklace.
I thought βwow, thatβs pretty metal.β
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︎ Jun 01 2020
This whole thread about a guy who smuggled eels is gold.
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︎ Mar 06 2020
Got some 24 carrot gold right here π
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︎ Nov 21 2019
I am helping a gold-medal winning sprinter acheive the highest level of spiritual awareness.
...I feel like The Flash, because I too, am enlightening Bolt.
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︎ May 27 2020
Cleaning your cat's litter box is a lot like sifting gold except for 1 thing
the prize is a lot crappier...literally.
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︎ May 25 2020
I'm burning a gold-scented candle.
It has a very rich aroma.
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︎ Mar 25 2020
In an alternate universe, instead of asking for whatever he touches to be gold, Midas just asked for his jokes to be made extremely hilarious.
Everything was comedy gold.
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︎ May 06 2020
I pulled a muscle digging for gold
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︎ Jul 14 2020
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