Pun-ishing rant to those who think puns aren't funny, for them to use as an example.
I wanna punt all the spunky diction pundits, that attempt to expunge the joy from punsters, right in their puny footballs. They're punks who attempt to puncture holes in our word play, finding it punitive to their, self described, punticulously crafted humor. The pungent smell of their looming punishment is in the air . Now is the punctual time to place the punctuation on this punchline.
My friend doesn’t think puns are funny, so I told him my top ten to see if any could make him laugh.
Some people think puns are derivative, my Aunt & I take them pretty series-ously
95% of conversations between me & my aunt turn into pun wars.
Doctor: I think your DNA is backwards.
Just think about a calcu-forth
I think joule really likes this joke
I have been diagnosed with a rare condition that makes me think I'm an airport building.
I hope it's not terminal.
While at a restaurant, the waitress was totally flirting with me with my wife present. After she walked away, my wife said “She obviously has COVID!” “Why would you think that?” I asked.
“Because she has no taste.”
Just wondering, do you think it's alright for me to start drinking as soon as the kids are in school..
..or am I just a terrible Teacher ?
Do you think the ocean is so salty
..because it waves at the shore and the shore never waves back?
If you think Thursdays are depressing, wait until 2 more days. Why?
Because it will be a sadder day
Bilingual food puns? I THINK YES. Here’s one my fellow Canadians or French speakers might enjoy... etsy.me/3nSI0bo
Why do Americans think cow tipping is hard.
It is difficult to calculate 20% in Imperial System
>!This is a play on the word "tipping", which means....(A)Pushing a cow over.............(B)Tipping a generous amount of 20% after dinner!<
I don't think it's any faster
I think my cat is Communist
I think I might be a polygamist.
My wife has multiple personality disorder.
I think of this whenever I hear the term IV drip
My neighbor thinks I spy on her.
I would tell her otherwise, but she's in the shower right now.
Its what you do when you can't thwim
I think the girl at the Airlines check-in just threatened me.
She looked me dead in the eye and said, “Window or aisle?”
I laughed in her face and replied, “Window or you’ll what?”
What do you think would be different if men peed from their balls instead of their penis?
For starters, peanuts wouldn't have been named peanuts
Bruh can't think of a good title
I was trying to think of something funny to say about the last time I went to the pub with my mates...
But all I can think of are inn-jokes.
What does a dad do when he thinks of new jokes?
He tries them on for sighs.
Some people think Steve jobs would be a better president than Donald Trump
But you can't really compare apples to oranges.
I received all kinds of spices for my birthday, but I don't cook. I think...
I think my wife is covering my rifle collection with glue.
She's denying it, but I'm sticking to my guns.
I got a girlfriend by pretending that I play football. My friends don't think it's going to last but I don't worry.
She thinks that I'm a keeper.
Do you ever think that potatoes get mad because…
My dad said, “I think you have an iron deficiency.”
I said, “How do you know? You are not a doctor.”
He said, “Your shirt is wrinkled.”
I Made this today i think it belongs here I couldn't stop laughing while making it 😂
I think space exploration is a waste of time.
There are many better things to do for leisure than stare at a computer keyboard all day.
How do you think the unthinkable?
Despite what you'd think, witches really like to shop at Hobby Lobby.
A lot of people think that crop circles are caused by alien aircrafts.
But, I think they are done by cereal killers.
The moon is full tonight, do you think he eats too much?
I think it's time I stopped grinding my own cheese.
My wife thinks we should allow our pets to share our bed.... I finally gave in.
After 10 minutes, our goldfish finally settled down.
Whenever I think about Alexander Fleming
I come to a conclusion he must have been a fungi to work with.
You might think being injected with antivirus sounds boring
But it's really quite vaccinating
I think sex education is a great idea in schools.
I just don't think the kids should be given homework.
Do you think glass coffins will ever be a thing?
I got tired trying to think of a good posting title for this one.
What do you call it when Barry Allen thinks about his past
I think Rick Astley should've been the captain of the ship
He wouldn't have Ever Given up.
I think my sink is a little clogged
How do you think the unthinkable?
A lot of people think that crop circles are done by alien aircrafts.
But I think they are done by cereal killers.