Been meaning stop here for breakfast...everyone says I have to try their gloryholes.
I asked my wife suggestions for an exercise routine, and she said, “Why don’t you try lunges?”
I said, “That...sounds like a big step.”
At Thanksgiving this year I’m going to try to not show my disdain for my Vegan relatives.
They hate it when you have a beef with them. And last year they seemed offended when I gave them the bird.
"I always try to go the extra mile for my customers."
Said the city's most hated cab driver.
I decided to try something new and get my wife a box of red hot chili peppers for Valentines
she told me "give it away, give it away, give it away NOW" !
If a mob of clowns ever try to rob you then remember to go for their jugglers first
A man is pulled over by a cop for speeding. He tries to make some small talk. "So, how was your day?"
Me: Hey, wanna try Vietnamese for dinner tonight?
Wife: What, pho?
Me: Just to try something different.
I went to a lawyer yesterday to try and sue Starbucks for not filtering my coffee correctly.
But it turns out there were no grounds.
Never try to sleep for 48 hours straight
I went to try a new Chinese-German fusion restaurant for dinner last night.
30 minutes later, I was hungry for power.
When a toddler tries to hold the door for their parent?
A neighbor asks for your help closing a window; it's stuck open a little. You try but fail, and she says "try twisting the top." Surprised, you ask why.
I was asking my wife for some work out tips, she suggested I try lunges
I thought, that's a big step.
I always try to show my appreciation for the people at the movie theater who sell me my popcorn, soda, candy, etc.
After all, these people make a lot of concessions at work.
just witnessed a chicken try to pick up a piece of corn for 5 minutes,
I like to claim that the Greek Orthodox secretly run the world through its financial networks…For some reason people are ok with that, try putting a different religion in there and suddenly you’re a conspiracy theorist and hate criminal
Those Catholics are real sensitive sometimes
TIP FOR TODAY: Don't try to sneak popcorn in the movie theater.
They'll never let you use their microwave.
There was some controversy in the sports world this week, when they allowed some athletes to try out for the Olympic gymnastics team more than once
I thought it was just revaulting
Looking for a rush? Try camping...
Wife (just now): I'm going to try using the rest of the ground chicken to make meatballs for lunch.
Me (just now): I wish you cluck.
I always try to schedule my dentist appointments for 2:30
The receptionists don't find it as funny as I do.
I was going to try out a new spice recipe for my burgers
But I just didn't have the thyme.
When golfers jack off do they still try for the fewest strokes?
There's a food rating site for food I try to make
I asked my wife for suggestions for a new exercise routine, and she said, “Why don’t you try lunges?”
I said, “I don’t know. That seems ....like a big step.”
I asked my wife suggestions for an exercise routine. She said, “Why don’t you try lunges?”
I said, “That’s .... a big step.”
I asked my wife ideas for an exercise routine, and she said, “Why don’t you try lunges?”
I said, “That sounds....like a big step.”
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
