Dad pun alert
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tobasita
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2018
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Dad pun.
πŸ‘︎ 72
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kbro18
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2019
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The best oriental dad pun.

My dad was born in Japan. We're an average looking white family. My dad says he doesn't look Asian because when he crossed the ocean he became disoriented.

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cooterholland
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2015
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Classic dad pun
πŸ‘︎ 84
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bored_Blod
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2018
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Fries Dad Pun

You know the first french fries, wasnt actually cooked in France but in Greece...πŸ˜‚

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yeeeet99
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2019
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Bow down before 'Nice One Dad', the website gatekeeper of the worst dad puns known to man.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AspiringBiscuit
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2018
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The only good pun is a dad pun

but who am I kidding?

πŸ‘︎ 50
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Possum
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2017
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Dad Pun (r/funny)
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ShadowKillerx
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2018
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Hopefully they like her more than my Dad's puns

Driving with Dad listening to some pop music station. Meghan Trainor comes on the radio.

Dad: "Hey did you know that Muslims love Meghan Trainor?"

Me: How do you know that?

Dad: "I just heard they're Allah bout that bass."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/youngnreckless
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2015
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Listening to an accounting lecture when the professor drops some dad puns...

>Do you know where the smartest and most reasonable people work? > At the US mint, because all they do is make cents!

I thought it was over and then two minutes further into the lecture.... >Do you know where else really smart and reasonable people work? > At a perfume factory! All they do is make scents!

Now I am just sitting here posting this and trying to think of more puns...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dmack1228
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2013
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Classic Dad Pun

Driving through Groton, VT and my dad says "lets stop for some potatoes au groton (like au gratin)." then he laughed for 15 minutes

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πŸ‘€︎ u/poonroldis
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2013
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A classic Dad pun
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fair_SOTS
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2017
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Dad's puns compilation

For the record, my dad didn't say any of these. Also, they get kind of weird near the end.

My vacuum sucks, or, rather, doesn't suck.

That drawing looks sketchy. Something about it looks... shady.

Lightbulb is a smart guy. Some might even say he's bright.

"Mmm, cheesy" he says as he takes the macaroni out of the oven.

When entering a planetarium, my father mentioned how he'd like some cookies with his Milky Way.

Oreolas = cookie nipples (Couldn't really think of a way to set this one up that didn't make it even more awkward.)

"Underwear? Under there?" My dad mentioned as he put his pants away.

Edit: If you've any others, share them in the comments!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JB_Big_Bear
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2016
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Another shameless Dad Pun...

Me: "Yea, it was intense"

Dad: "Like the indians..." flahes goofy smile in anticipation for laughs

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CommonStock
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2013
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My dad literally just said this to me.

Dad: Whatcha reading?

Me: Just Reddit

Dad: Well if you already read it why are you reading it again?! (Nudges me) Get it?? Hahahaha

Me: (rolls eyes) Ha.Ha.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/subtleglow87
πŸ“…︎ May 27
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Whats the difference between a dad joke and a bad joke?

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The direction the first letter faces

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Samusftw
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05
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My 5 year old told me this today - Dad, how does a farmer count all his animals in the barn?

With a cowculator!

πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JonSnohthathurt
πŸ“…︎ May 26
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(Warning: Morbid dad joke) True Story -- My family were planning my mum's funeral. We always try to keep things light and try to stay positive, just as Mum would have it...

The funeral director was asking us what we think Mum should wear in her casket.

Mum always loved to wear sarongs (fabric wraps that go around the torso and drape downward a bit like a long skirt would), so my uncle suggested that she wear a sarong in there.

The funeral director looked a bit confused, as did some of our family members, to which my uncle added:

"What's sarong with that?"

I started laughing like an idiot. He was proud of it too. The funeral director was rather shocked. We assured her, and our more proper relatives, that Mum would've absolutely loved the joke (which is very true).

His delivery was perfect. I'll never forget the risk he took. We sometimes recall the moment as a way help cushion the blows of the grieving process.

--Edit-- I appreciate the condolences. I'm doing well and the worst is behind me and my family. But thanks :)

--Edit-- Massive thanks for all the awards and kind words. And the puns! Love 'em.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zipflop
πŸ“…︎ May 12
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Dad: "You were ado...."

Daughter: "I was adopted?"

Dad: "You were adorable as a baby!"

Daughter: "Oh!!"

Dad: "That's why we adopted you. "

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ May 29
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My friend sent me dad joke from this subreddit

I haven’t reddit yet

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Echo_The_God
πŸ“…︎ May 21
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I told my dad that home births have skyrocketed since corona; he was confused.

He thought homes were built, not born.

πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SomeoriginalAlias
πŸ“…︎ May 17
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My Dad just sent me this
πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/metroracerUK
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28
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Why did the dad tell the joke?

To get to the other sigh

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eternal_Punshine
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07
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My dad used to hit me with cameras

I still have flashbacks

πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sohayel_nafi
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30
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My Dad is hopelessly addicted to going to different hardware stores every weekend.

Every Saturday, I see him hitting new Lowe’s.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 25
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How do you know a dad jokes is a dad joke?

Because it is apparent

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Terry-Scary
πŸ“…︎ May 27
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My first Dad joke

At the last ultrasound appointment they asked me if i had any questions

"What's your return policy?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/saucyafrica
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02
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My 4 year old son’s first dad joke

What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear!

I’m sure someone else invented it but I couldn’t be prouder.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hobbitpharmacist
πŸ“…︎ May 31
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From my 9 year old son: Dad, what hand do you wipe your bum with? Me: My right hand......

Response: EEEEEEEERRRRRRRRR, I use toilet paper.

Well played, boy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tinnber
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28
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I remember asking my dad repeatedly what the acronym LGBTQ meant.

I never got a straight answer.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OMMOPOWER
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23
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Dad joke face off

I have been challenged to a dad joke face off. I need at least 20 dad jokes that will make someone laugh before I do to win a tournament. Give me your best!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/therealAjani
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01
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Dad, do you know why it’s so dark at night?

No sun

EDIT: oh my god 1k upvotes! THIS like, tripled my post karma. You guys are incredible. Much love!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Evil_Chef
πŸ“…︎ May 14
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My dad wanted to post something on Reddit and I told him there’s specific subs he would want to post on and certain ways to post

And he responded β€œoh so there’s reddiquette to it then”

(Also he’s on Reddit now so if he sees this then hi dad)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BoutTreeeFiddy
πŸ“…︎ May 04
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My Dad: Did you know that Mortal Kombat is actually based on an old Scandinavian church song?

Me: Wait, what? Really?

Dad: Yeah, a Finnish Hymn.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ May 28
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Where do dads get their jokes

A Dad-abase

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gaacars
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04
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I (Australian dad) have been playing chess remotely against my primary school pen-pal (from Czech Republic) for almost 2 decades. I finally beat him yesterday!

Czech mate!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sassaphras
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08
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You want to know where dads store all the dad jokes?

They store it in dad-a-base.

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/chihiro_yoru
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25
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I asked my Dad why he decided to buy a boat?

He said "There was a sail."

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mr_PoodlePants
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18
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A little boy asks his dad, "Do trees poop?"

The dad says, "Of course. Where do you think #2 pencils come from?"

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Navitach
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15
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Dad: in Iraq, i killed 15 people

Son: but you were a helicopter mechanic

Dad: I never said I was a good one....

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ILVShenanigans
πŸ“…︎ May 26
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How many dads does it take to found a country?

>!Forefathers.!<

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tracersasspose
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02
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Grandma Jokes anyone? Hit me with your best dad jokes for my Grandma who loves dumb jokes and needs some laughs

I hope this type of post is allowed!

I am going to visit my grandma this Tuesday to say goodbye to her. She is 87 and very ill, she is mentally still with it but in a lot of pain. She sounds at peace, I think she is just doing her best to hang on til we can get to her.

My grandma loves stupid jokes, dad jokes, puns, all that stuff. I’d love to share some laughs with her when I say goodbye. Hit me with your favorite and dumbest dad jokes and I will share the best ones with her.

Thank you Reddit fam!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/atrashx
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05
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My recently passed dads favourite vegan joke.

If I ever became vegan it would be a huge missedsteak.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Reaper0207
πŸ“…︎ May 15
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Talking to my dad about his new phone
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CoochPooch12
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07
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Spontaneous dad joke tonight....

We are ordering dinner, I asked My kiddo what she would like. She says "Can I get a Caesar wrap."

So I say "Yo-Yo, I'm MC Cesar, and I'm here to say, I got stabbed in the back, et tu, brute?"

The stare and silence was remarkable & amazing. Made even better with the high five received by the dad sitting next to us.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ass-reg-manager
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01
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Son: "Dad! I just saw two ducks at the park!"

Dad: β€œSorry, son... That’s not possible.”

Son: β€œI really did, I promise!”

Dad: β€œIt isn’t possible for two ducks to be be in the same place at the same time.”

Son: β€œWhy not?”

Dad: β€œBecause, son. It would create a pair-o-ducks!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/potatoade
πŸ“…︎ May 18
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Where do dads keep all their jokes?

In a dad-a-base

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 03
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