A gold ore walked into the bar...
The bartender yelled βAU, get outta hereβ
π︎ 94
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︎ Jan 16 2021
What did the chemist say when he dropped a bar of gold on his foot?
π︎ 174
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︎ Jan 14 2021
I pulled a muscle while I was digging for gold.
π︎ 157
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︎ Jan 15 2021
Old Gold
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︎ Oct 09 2020
I love GOLD , but *A* is silent in it!#chem punsΖͺ(Λβ£Λ)Κβ(β
ο½β)β
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︎ Dec 26 2020
This is gold
π︎ 16
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︎ Jan 09 2021
I just joined an online site for gold miner dating.
My first search for a mate brought no matches, but did give me plenty of prospects.
π︎ 3
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︎ Jan 24 2021
How do gold fishes get old?
π︎ 11
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︎ Dec 16 2020
No need for gold. I'm fine with silver(ware).
π︎ 39
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︎ Nov 14 2020
What do you call a dinosaur without gold?
π︎ 84
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︎ Nov 08 2020
"Thanks for the gold, kind stranger"
I said as I was taking away his dental implant.
π︎ 13
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︎ Dec 18 2020
i saw some joke about gold
π︎ 10
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︎ Nov 17 2020
A youth soccer team that won gold at a tournament also stopped a thief that same day.
And he would have gotten away with it if it weren't for those medalling kids.
π︎ 16
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︎ Dec 17 2020
My friend Ty came first in the Beijing marathon, but wasnβt awarded a gold medal.
The Chinese refuse to acknowledge Ty won.
π︎ 13k
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︎ May 19 2020
Thereβs a sailor who is always finding foolβs gold
We call him the iron pirate.
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︎ Dec 16 2020
Since the very beginning, man has been panning for gold and using it as trade.
Our ancestors called it the prime-ore-deal soup
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︎ Dec 20 2020
The gold standard
π︎ 17
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︎ Nov 02 2020
A fog rolled in and turned my car into gold!
Must have been an alche-mist.
π︎ 22
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︎ Nov 18 2020
I think about this way too much but I think it's comedy gold!
Mother in law to sister in law: why aren't you in pennsylvania this week
Me: because she's here at the table with us
π︎ 2
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︎ Oct 27 2020
What do you call a gold prospector in the Southern Hemisphere?
π︎ 2
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︎ Nov 15 2020
My uncle's friend won the Olympic gold with an epee made from a disposable thin metal sheet often used in cooking...
It was a good aluminum foil
π︎ 3
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︎ Nov 05 2020
A child was slightly injured while digging for gold
Not to worry, only Minor Miner Injuries
π︎ 8
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︎ Sep 15 2020
Why panning the river in my brain, this lil' gold nugget came to me.
What do you call a Dinosaur that knows everything?
A herd-it-before!
π︎ 3
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︎ Sep 22 2020
Just found this store by chance called Ollieβs. Aside from all the great liquidation sales, the walls are a pun gold mine! I felt it be a crime not to post pictures of it on here.
reddit.com/gallery/iij3ts
π︎ 8
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︎ Aug 29 2020
What did the old man tell the monkey that dropped a bar of gold ?
π︎ 3
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︎ Sep 30 2020
I was having problems with my tools while digging for gold.
They were miner technical difficulties.
π︎ 2
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︎ Oct 01 2020
People keep bothering me at work, while I dig for gold
I'm just mining my own business
π︎ 16
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︎ Sep 01 2020
I enjoy eating gold sprinkles with my meals.
π︎ 3
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︎ Sep 21 2020
An underage gold digger is a miner
π︎ 5
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︎ Jul 22 2020
Do you know what to say to get goldβs attention?
π︎ 15
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︎ Jul 23 2020
How do you turn soup into gold?
π︎ 110
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︎ May 12 2020
(old but gold) When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it becomes apparent...
π︎ 7
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︎ Jul 21 2020
If you find gold in Australia, where do you look for silver?
π︎ 845
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︎ Oct 03 2019
Old but gold.
π︎ 2k
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︎ Apr 27 2019
What did the scary old woman say when she found a gold cauldron?
π︎ 8
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︎ Jun 26 2020
When I graduated culinary school my parents gave me a gold-plated spoon.
It was a stirring tribute.
π︎ 3
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︎ Jul 06 2020
Comedy gold
π︎ 3
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︎ Feb 27 2020
What do you call a kid that searches for gold in a cave?
π︎ 30
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︎ Mar 26 2020
These puns are pure gold
π︎ 7
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︎ Apr 11 2020
At a rock concert one time, I saw a girl with a gold spiked necklace.
I thought βwow, thatβs pretty metal.β
π︎ 8
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︎ Jun 01 2020
Got some 24 carrot gold right here π
π︎ 48
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︎ Nov 21 2019
This whole thread about a guy who smuggled eels is gold.
π︎ 2
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︎ Mar 06 2020
Gold walks into a bar
The bartender says "AU get out of here!"
π︎ 188
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︎ Nov 06 2020
What did the chemist say when he dropped a bar of gold on his foot?
π︎ 49
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︎ Oct 29 2020
How do you greet gold?
π︎ 4
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︎ Oct 29 2020
I pulled a muscle digging for gold
π︎ 77
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︎ Jul 16 2020
I pulled a muscle digging for gold
π︎ 65
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︎ Jul 14 2020
My friend Ty came first in the Beijing marathon, but he wasnβt given the gold medal.
The Chinese authorities refuse to recognize Ty Won.
π︎ 684
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︎ Apr 09 2020
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