(Warning: Morbid dad joke) True Story -- My family were planning my mum's funeral. We always try to keep things light and try to stay positive, just as Mum would have it...
The funeral director was asking us what we think Mum should wear in her casket.
Mum always loved to wear sarongs (fabric wraps that go around the torso and drape downward a bit like a long skirt would), so my uncle suggested that she wear a sarong in there.
The funeral director looked a bit confused, as did some of our family members, to which my uncle added:
"What's sarong with that?"
I started laughing like an idiot. He was proud of it too. The funeral director was rather shocked. We assured her, and our more proper relatives, that Mum would've absolutely loved the joke (which is very true).
His delivery was perfect. I'll never forget the risk he took. We sometimes recall the moment as a way help cushion the blows of the grieving process.
--Edit--
I appreciate the condolences. I'm doing well and the worst is behind me and my family. But thanks :)
--Edit--
Massive thanks for all the awards and kind words. And the puns! Love 'em.
If you become seriously depressed, try drinking a gallon of water just before you go to bed.
That will give you a reason to get out of bed in the morning.
Guy tries to board a plane with a dead racoon. The flight attendant says, "sir, you're going to have to check that"
"Don't worry," he replies, "It's carrion."
I was going through the checkout when my card didn't work. The cashier said that I should try the card again.
I looked down at my shirt and said, "but I like my polo".
I had to explain it, but once she got it she thought it was hilarious. I'm very proud of this joke.
I try to learn from my mistakes,
but it's hard when they can't even wipe their own bum.
If your ever in a sword fight, try to chop their feet off
Then you will de-feet him
David Schwimmer of Friends once had an opportunity to try out for the Olympics but decided against it.
He didn’t want to be an Olympic Schwimmer.
LPT: If you see someone about to be attacked by a duck, don’t try to warn them.
It only makes things worse.
My buddy came up to me, asking to try out his new custard recipe...
and asked if I'd like to try it.
"Sure I would!" I replied, and enthusiastically took a bite.
Well he was immediately horrified when he looked at my reaction and asked me "Oh my gosh, is it that horrible?"
"No," I answered. "It's just a little off pudding."
My dad always said, “ Find a girl with an embarrassing tattoo and try to convince her to marry you.”
“She knows how to make bad decisions and stick by them.”
When you try your best but you don't succeed
I tried to convince my wife to try this new Indian restaurant by telling her about the free appetizer.
She told me that was a naan starter.
I'm here all week! Try the veal!
If a cat tries to jump too far, they tend to pay a price.
I want to try one of those mushrooms they found on Mars.
I bet they're out of this world.
I really want to try Kool-Aid, but...
I can’t figure out how to get 2 quarts of water in that tiny little envelope.
My mom tries to wake me up in the morning with coffee, but honestly...
What happens when you try to kick a volcano?
My friend told me he's going to try to get a large group of wolves to separate from each other.
There's a lot to unpack there.
Don't ever try to explain drones to the elderly
It just goes right over their heads
I've offered my elderly neighbour $20 to try out her stair lift.
I think she's going to take me up on it.
What do you call it when an old Australian person tries to contact you but you have to return the call?
Don’t ever go to the local mountains and try to rent skis.
You can only get snowbored.
The produce person at my grocery store said I should try this vegetable, “It’s out of this world ... radical!” he exclaimed.
In truth, it was just rad-ish.
I try to make sure I have the noisiest rifle when I go hunting.
It ensures I get a good bang for my Buck.
Don't try to eat the chickens in Minecraft.
Chemist 1 : Hey, try this new soda I like so much.
Chemist 1 : Hey, try this new soda I like so much.
Chemist 2 : takes litmus paper and dips it into the glass
Chemist 1 : You don’t trust me?
Chemist 2 : It was just a lye detector test.
My wife suggested we should try some role reversal in bed....
Saw nice guy try to help a girl with her spreadsheet
I gave a bored king a comedian to try to entertain him
He appreciated the jester
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After an unsuccessful harvest, why did the farmer decide to try a career in music?
Because he had a ton of sick beets.
Do you feel that r/puns should have a feature where someone posts an image and everyone tries to makes puns about it(the image) in the comment section?
I fall sick every time I try to journal
I must be allergic to diary
We need to uninstall 2020 and then try reinstalling it
The current version has a nasty virus
Why did it take the Roman General 10 tries to find the buried treasure?
My wife said she wanted to try and get rid of her love handles...
I said she'll look stupid without any ears 👂
Let me try uncle gravity next
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My local clothing store has an area set aside to try on clothes that is perfectly placed in the store...
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You really should try archery while blindfolded.
You don't know what you're missing.
A man tries to teach his son the cons of alcohol.
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My wife suggested we should try some role reversal in bed....
After an unsuccessful harvest, why did the farmer decide to try a career in music?
Because he had a ton of sick beets.
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