The hardest part for someone when coming out
Saying it with a straight face
ποΈ 216
π
οΈ Jan 27 2021
Coming soon to a theater near you
ποΈ 8k
π
οΈ Oct 26 2020
Eye did not see that coming
ποΈ 14
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οΈ Jan 14 2021
I'm scared of coming out as bi
It might end up being a pain in the ass.
ποΈ 13
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οΈ Jan 26 2021
Remake of Alien coming to cinemas near you!
ποΈ 13
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οΈ Jan 15 2021
When I get home my wife's underwear is coming straight off...
They're cutting right into my hips.
ποΈ 16
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οΈ Jan 14 2021
A guy named Vladislav kept coming after me, and all I could say wasβ¦
Vladislav,
baby don't hurt me,
don't hurt me,
no more.
ποΈ 7
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οΈ Jan 19 2021
I did knot see that one coming!
ποΈ 3k
π
οΈ Aug 25 2020
Bet choo didn't see that coming
ποΈ 42
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οΈ Dec 10 2020
Brace yourselves; Christmas puns are coming
ποΈ 39
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οΈ Dec 06 2020
I became a father today, but no dad jokes are coming to me. Iβm pretty bummed.
Luckily the neighbor hit me with a few good jokes as we got home! Cheered me right up!
ποΈ 11k
π
οΈ Jun 24 2020
ποΈ 10
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οΈ Jan 01 2021
Just my Dad coming out with Dad things...
So my brother is telling us about his girlfriends family, saying her dad is fussy with food and he doesn't eat a lot, probably because he smokes.
Dad "Does he eat his cigs?"
Then proceeds to laugh at his own joke saying that was a beauty that was.
ποΈ 3
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οΈ Dec 25 2020
Power play coming up.
ποΈ 72
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οΈ Oct 31 2020
After coming back from Switzerland
ποΈ 3
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οΈ Dec 13 2020
I feel kinda stupid and kinda proud for coming up with this (drawing on a phone is hard)
ποΈ 212
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οΈ Sep 24 2020
There's a new film about oxygen that's coming out soon, but there's no date.
I wonder when it will air.
ποΈ 27
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οΈ Nov 16 2020
One of my most proud moments was coming up with this
ποΈ 17
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οΈ Nov 13 2020
As this year is coming to a close, I find myself thinking about all the things I would have done differently.
Seems like I got 20/20 hindsight.
ποΈ 2
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οΈ Dec 31 2020
Apple just announced their new electric vehicle, the iCar, coming in 2024. Rumor is theyβre working on a self driving boat as well.
Theyβre going to call it the iAye
ποΈ 8
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οΈ Dec 24 2020
My daughter asked me, "Why are the two planets coming close together?"
"Well, you see... When two planets love each other they can come together in holy astro nomy."
ποΈ 10
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οΈ Dec 22 2020
I didn't SEE that coming..
ποΈ 4k
π
οΈ Jul 07 2020
I was stood in a field the other day wondering why the frisbee coming towards me was getting bigger
ποΈ 4
π
οΈ Dec 27 2020
When everything is coming your way...
....you're in the wrong lane.
ποΈ 16
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οΈ Dec 14 2020
My 11 year old and I were coming out of a store and someone just parked right next to our car.
She said. Our cars arenβt social distancing! You donβt want them to get ...CARona virus do you?
Proud moment.
ποΈ 2k
π
οΈ Aug 17 2020
Did you hear about the locksmith convention coming to town?
I hear they've got the keynote speaker locked up.
ποΈ 3
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οΈ Dec 06 2020
Proud of my son coming up with this joke.. Doctor: donβt eat too many apples...
Otherwise you will turn into an Iron man
ποΈ 6
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οΈ Dec 14 2020
The ad said the Hulk is coming to town.
I read it on the Bruce Banner.
ποΈ 8
π
οΈ Dec 11 2020
Could we have seen this coming?
ποΈ 614
π
οΈ Jul 14 2020
Winter is coming
ποΈ 7
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οΈ Nov 21 2020
Coming soon to a theater near you
ποΈ 16
π
οΈ Oct 26 2020
I bet you wonβt see this one coming...
ποΈ 22
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οΈ Nov 17 2020
Playboy are coming out with a new magazine, especially for married men.
Every month it's exactly the same woman.
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Dec 07 2020
I was wondering why Music was coming from my printer..
Apparently the paper was Jamming.
ποΈ 12k
π
οΈ Apr 02 2020
Local TV weatherman breaks all of his limbs but insists on coming in to work...
...tune in at 11, to see his four-casts.
ποΈ 34
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οΈ Nov 12 2020
My Aunt Penny keeps coming back to life after her cremation
I guess itβs true... a penny urned is a penny saved.
ποΈ 21
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οΈ Oct 19 2020
After checking the delivery tracking app, my wife yelled in a fit of rage, βnow my package isnβt coming for another 5 days!β
I replied, now you know how I feel.
ποΈ 298
π
οΈ Aug 02 2020
I did Nazi that coming
ποΈ 77
π
οΈ Aug 06 2020
Julius Caesar was coming out of McDonald's. Brutus asked him if he liked the burger.
Caesar nodded in the affirmative and then added "ate two, Brutus."
(My dad actually texted me this joke this morning. Iβm 31 years old.)
ποΈ 159
π
οΈ Aug 31 2020
Coming first isn't always good.
ποΈ 53
π
οΈ Aug 06 2020
Son: Dad there is a monster coming out of my closet
Dad: Don't worry son, just be supportive.
ποΈ 8
π
οΈ Oct 27 2020
Need help coming up with a good Halloween pun...
Group of peeps I hang out with are making good Halloween puns involving their user. I need one that can make use of either Vince, Vincevaleker, e11, or Valeker. Any ideas?
ποΈ 4
π
οΈ Oct 02 2020
I did nazi that one coming
ποΈ 4k
π
οΈ Feb 10 2020
Why did the ear itchiness keep coming back after being scratched?
ποΈ 7
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οΈ Oct 14 2020
ποΈ 2
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οΈ Oct 09 2020
I bet none of you will see this one coming
ποΈ 17k
π
οΈ Mar 08 2020
Nobody will see this one coming
ποΈ 150
π
οΈ Aug 18 2020
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