Before my surgery today, the anesthesiologist asked if I'd like to be knocked out with gas or he could just hit me over the head with a canoe paddle. So I guess it was...
...an ether/oar situation...
Remember when plastic surgery was a taboo subject?
Now you mention Botox and no one even raises an eyebrow.
My grandma has to get hip surgery.
I didn't know she would go to such great lengths to stay hip.
An undercover cop visits a doctors surgery...
...he pretends to be a patient and when the doctor it's him down he says:
DR: how can I help?
Cop: Well I'm actually here because you're in trouble
DR: Don't worry sir, most men your age suffer urine trouble!
Heart transplant is a really heart touching surgery
A friend of mine needs skin grafts for surgery, but thankfully, he doesn't need donors.
That's no skin off of my nose!
I recently had an eye surgery
It was an eye-opening experience.
I didn’t think brain surgery was ethnical...
But after a successful surgery the Dr changed my mind
BREAKING: North Korean Leader in vegetative state following surgery.
They're going to start calling him Kim Jong Un-Responsive
Doctor: Relax, David. It’s just a small surgery, don’t panic.
Me: my name isn’t David.
Doctor: I know. I’m David.
A man goes into surgery to get his Appendix removed.
Unfortunately, the doctor cut a little too deep and the man's organs began to spill out onto the operating table....
...
...
"Well, it looks you have a table of contents now" says the medical assistant.
For our first date, I had surgery with my wife
It was a great way for us to open up.
A blind man is going into surgery today for a cornea transplant.
He hopes by tomorrow, he’ll get to see everyone.
I’m thinking about opening a plastic surgery center
I will call it “Pick Your Nose”
What do you a call a T-Rex that had a surgery?
During my hip-replacement surgery, I asked my surgeon if I could inject the anesthesia myself..
Surgeon: Yeah sure. Knock yourself out.
A bar near me has an event once a week where a guy called Michael freely allows the customers to perform surgery on him...
Welcome to plastic surgery addicts anonymous.
I see a few new faces this week and I must say I’m disappointed.
Just had double knee surgery in Japan
I guess you can call them Japa-knees
Welcome to plastic surgery anonymous.
I'm seeing a lot of new faces in the crowd tonight and I just have to say I'm really disappointed
Someone recently came back from surgery after an accident with their eye. They got a new eye and a mechanical cover that can shine light while covering the eye
The doctors called it eyeLEDs
My buddy just told me he needs major surgery: he's having half his intestine removed.
(excuse my grammar that should be a semi-colon)
If anyone has any advice for cosmetic surgery that’s gone terribly wrong...
Before my surgery my anaesthetist offered to knock me out with gas or a boat paddle.
It was an ether/oar situation.
Why did the author suffer writers block after rectal surgery?
He was left with only a semicolon.
A lawyer wakes up after surgery
He asks the nurse why the blinds are drawn.
She says, "There's a fire outside and we didn't want you to think the operation was a failure."
My dad had a failing heart and refused to get surgery.
But in the end, he had a change of heart.
I went in for surgery today and the doctor found catholic zombies inside me!
He said he found an infected mass.....
My friend just told me that he has a third nipple, and he has decided to get surgery to remove it.
He really needed to get it off his chest.
After the surgery, my wife asked, "How do you feel?"
I replied, "With my nerves."
A surgeon had three surgeries assigned to the same day. After the first one he said: "One done, tumor to go"
I took a selfie after my kidney removal surgery
Having surgery with local anesthesia is a SCARRING experience
What do you call a female sex change surgery?
[NSFWish] Did you hear about the new eyelid replacement surgery for burn victims?
They use foreskin to replace them. Only side-effect is coming out a little cockeyed.
TIL that Mr. T used to be called Mr. Colton before the surgery.
What's the most common type of surgery preformed at the Lego hospital?
I cut my tongue so badly it needs surgery to fix!
I can't tell you how much it hurts!
It used to be taboo to talk about plastic surgery.
Now if you mention Botox no one raises an eyebrow.
Cosmetic surgery used to be such a taboo subject
Now you can talk about Botox and nobody raises an eyebrow.
I didn't want to have a brain surgery
But the neurosurgeon changed my mind
Cosmetic surgery used to be something that people would be embarrassed to speak about
Now you can talk about Botox and nobody raises an eyebrow.
Before my surgery, the anesthesiologist offered to knock me out with gas or a boat paddle...
It was an ether/oar situation...
Welcome to plastic surgery addicts anonymous.
I see a few new faces here this week and I must say I am very disappointed.
Before surgery the anesthetist asked if I wanted to be knocked out with gas or a boat paddle.
It was an ether/oar situation
Remember when plastic surgery was a taboo subject?
Now you mention Botox and no one raises an eyebrow.
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