What makes music heavy metal?

A lead singer.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Calthropstu
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 24 2021
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Two cats are on a metal roof. Which one slides off first?

The one with the lowest ΞΌ

πŸ‘οΈŽ 23
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TheseWereThePlaces
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 28 2021
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Adjective for metal is metallic

But not so for iron which is ironic

πŸ‘οΈŽ 174
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/aryanpixel
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 21 2021
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How did the orchestra attract heavy metal fans?

With a super conductor.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 112
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/stage_directions
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 23 2021
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Did you hear about the metal shipment that was late?

It was steel to come.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/borna761
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 09 2021
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I had a bunch of metal pipes inside of me after my lung transplant.

Guess they got the wrong organ donor.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/majestic_walrus1
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 25 2021
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I listen to every type of music except heavy metal

Because heavy metals are toxic.

(I -22f- have created this joke when i was 15, I was waiting for an opportunity to disgust people with it. So here you go reddit lol)

πŸ‘οΈŽ 202
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/EucalyptusLeafJuice
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 15 2020
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What's the difference between a vacation and metal earplugs?

One is o-cation-al and the other is quiet off tin.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/shay9999
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 13 2021
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Which heavy metal band is Santa's favourite?

Sleigh-er.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 164
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DoomRulz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 25 2020
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I used to get small shocks every time I touched metal objects, but I don't anymore.

I'm just ex-static.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 07 2021
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I like to listen to music as I fall asleep, so I tuned the radio to the Metal station

I've always been a heavy sleeper.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TarakZair
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 05 2021
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Why do fairies burn when in contact with metal?

They're alloy-gic!

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MrFillywonk
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 20 2021
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I'm starting a death metal band for people with Celiac's Disease

We're called "Gluten for Punishment."

Our first single is "Bread or Alive."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 76
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/scrranger11
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 28 2020
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I’ve got a device consisting of a circular canopy of pink fish on a folding metal frame supported by a central rod, used as protection against rain.

Now I have salmonella.

(I’m sorry, it’s a fishy joke)

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/eriknobeats
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 21 2021
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Metal Fan
πŸ‘οΈŽ 23
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SalsaLoseSix
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 12 2020
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What kind of net catches metal?

A magnet.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 24
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/watercolorfiddle
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 31 2020
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I joined to pieces of metal today without nuts and bolts or welding

The whole process was riveting

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mitalily
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 06 2021
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In Yosemite, I once found a chunk of metal that was more dense in the center of it.

Hard core park ore

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/LifeIsDuff
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 26 2021
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My favorite part of the morning is the sound of pouring coffee into my metal thermos

It’s the little tings in life, ya know?

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Cold_Shogun
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 23 2021
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Why did the metal like the magnet?

Because it was attractive

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/charcolanga
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 25 2021
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2 metal workers got married....

It was a beautiful welding.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 02 2020
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i am deaf on both ears after working at the metal factory

I guess heavy metal is not good for my ears

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Slymood
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 05 2020
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A huge metal fan
πŸ‘οΈŽ 3k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/EpicBro16
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 25 2019
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Studying Chemistry at the moment, I just learned that Sulphuric acid should never be left in a metal beaker..

..It's an oxidant waiting to happen.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 49
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 19 2020
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The adjective for metal is metallic, but not so for iron, /r/Jokes/comments/jzi22z/…
πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TheEdgeOfDawn
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 24 2020
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All day I drill holes in metal and bolt them together

At first it’s boring and then it’s Riveting!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 17
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TheAvacadoBandit
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 07 2020
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I had a few doubts about buying a big metal cabinet to store all my valuables.

Turns out...it was a safe purchase.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 117
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 17 2020
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Metal fan
πŸ‘οΈŽ 3k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Blitzcrig
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 12 2019
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My uncle's friend won the Olympic gold with an epee made from a disposable thin metal sheet often used in cooking...

It was a good aluminum foil

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 05 2020
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How do you know all woodpeckers love heavy metal music?

Because they’re all head bangers. (Credit to my 11 year old).

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/IsaacPickle
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 18 2020
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Harry Houdini was allergic to the metal they used to make handcuffs...

Every time they put a pair on him, he'd break out.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 58
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Somethinggood4
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 12 2020
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All day I drill holes in metal and bolt them together. /r/Jokes/comments/j6b0uc/…
πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/alasimhere
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 07 2020
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I ordered some big metal letters.

I wanted to make a sign that said "YOU & ME". So, I ordered some big metal letters.

When they arrived, the box was very damaged. I checked if everything was there, but the iron E was lost on me.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TheSentientMeatbag
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 15 2020
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Hi a huge metal fan, I'm dad
πŸ‘οΈŽ 102
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Cyclone9175
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 09 2020
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Work pun regarding a dewar (large metal tank used for liquid nitrogen)
πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Timmy12er
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 16 2020
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The Three States of Metal Gear.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 27
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DEMSH00T3R
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 18 2020
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What have you got to add to metal to get heavy metal?

lica

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/isthisthememeplace
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 30 2020
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My wife was scratching the glass jar with a metal spoon...

It was jarring!!!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Farhan_Hyder
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 20 2020
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Huge metal fan!
πŸ‘οΈŽ 40
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/lgm225
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 07 2020
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Mike Tyson gifted little metal cups to his friends...

When they asked what it meant, he said it was a thimble of friendship!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 71
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CryptoReaper5
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 05 2020
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Rusted Metal!
πŸ‘οΈŽ 50
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/strychinine
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 18 2020
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I’m not into Metal Bands....

...just into Rubber Bands!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Ithinkhisnameis
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 24 2020
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Trash metal, anyone?
πŸ‘οΈŽ 32
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Punderants
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 30 2019
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My friend called me to say that he’s starting a new Metal band called Spinal Column.

I said, β€œCan I call you Back?”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 39
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 10 2020
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What's Santa's favourite metal band?

Sleigher.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 57
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mostlikelyarealboy
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 13 2020
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The corresponding adjective for "metal" is "metallic"

But that's not the case for "iron", which is ironic.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 45
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Silvermech_
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 24 2020
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