I want to open a Chinese food buffet
It will be called "All You Can Eat and Dim Sum"
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︎ Dec 16 2020
I took all the crab legs at the all you can eat buffet
I have shellfish eating habits
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︎ Dec 02 2020
The therapist said I can get over my fear of buffets....
But first, I've got to want to help myself .
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︎ Dec 18 2020
Indian buffet
I really like Indian bread, but the buffet I went to had naan.
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︎ Dec 07 2020
This year's Thanksgiving playlist is a buffet by ear, if you will...
The main dish will be Lambchop seasoned with Red Hot Chili Peppers & Salt-n-Pepa.
Accompanied by the side dishes: The Cranberries, Korn, and Black Eyed Peas.
And for dessert we'll have Vanilla Ice..Cream..Cake.
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︎ Nov 21 2020
What do you tell a Jedi-in-training that struggles to use chopsticks at a Chinese buffet?
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︎ Sep 18 2020
I went to an "all-you-can-eat" buffet, but it was rubbish.
There was plenty of stuff that I can eat which wasn't there.
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︎ Sep 12 2020
I took my friend to an Indian buffet and he complained about the bread.
It turned out to be a Naan issue.
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︎ Sep 04 2020
Whenever we go to a buffet, I always ask my wife to get my food for me.
I just can't help myself.
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︎ Aug 14 2020
Warren Buffet
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︎ May 04 2020
At the last buffet I went to, I ate two plates.
I wish I would have found the food.
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︎ Jun 03 2020
I went to a dinner party yesterday. The hosts are chefs and made all kinds of food, buffet style. I arrived early had some hors d'oeuvres. Then I realized I was thirsty, and I wanted to try the mixed juice drink. At this point everyone else was getting food, so I walked right up and got a cup...
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︎ Sep 23 2019
What did the Hulk say when he was told every superhero loves waffles at the breakfast buffet?
Not all heroes, where crepes?
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︎ Nov 16 2019
What do you call a buffet for sheep?
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︎ Oct 11 2019
I asked a girl out on a date to a buffet tonight...
She said "no thanks, I have a lot on my plate right now."
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︎ Oct 05 2019
Local buffet was out of traditional Indian flatbread
I told them it was a naan issue.
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︎ Aug 01 2019
I went to the Chinese buffet on crab leg night and ate my fill, but they kicked me out.
They said I was being too shellfish.
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︎ May 25 2019
Ever heard of the buffet that lets you eat free if you bring your welsh cattle dog?
I hear its a real corgishborg.
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︎ Aug 26 2019
Why was the stopwatch behind when it left the buffet?
It kept going back four seconds.
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︎ May 26 2019
Warren Buffet (self-made billionaire) holds an annual conference for aspiring entrepreneurs.
When they go to lunch during the conference, they eat from the βBuffett Buffet.β
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︎ Feb 06 2019
The all you can eat seafood buffet had restrictions I didnβt know about :/
I should have read the crab clause
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︎ Apr 26 2019
I went to a $15 all-you-can-eat buffet and when I got up to refill my plate, the manager said that I wasnβt allowed to get seconds.
I said, βWhat happened to βall-you-can-eat for $15?ββ
The manager said, βThat is all you can eat for $15 dollars.β
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︎ Feb 12 2019
I changed therapists after my last one hosted a buffet party.
He came up to me and said, "Help yourself."
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︎ Dec 18 2018
I want to open a buffet restaurant with only glutenous foods...
called βall you can wheatβ
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︎ Dec 05 2018
So I went to a buffet with my dad the other day,
He couldnβt find the punch line
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︎ Oct 30 2018
Man, Warren Buffet is so goddamned rich.
Every time I go to one of his restaurants they let you eat whatever you want.
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︎ Jun 20 2018
I'm always the last one eating at the Chinese buffet
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︎ Jan 07 2015
What do you call a buffet with lot's of garlic.
Buffet The Vampire Slayer.
(Made it up at work today and got a polite chuckle.)
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︎ Apr 26 2016
Did you hear that Nashville's goaltender got thrown out of an all-you-can-eat pasta buffet during the Stanley Cup?
Turns out Pekka Rinne can wreck a penne...
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︎ Jun 19 2017
Why do people at buffets look so stressed?
They have a lot on their plate!
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︎ Apr 02 2018
Went to an Indian buffet for dinner.
I ate until there was naan left.
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︎ Dec 30 2016
Working the buffet...
Grabbing some white rice, yellow rice, and some brown rice along the way.
Daughter asks "Why are you getting some of each?"
"'Cos I'm all about ricial diversity."
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︎ Jul 02 2016
We just ate Indian buffet . . .
I'm going into a food korma.
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︎ Jul 10 2016
Got my wife at the Chinese buffet
My wife asked me to get her some soup at the buffet but there were no dumplings for the soup. I apologized for returning without the soup knowing that it, "left her wonton".
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︎ Aug 31 2014
Buffets
I hate eating at buffets; everyone there is a self serving jerk.
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︎ Feb 08 2016
Got double dad joked at a buffet.
I was standing in line when I had to sneeze. I sneezed 3 times when an old man came up to me with his wife and said
"She thinks you sneezing is funny, but it's snot." Then he said to his wife "He's just trying to make the tissue dance, he put a boogy in it." As a bonus, while I was laughing, the wife groaned and he turned and yelled, " YOU HAVE NO SENSE OF HUMOR!" Great father's day.
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︎ Jun 21 2015
Dadjoke at a buffet
After my parents and I have our drink order taken, my mother tells my dad to, "Watch my purse while I go and get my food." He replies with "Watch it do what? It just sits there." Classic dad.
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︎ Dec 17 2013
I went out with my family to a Chinese buffet for Father's Day
I saw my mom with a plate of crab legs and asked her "Where's the crab?" Dad responds with "Don't talk about me like that, I'm right here."
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︎ Jun 15 2014
What my dad always says when we go to a buffet...
Buffet stands for
Big
Ugly
Fat
Folks
Eating
Things
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︎ Mar 17 2015
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