Never drink and derive.
      
      
        π︎ 32
         
        
        
        π
︎ Apr 06 2017
        
       
      
     
      These movies are so derivative.
      
      
        π︎ 24
         
        
        
        π
︎ Apr 21 2020
        
       
      
     
      I want to start a gas company that deals exclusively in fuel derived from dog fossils. Itβs going to be called Paw Petrol.
      
      
        π︎ 11
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jun 13 2020
        
       
      
     
      Shot on iPhone
      
      
        π︎ 3k
         
        
        
        π
︎ Sep 25 2020
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      Iβve been solving derivatives everyday, for a week and I havenβt been able to do more than 20 a day.
      I guess thatβs my limit.
        π︎ 7
         
        
        
        π
︎ Apr 15 2020
        
       
      
     
      I paid five cents for a dad joke, but it turned out to be an empty, derivative imitation, overly commercialized and lacking any real soul or talent.
      Now I want my Nickelback.
        π︎ 7
         
        
        
        π
︎ Mar 27 2020
        
       
      
     
      What's the third derivative of a cow?
      
      
        π︎ 2
         
        
        
        π
︎ Mar 24 2020
        
       
      
     
      Calculus Teacher: Itβs not the Uncle Derivative.
      Itβs the Auntie Derivative.
        π︎ 4
         
        
        
        π
︎ Dec 22 2019
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      This is little derivative
      
      
        π︎ 13
         
        
        
        π
︎ Nov 18 2018
        
       
      
     
      You might think my calculus jokes are derivative, but theyβre an integral part of me.
      
      
        π︎ 13
         
        
        
        π
︎ Oct 13 2019
        
       
      
     
      As I was walking down the street, an old man came up to me and explained all the benefits of dining on meals with mint derived from sub-shrub herbs...
      I thanked him for the sage advice but went on about my business.
        π︎ 3
         
        
        
        π
︎ Nov 27 2019
        
       
      
     
      I failed my Calculus exam because I was seated between two identical twins.
      It was hard to differentiate between them.
        π︎ 16k
         
        
        
        π
︎ Mar 21 2020
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      A first attempt to make my posts less derivative
      
      
        π︎ 10
         
        
        
        π
︎ Oct 23 2018
        
       
      
     
      What's the derivative of Amazon?
      
      
        π︎ 190
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jan 13 2018
        
       
      
     
      My friend wanted to try pizza made with goat cheese instead of cow derived.
      I didn't think it was a gouda idea.
        π︎ 4
         
        
        
        π
︎ May 07 2019
        
       
      
     
      The word 'politics' is derived from the word 'poly', meaning 'many'...
      and the word 'ticks', meaning 'blood sucking parasites'.
        π︎ 16
         
        
        
        π
︎ Sep 05 2018
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      Puns leave me numb. Mathematical puns leave me number.
      
      
        π︎ 7k
         
        
        
        π
︎ Sep 02 2019
        
       
      
     
      Why donβt calculus majors party?
      Because they can not drink and derive
        π︎ 5
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jul 18 2020
        
       
      
     
      For years, scientists have been developing a new psychotropic drug derived from queen ant pheromones...
      
      
        π︎ 16
         
        
        
        π
︎ Mar 03 2017
        
       
      
     
      Some people think puns are derivative, my Aunt & I take them pretty series-ously
      95% of conversations between me & my aunt turn into pun wars.
Enjoy!
https://i.imgur.com/aGooknb.jpg
        π︎ 4
         
        
        
        π
︎ Aug 30 2017
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      We were learning Derivatives in Calculus, and my teacher said...
      "Don't drink and Derive."
(Obviously not my OC.)
        π︎ 4
         
        
        
        π
︎ Feb 14 2017
        
       
      
     
      The word "politics" is derived from the word 'poly', meaning "many", and the word 'ticks', meaning "blood sucking parasites". (Larry Hardiman)
      
      
        π︎ 6
         
        
        
        π
︎ Dec 14 2014
        
       
      
     
      Cowculus
      
      
        π︎ 3k
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jul 01 2018
        
       
      
     
      Why can't math majors party?
      Because they can't drink and derive
        π︎ 8
         
        
        
        π
︎ Feb 03 2020
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      When taking a calculus exam, make sure you donβt sit between identical twins.
      Because itβs hard to differentiate between them.
        π︎ 1k
         
        
        
        π
︎ Dec 27 2018
        
       
      
     
      Newton: I've discovered calculus(1664)
      Leibneiz: I've discovered calculus(1670s)
Newton: Really? Seems derivative.
        π︎ 4
         
        
        
        π
︎ May 12 2020
        
       
      
     
      Math puns getting out of hand
      
      
        π︎ 155
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jul 13 2018
        
       
      
     
      There's a new rapper in my city, his name is dx.
      I don't know man, seems to me like he's a little derivative.
        π︎ 17
         
        
        
        π
︎ Mar 22 2020
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      What do you call Ancient Egyptian males that worship the sun?
      Ramen
(Joke derived from u/praetorsolaris)
        π︎ 6
         
        
        
        π
︎ Feb 09 2020
        
       
      
     
      Whatβs a mathematicianβs favourite sitcom?
      
      
        π︎ 351
         
        
        
        π
︎ Dec 12 2017
        
       
      
     
      A math teacher was almost late to his class.
      He had to derive pretty fast.
        π︎ 5
         
        
        
        π
︎ Nov 10 2018
        
       
      
     
      What language does Jello speak?
      
      
        π︎ 56
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jan 08 2017
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      What do mathematicians do in their cars?
      
      
        π︎ 92
         
        
        
        π
︎ Mar 06 2018
        
       
      
     
      Practice safe calculations
      
      
        π︎ 8
         
        
        
        π
︎ Apr 24 2019
        
       
      
     
      You know, why don't they enlist babies in the military?
      I mean, there's a reason they called it the INFANTry.
        π︎ 11
         
        
        
        π
︎ Mar 02 2017
        
       
      
     
      Why was the mathematician arrested after a night out?
      He was caught drinking and deriving.
        π︎ 561
         
        
        
        π
︎ Dec 17 2016
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      First day of calculus summer session today...
      (Right before I leave)
Mom:Be safe driving over there
Me: Ok, Mom
Dad: Be safe deriving over there
Me: Goddamnit
        π︎ 229
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jun 17 2014
        
       
      
     
      They said Calculus would be integral to my education
      but I found it a little derivative
        π︎ 8
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jun 26 2018
        
       
      
     
      Hear about the mathematician who was arrested after consuming alcohol?
      He was charged with drunk deriving.
        π︎ 10
         
        
        
        π
︎ Apr 07 2018
        
       
      
     
      I should stop leaving my calculus book at the bar.
      I've been told its wrong to drink and derive.
        π︎ 51
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jun 30 2013
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      Why don't they serve beer at a party for mathematicians?
      Because you can't drink and derive.
        π︎ 21
         
        
        
        π
︎ Oct 18 2016
        
       
      
     
      What do you get when you take the derivative of Amazon?
      
      
        π︎ 64
         
        
        
        π
︎ Apr 27 2017
        
       
      
     
      Why don't mathematicians drink.
      They can't drink and derive.
        π︎ 97
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jan 19 2017
        
       
      
     
      Calculus:
      An integral part of mathematics
        π︎ 5
         
        
        
        π
︎ Aug 14 2016
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      Calculus...
      It's an integral part of a mathematics education.
        π︎ 9
         
        
        
        π
︎ May 20 2013
        
       
      
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