I ate a kids meal at McDonald's today.

His mom got really angry.

πŸ‘︎ 267
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Degtyrev
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Buzz Alvin and Meal Armstrong. reddit.com/gallery/kizca2
πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2020
🚨︎ report
I ate a kids meal at McDonald's today....

His mother was furious.

πŸ‘︎ 363
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I went to McDonald’s and ate a kid’s meal today.

His mom was pretty upset at me.

πŸ‘︎ 92
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/creator35
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
🚨︎ report
One should eat a healthy meal before going to space.
πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/suddenly_ants
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Every meal is a Happy Meal....

.....if you leave your kids at home.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2020
🚨︎ report
What is a ghost’s favourite meal?

Spookghetti

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/danuser8
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2020
🚨︎ report
What diner meal is dangerous for vampires?

Stake and eggs (sunny side up, of course)

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LaChuteQuiMarche
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend asked if i was getting an Oasis with my meal.

I said maybe

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ps_arya
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I had the perfect joke about french meals

it's unbrielievably cheesy

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/IWishIWasAGoomba
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
🚨︎ report
After finishing our meal, my date said we should have dinner again

I told her I’m too full now

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/chumbleechips
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Why da fuck did tha lion eat tha tightrope walker? He wanted er well-balanced meal!
πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2020
🚨︎ report
I've been planning meals in advance a lot lately..

..and it has given me food forethought.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I wish we had ShowerThoughts over our morning meal instead,

So we could call them Breakfast Epiphanies

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ProducerPants
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Why didn’t Han Solo like his meal

Because it was Chewy

πŸ‘︎ 131
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Centuri13
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2020
🚨︎ report
You know Luke’s favorite bbq meal?

A Tatooweenie.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ProfessorRacoon
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2020
🚨︎ report
After finishing my meal, the waiter gave me the desert menu.

"Can I ask you something?" I said.

"Certainly," he replied.

I said, "Why did you just eat my food?"

πŸ‘︎ 144
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the chess player worried towards the end of his meal in a restaurant?

Because the waiter said, "CHECK?"

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AmanMegha2909
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
🚨︎ report
When's the best day to eat a big meal?

Chewsday

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/flippantteacup
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2020
🚨︎ report
WHat's an Allosaurus's favorite meal?

Jurrasic Pork

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/UnknownFor3818
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Upon receiving his meal at a restaurant,

The practitioner uttered through a smile, β€œjust what the doctor ordered”.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Replicatar
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Eat a garlic clove with every meal to stop the Coronavirus

It won't do anything to protect you from getting sick, but people will stay six feet away

πŸ‘︎ 167
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/amnesiajune
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I enjoy eating gold sprinkles with my meals.

I like rich food.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RioZX
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
🚨︎ report
When a big giant eel takes your hand for a meal...

...that’s a moray.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/monkfish-online
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I just threw up my Travis Scott meal...

I think I’m in sicko mode

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sk80Boi
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2020
🚨︎ report
The waiter at our local Indian restaurant asked if I wanted bread before the meal.

β€œThat’s a naan-starter” I told him.

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bullhead20
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Why should you eat your meals from a weighing scale?

So you can have a balanced diet.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/D3V1L420
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Are you Tina Fey-mished? Would you care for Adele-ectable Meal? Come to Celebrit-Eats

Help me think of more celebrity food puns please!

The menu includes such dishes as:

-Marilyn Mon-roast beef -Patrick Stew-art -Tim Curry -The Cate Blan-cheddar burger -The Audrey Hep-burger -Hayden Panet-tiramisu -Leonard Nim-oysters

Add moreeeee

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tsbroesel
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2020
🚨︎ report
β€ͺMy cat really seemed to enjoy her fresh meal today...‬

It was mousewatering‬

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dubaidadjokes
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Two chefs are working on a meal, the first chef is caramelising onions when some spill out the pan, the second chef says β€œwhat happened? Onions can’t jump by themselves”

the first chef responds with β€œthey can if they’re spring onions”

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thebiunicorn
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the Nordic man say to the waiter when he was done his meal?

Thanks, I’m Finnish.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JPHarrison007
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
🚨︎ report
A Zen master walked up to a hot dog stand, and ordered himself a meal.

"Make me one with everything."

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LatinousNamous
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
🚨︎ report
After finishing my meal, the waiter gave me the dessert menu.

I said, "Why did you just eat my food ?"

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
🚨︎ report
And all the vegetables gathered around the meal that lay before them and decided to say grace..

Lettuce pray

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DanGlerrBOY89
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Enjoy your meal!
πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Couldbeurmom
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2019
🚨︎ report
What part of a meal makes you the most sleepy?

The Nap-kin.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/vZAPP
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the Australian chess player say after he finished his meal?

"Can I have the check, mate?"

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Desunator
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I brush after every meal

And the dentist thinks my hair is lovely

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/December_Soul
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the customer say to the waiter when he asked if he preferred this type of meal?

Of course

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Moony-7
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s a shark’s favorite meal?

Fish & Ships

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Daily_Vinyl
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2020
🚨︎ report
How do astronauts cook their meals?

With a Space Heater!

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Naitraen
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the Australian grandmaster say when he finished his meal?

Check, mate

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Arebee936
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I was gonna cook some garlic butter mushrooms, you know, spice up a meal

Then I realised, ain’t anybody got thyme for that.

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2020
🚨︎ report
The missus just told me airlines are selling their ready meals to the public.

Dad: They'll never take off.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bigedd
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2020
🚨︎ report
I wanted to buy a $30 meal for my father, my grandfather and father-in-law. I figured they'd lump em all together and charge a reduced fee...

But no. I was charged $30 a pop.

πŸ‘︎ 54
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2020
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.