After surgery, I made these two little gems in the recovery room
  1. I asked my blood type ( genuinely didn't know it). When they said A Positive, I mused, "that must explain why I'm such a positive guy.” ( got a pretty good chuckle from those in the room)

  2. They realized I didn't need oxygen and hauled the tank out of the room. I uttered, "tanks for nothing!" (got a bigger chuckle)

Not the greatest puns ever, but not bad for just coming out of general anesthetic :)

πŸ‘︎ 67
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25 2018
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Brightening my BF's recovery from surgery with Dad Jokes

Background: My boyfriend is stuck on crutches after having hip surgery and likes to sit in the recliner with his legs propped up. Since he can't move his hips, I have to lower the footrest for him to get out of the chair.

Him: Can you put my feet down so I can go relax in the bed for a while?

Me: Feet, you're stupid and useless and no one likes you!

Him giving me silence with a side of contempt while I cackle.

Laughter is the best medicine...

πŸ‘︎ 47
πŸ‘€︎ u/HuskeyG
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2014
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Is this a pun?

Recovery From Foot Surgery. Help me finish this pun

I’m really looking forward to getting back on my feet. I know once I’m healed I’ll have to hit the ground running. I have to remember to just put one foot in front of the other .....

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lostinloco
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2021
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Today I told my family that I would be going to Australia this afternoon.

Because I am going down unda’! (Anesthesia... I’m having surgery today.)

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ‘€︎ u/gabeb71
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2019
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I’m ashamed I never thought of it

True story: today at work, I was getting ready to discharge a patient from the recovery room after surgery, and I asked β€œhow do you feel?”

Without hesitation he replied β€œwith my fingers” and the old guy in the next bay chuckled and yelled β€œgood one!”

πŸ‘︎ 55
πŸ‘€︎ u/USMC0317
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2018
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Request for puns

Hi guys, I have a friend who has recently has surgery on her back to remove some cysts. I'm going to give her a get well card and I want to put as many back/cyst/surgery/recovery/etc. related puns or general sayings as I can for a goofy card that will hopefully give her some chuckles.

E.g. "You're like a CYSTer to me", "Hope you get BACK to being well soon", "You've been through enough PUNishment". Etc.

Help me Reddit you're my only hope. :)

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ‘€︎ u/Oneofakindof
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2015
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My sister was in a pretty bad car accident a few years ago

Hit head-on by a drunk driver, she broke her right wrist and forearm (compound fracture), and broke her right femur. The doctor came to talk to us after the surgery and told us she was okay. My dad asked, "will she be able to play the trumpet?" And the doctor assured us that she would make a full recovery and be able to play after the cast came off. To which my dad replies, "Wow, you're one hell of a doctor. All she could play before was the piano!"

πŸ‘︎ 339
πŸ‘€︎ u/omaha_shanks
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2013
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A symphony of groan.

At the dinner table.

Mother in law: "...he has recently had two surgeries to fuse his lower vertebrae, his recovery has been quite slow"

Me: "Well I would expect nothing less after having back to back operations."

after about 4 seconds people started leaving the table.

πŸ‘︎ 77
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mactonite
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2014
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Dadjoked my mom as she recovers from surgery (slightly gross)

My mom's been in the hospital having a difficult recovery from surgery, and she's spent the last few weeks attached to various contraptions to drain the wound site. Dad sent an update today: "Mom's been released. No wound vac, no drains of any kind. Just an island dressing. πŸ˜ƒ"

"Yay", I said. "That's 999 islands less than most people get!"

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mysphyt
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2016
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It was a good one. He cracked himself up

So yesterday I had vision correction surgery and on the ride home my mom called. My dad answered it via the car phone and my mom was asking how it went and all that. The conversation went as follows:

Mom: Hi how are you doing? How's Phil?

Dad: Hi we are good. He was in and out in about 20 minutes and they gave him a CD with only one track on it as part of the recovery package.

Mom: Really? What for?

Dad: Just to ease the anxiety he may experience shortly after the surgery. It's the song I can see clearly now.

My mom proceeded to crack up over the phone and I think she accidentally hung up as well. My girlfriend and I were laughing hysterically as well.

Knowing my dad, he couldn't wait to drop that one.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2014
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