As I put my car in reverse, I thought to myself...
When I was a kid I thought we’d all grow up to work with horses
All people ever talked about was getting a stable job...
Thought I heard someone say “Hello” in Arabic
But it was a false Salaam.
Puns aren’t the aphrodisiac I thought they were.
I got a pun calendar and thought I would share
I wrote an essay in highschool about lottery winners who ended up losing. Apparently I thought this was way funnier than it is.
Not my joke in any way but thought people might like it.
"Why didn't Elsa see a doctor for her sore throat and cough? Because a cold never bothered her anyway!" My youngest son thought of that all by himself and shared it with us during Christmas dinner!
He's a 38-year-old lawyer in Honolulu...
At first I thought breaking up with an egg would be hard...
I thought I saw Michael J Fox at my local garden centre.
I'm not sure if it was him, though, as he had his back to the fuchsias
My son asked me if I knew any good chemistry jokes as he'd just had his first chemistry class. I thought about telling him one about alkalinity...
But then I thought; 'Nah, too basic...'
I was tasked to come up with a great pun for a new launch of Microsoft Office, I thought I’d come up with a great one.
But my publisher told me that word games are not what I excel at.
Thought this pun was original. It is not.
In a recent poll people were asked what they thought ÷ means
I always thought Ruby Tuesday was by the Beatles,
turns out it's by the Cinnabon.
My wife looked at me beaming with pride and said, “Wow! I never thought our son could go so far!”
I said, “I know. This trebuchet is amazing. Go get our daughter.”
So yall know how people used wooden dentures in the 19th century? I wonder if women ever tried or thought of using the same idea to increase boob size.
That would be something, now wooden tit?
My thoughts on Floridians...
I have nothing against them. But I did run into one with a very negative Tampament.
I never thought The Bumper Book of Farming would be such a difficult bedtime read.
But it's full of words I've never even herbivore.
Last night as I lay in bed staring at the stars I thought to myself
Where the heck is the ceiling?
When I found my little son on the floor, I briefly thought a murder took place
Fortunately, it was just a kid napping.
One day, as I was walking home, someone threw a block of cheese at my head. I thought-
“That’s not very mature!”
i got this as a birthday present and thought this sub would appreciate a good music pun
Have you ever thought about what the world would be like without noses?
Nobody nose.
Also my boyfriend came up with this and I feel like this is so good I need to go take a pregnancy test to see if he’s about to be a dad.
Thought of this while on drugs.
Things you say at a celebrity brothel and at a custom tailors. " yeah, how much is Chris Hemsworth? "
Did this painting for my friend (far right) who is a huge Pittsburgh steelers fan. His favorite player is Troy Polamalu... And he likes puns. That's me in the middle.l in my favorite jumper. Thoughts???
reddit.com/gallery/kkbp9y
I thought I could hear Tubular Bells on my farm this winter...
But it was just my cold field.
Wow never thought I'd get this far
Saw this on r/unexpected, thought it was funny so here we are :) I’ll be sure to add the link to the OG post in the comments incase you wanna see it
Why was the discovery of King Tut thought to be a secret?
Because he was kept under wraps...
This guy told me he was Harry Potter’s godfather. I thought he was messing with me.
He told me he was Sirius.
Thought I just saw Shaggy in the supermarket...
I recently turned down an opportunity to open a Dominos Pizza store, because I thought it was too risky.
If one store goes down, they will all go down.
Buying a box of Duraflame logs always requires a little thought...
I have to decide if I have $20 to burn.
You thought 2020 was bad?
Wait until it turns ‘21 and can start drinking.
I thought my ballet-themed body art was unique
But then I saw someone who had a tutu tattoo, too.
Thought of this one while I was cooking last night
My left hand is clean, but, on the other hand, I did touch meat.
I thought this was pretty good
Thought y’all might enjoy these illustrated puns I found on the back of my English lit class notes from high school 🙃
I thought parfumes were useless but they do make scents.
There was a post about a teen holding his own heart in his hands after a heart transplant, I thought these comments belonged here
I just thought of this today as I was driving... I’m sorry in advance 😂 I saw this sign the other day, and it had rounded edges
It was kinda pointless...
I thought this awful year would NEVER end, but today I realized I was wrong.
Oh well, hindsight is 2020. Happy New Year!!!!
Thought I would toss this one in
Since they are filming Spider-Man 3 near my house, I thought I’d write the lead actor an orchestral piece...
I think I’ll call it “Mr. Holland’s Opus”
When Chris Hemsworth was cast by Marvel they gave him an exercise routine. When asked what he thought of it, he responded
I was Thor just thinking about it.
As I put my car in reverse, I thought to myself...
As I put my car in reverse, I thought to myself...
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