I listen to every type of music except heavy metal

Because heavy metals are toxic.

(I -22f- have created this joke when i was 15, I was waiting for an opportunity to disgust people with it. So here you go reddit lol)

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
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Which heavy metal band is Santa's favourite?

Sleigh-er.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DoomRulz
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
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How do you know all woodpeckers love heavy metal music?

Because they’re all head bangers. (Credit to my 11 year old).

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πŸ‘€︎ u/IsaacPickle
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2020
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What have you got to add to metal to get heavy metal?

lica

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
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Our church just replaced our giant wood pulpit for a smaller metal pulpit that is equally heavy.

We are now a heavy metal church.

We will be introducing Black Sabbath to our worship set soon.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cruckel2687
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2020
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How did Metallica get such a heavy metal sound?

It was their lead guitar

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πŸ‘€︎ u/doogdoogdoog123
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2020
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A heavy metal fan was diagnosed with coronavirus

He’s down with the sickness

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πŸ‘€︎ u/paoerfuuul
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2020
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Heavy metal band
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sonujohny
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2019
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That's some heavy metal
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πŸ‘€︎ u/XtraMavrick
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2019
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What you say when a heavy metal artist die?

Rust in peace

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πŸ‘€︎ u/General_Kylobi
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2019
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I saw Brad Pitt's brother at a heavy metal concert.

Mosh Pitt.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2019
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How to tell if music counts as heavy metal:

Look and see if they have a lead guitar.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mavet
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2017
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What would you call the sun if it was made of granite and heavy metals?

A rock star...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/code_engine
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2019
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What do you call a woman on the arm of a heavy metal guitar player?

A tattoo.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/2donutkid2
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2019
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Yesterday I was looking for heavy metal

Sadly I could not lift it

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gay_edgelord
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2019
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I just found a box of heavy metal LPs at a garage sale.

You know what they say, one man's thrash is another man's treasure!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pabrunthhu
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2016
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What kind of heavy metal do tuna fish like?

albacore

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πŸ‘€︎ u/relish-tranya
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2017
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Any guy who plays heavy metal at work…

Is office rocker.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2017
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Have you heard of the new heavy metal boyband?

In Zinc

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tkTiberius
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2015
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...Heavy Metal Toyota?

Dad: Hey, These cars these days are all plastic and can't take a single hit, they should make a toyota out of heavy metal. Me:Wut? Dad: Yeah, they could make a heavy metal toyota and call it.... "Judas Prius"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ALL-NEW_DEES-NUTS
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2015
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"I found the heavy metal."

My sister and I were cleaning our basement to prepare for a party. Half of it is the entertainment center, and the other half is open space. Our dad tends to use it as a workshop when we're not hosting parties.

As we're putting away tools and sweeping up, my sister calls out, "Hey, I found the heavy metal." I thought she meant my CDs.

When I turned around, she was holding a 2"x6" rectangle of metal. And it was heavy.

And I groaned super hard.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kayneargand
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2015
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What you say when a heavy metal artist die?

Rust in peace

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πŸ‘€︎ u/General_Kylobi
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2019
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