Twelve individuals have been attacked in the last 48 hours.
The Police have announced that the attacker could be following some kind of pattern
They seem pointless.
My wife was teaching her best friend how to knit. She was doing quite well but for some extra encouragement I said:
"The basics are simple enough. It's when you get into the knitty gritty that things start to unravel.
Wife and friend shake their heads, so I say "Sorry, I didn't mean for my purls of wisdom to needle you."
"Still," I said, "at least I kept it short and sweet. I mean, I could've spun you a proper yarn."
Wife to friend: "Right, pass me that soddin' knitting needle...!"