I'll call it Suture Self
I told him to stop and that I would take him to the doctor for a more rofessional job. He told me he wanted to do it as he was working on his first aid merit badge for the boy scouts. So I said, "Suture self."
The nurses patched him in triage and after a long wait, the doctor called him in. "You'll take about eight stitches and be on your way." The chef replied, "I can tell you're all very busy here, so just hand me the needle and I'll be on my way." The doctor looked by turns insulted, annoyed and dismissive.
"Fine then. Suture self."
Me: No, thanks.
Nurse: Fine. Suture self...
I'm calling it Suture Self.
Suture self" I said
"Well fine, then. Suture self."
Fine. Suture self.
He replied “Okay, suture self”
"Fine," i said. "Suture self."
The second doctor responds, "Suture self."
He said, "suture self."
Fine, I said, suture self.
Fine, suture self.
...and stay on the bleeding edge of technology. But if you don't like my software, you can suture self.
She told me suture self
Me to Dad: Hey Dad! How's it going? I'm waiting for stitches. This seriously happens annually. I should buy a suture kit...
Dad to me: Crazy glue works as a surgical glue for some smaller injuries, hurts less than a suture needle, but hey... suture-self.
I told the doctor I could do the stitches on my own. He said, "Suture self."
What did the doctor say to the kid that didn't want stitches?
What did the doctor say to the man who refused stitches? ... "Suture self" any thoughts?
There was a bloodied man lying on the road. As I got closer, I could see that he had cuts all over his body. I offered to help him out, but he said that he was actually a surgeon, it wasn't as bad as it looked, and he was in good enough health and spirits to do everything on his own.
I replied "Fine, suture self."
"A know it all patient is trying to tell the surgeon how to do everything. The surgeon throws up his hands and says 'Suture yourself!'"
Cue eye rolling from me and my mom...