After debating with a needle

I saw his point

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πŸ‘€︎ u/maccer20
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20
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I recently visited Washington state for the first time. Much to my surprise, it ended up being a warm and sunny day when I arrived! Put on a tank top, threw on some shades, and picked up an iced latte. I took a stroll through the park near the Space Needle and had a wonderful time.

I guess you could say I was sleeveless in Seattle

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jazzywaffles84
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16
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Were you vaccinated with a phonograph needle?

Because it's been 15 minutes and you haven't stopped talking!

(This is a joke my dad said to me last night. He's 85 and in failing health so to hear him crack this joke really made me laugh & smile. Then this morning he called me saying he couldn't sleep last night because he worried the joke offended me. I told him hell no...it was hilarious! I love my dad!)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KlimRous
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2019
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I saw a communist who was up for his Hepatitis shot. He was telling stories to the doctor out of fear of needles.

The doctor said β€œQuit Stalin”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RTCOAT
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2019
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I protested doctors sticking needles in my body

I’m pretty vein about it

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PawnToG4
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2019
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Where do the needle and thread go on a hot summer's day?

The swimming sPOOL.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RCRadioCarbon
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2019
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Why did the balloon go near the needle?

He wanted to be a pop star.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NerdPapaya69
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2019
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I hate needles. They always get under my skin.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/domivic
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2019
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I used to have a cripling fear of needles

Needles to say it was a tough time of my life

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madwaste
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2019
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I don't know why I'm scared of needles.

It just gets under my skin.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/arimeffie
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2019
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I asked my anaesthetist whether I can administer the needle myself.

She said, β€œ Sure. Knock yourself out.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2018
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I was arguing with a deaf guy yesterday because he didn’t want to buy my sowing needles.

I thought I had some good points, but he wasn’t hearing it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ToroZuzuX
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2018
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My gran only talks when I buy her a needle and thread. I guess I'm her little helper...

Sew to speak.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2018
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It's the size of a needle, but it moves like a sewing machine.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hellABunk
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2018
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Aztec space needle upheaval
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mikeybthehuman
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2017
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Why did the man quit his job as a needle tester.

He just couldn’t see the point anymore.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kiwicanary
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2017
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I got a new job at the needle factory and I'm frequently late getting home

I get stuck at work a lot.

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 13 2017
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What's the appeal of round-tipped knitting needles?

They seem pointless.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nemo_sum
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2017
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Lovely needles. This packet of needles is lovely. As the saying goes: "You've got to be crewel to be kind." i.reddituploads.com/b8650…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/realmofconfusion
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2016
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What happens when you stick a needle to a unicorn balloon?

it becomes a Popcorn

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cowlbert
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2017
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Dad joked my girlfriend today when she told me she purchased some needles

Girlfriend: I bought some new needles at target earlier. Me: That's cool baby. Are they good needles or are they just....sew sew.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ohlawdjeezeus
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2014
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Bear with the ins and outs of this needle and thread joke.

You'll sew be left in stitches.

Edit: phrasing

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tatjewed
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2016
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Dadjoked my wife when she purchased 2-packs of inflating needles so my son could pump up his soccer balls.

Wife: Last time I bought these, they were packaged 3 to a pack, but now they only come 2 per pack. Me: Sheesh....talk about inflation.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EevelBob
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2014
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Needles to say nobody but him laughed

So my mom just told my dad easy on the wine.

His response was puring wine into the glass slower. Classic dad.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VIERMEX
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2013
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I told my Uncle John that Isaac Newton once stuck a darning needle behind his eyeball to test a hypothesis about optics.

He won't stop referring to him as Eye-Stick Newton.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/messenger_boy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2015
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Have you guys heard about the new see-through sewing needles?

I just don't see the point.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/UltimaGabe
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2014
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Why did the balloon go near the needle?

He wanted to be a pop star.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RottenMind62
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2018
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