Eat a garlic clove with every meal to stop the Coronavirus
It won't do anything to protect you from getting sick, but people will stay six feet away
What’s a shark’s favorite meal?
I was gonna cook some garlic butter mushrooms, you know, spice up a meal
Then I realised, ain’t anybody got thyme for that.
I own a restaurant. My chef knows exactly when to add spices to any meal...
My Wing Chun instructor makes me bring him meals as part of my training.
What did the French bulldog call its favorite meal?
I wanted to buy a $30 meal for my father, my grandfather and father-in-law. I figured they'd lump em all together and charge a reduced fee...
But no. I was charged $30 a pop.
What's the most environmentally unfriendly meal?
What did the cannibal choose as his last meal
what did the cannibal request for his last meal?
I had a meal recently that was made with ketchup and mustard.
It was delicious! My condiments to the chef!
What do you get if you don't earn a full meal?
My dad says the only difference between a good meal and a good time..
is where you put the cucumber..
What do you call a toddler who can expertly select the proper whine for every meal?
What did the cannibal eat for his last meal?
Whats your nans favourite Spanish breakfast meal?
What do you call it when a waiter brings you the wrong meal?
Liam Gallagher argued that soup was the best value meal you could get, because
How does a vegan begin grace before a meal?
I made a wonderful meal last night, even the clock loved it!
It went back four seconds!
Had an awful meal at a casino in Las Vegas
The chips tasted of plastic.
How does a vegan begin grace before meals?
As I was walking down the street, an old man came up to me and explained all the benefits of dining on meals with mint derived from sub-shrub herbs...
I thanked him for the sage advice but went on about my business.
What do astronauts say before eating a meal?
Germany has unveiled a new, healthy meal plan for all its citizens
They call it the Guten Free Diet.
What do you call a meal from the moon?
Did you see they made round bails of hay illegal in Wisconsin? It’s because the cows weren’t getting a square meal.
What did the psychic order as a side for their meal?
One time I noticed a lizard stealing a meal from a very hungry frog
And I thought to myself, "What a cold blooded thing to do!"
What is a skeletons favorite meal?
What does the teddy bear say after a meal?
Why couldnt the chef finish cooking the meal?
Because he was out of thyme.
My bottle of Chardonnay just spoke to my steak! It said, "you smell great!" The steak responded, saying "you're a great vintage yourself!" The meal was delicious!
I guess the secret to a good meal is pairing food and wine that compliment each other!
Two flies are sitting down enjoying a lovely meal.
One says to the other:
"Man, this is some really good shit!"
On the instructions of my ready meal it says "Rest for 5 minutes once cooked".
But I'm not tired at all.
polynomials (algebraic expressions) are not to be confused with poly gnome meals (food for plastic gnomes)
Condom commercials should just be a short clip of a couple trying to enjoy a nice meal in public with children.
Why is Ziti such a cheap meal?
What's a cannibal's favourite cheat meal?
What is the English millionaire's favorite meal?
In college, I took many classes on the study of past events surrounding scraps of food from a meal
I even changed my major to Ort History!
What do you call it when you eat at a mall and you're satisfied by your meal?
I made a meal, with parts from every culture, using traditional Chinese methods
It was from all Woks of Life
A good meal is worth the wait.
But a good dessert is worth the weight.
What’s an Indian person’s favourite combo meal? Beeryani
What is Clark Kent's favorite meal of the day?
What's a cannibal's favorite meal?
A salad, because they cannot resist.
What did the death row prisoner request as his final meal?
I'm at the point where PM meals should not be referred to as supper or dinner, but more of a Family Meating.
What is a nuclear scientists favourite meal?
This butter came with my in-flight meal
What did the German waiter say halfway through the meal?
Cheer up. The würst is yet to come!
After our meal the waitress asked “Would you like to go tea’s”...
No ma’am, I have a full beard and my wife prefers not having facial hair.
Why does everyone apply salt to their meals?
Girlfriend asked me what meal I wanted for my birthday... She gets me
I love watching people fall down in exchange for bread-based meals
Why did the Mexican mans meal cost less?
Because of the Señors discount.
When did the dragon's meal get interrupted?
The fish & chip shop I go to still wraps up their meals in newspaper
Yesterday I got a plaice in The Sun.
My wife told me her new diet meant she could only eat foods made from almonds. Almond meal, almond milk, almond... everything.
When I heard this, I said, "but that's just nuts".
Why is it that panhandlers are only allowed to eat liquid meals?
Because beggars can’t be chewsers
What does an Australian chess player say when he finishes his meal?
I've started eating my meals from scales instead of a plate...
I'm aiming for a well balanced diet.
Doctor:Okay apart from your painful disease, can you tell me something else? Like, the last meal you had?
I asked my wife to cook me a Japanese meal for our anniversary
On the way to a nice meal with my wife discussing our choice of footwear
Wife: I wish I had worn my boots but I think the restaurant is a little dressier than that.
Me: I don’t think so... I almost wore my sandals.
Wife: That would have been vetoed.
Me: No, that would have been open toed.
What does a frog eat when it wants a hot meal?
What do you call a jester who only ate half his meal?
What do you call an electric first course meal?
The Waitress saw me and my gf were wrapping up our meals. "Y'all wanna box for your leftovers?"
"I'm not much of a boxer, but I'll wrestle you for them."
Breakfast is my favorite meal
Venus flytrap enjoying a light meal
Which meal does a speedy driver eat the most?
I came back with the food for tonight's meal.
Some people try to learn the whole layout of the human body in one go, as if they’re devouring a meal...
...but I prefer to graze anatomy.
I recently started a diet where I would have honey with each meal
turns out i couldn't stick to it
How does Mike Rowe (Host of Dirty Jobs) cook most of his meals?
My friend asked me why I eat napkins with every meal
I told him it was so that I don’t have to wipe later
What did the Australian chess player say to his waiter after eating his meal?
I had dinner in a new 5* restaurant where the meals are served in elevators.
Really taking dining to the next level
I'm moving up in the world