How do astronomers organize a banquet?

They Planet

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👤︎ u/txson1836
📅︎ Dec 18 2020
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What do you call the court jester who ate too much at the king's banquet?

Fool

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👤︎ u/Sir_Pluses
📅︎ May 11 2020
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Help I'm announcing a high school soccer banquet tonight and need some dad jokes

Greeting, I'm the MC at a small high school soccer banquet this evening and need some humor help. I play rugby and my son plays soccer so any little digs I can get about that would be helpful too. We are American and I don't know any pro soccer player so please refrain on specific players. Thanks in advance.

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👤︎ u/hals318
📅︎ Mar 08 2016
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What food is forbidden at a church banquet?

Deviled Eggs

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👤︎ u/em3179
📅︎ Jun 20 2019
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At Family Weekend Banquet

My friend: Do the mashed potatoes have skin?

Me: Yeah they got skin

Dad holds out hand until I high five him

"That's what I call skin!"

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👤︎ u/Sparks0480
📅︎ Apr 25 2014
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"What does that say?"

It's been about a year since my dad passed away unexpectedly. The grief hits me in weird waves sometimes, but one of the things that ALWAYS brings a smile to my face is a joke he kept going for YEARS.

It started in line at Costco years and years ago:

Dad: [pointing over to a sign in the pharmacy] What does that say?

Me: Hearing aids.

Dad: What?

Me: HEARING AIDS

Dad: WHAT?!

A year or so later, at a charity event banquet, a police officer was speaking...

Officer: ...these funds have helped cover numerous medical expenses for those in need, including vision tests, hearing aids...

Dad: [leans over to me] What did he say?

Me: [whispers] Hearing aids.

Dad: What?

Me: Hearing aids.

Then we both burst out laughing and had to keep it together at this fancy dinner.

My dad did this for YEARS. And was masterful at waiting JUST long enough so that I had forgotten the joke and would fall for it every time. It was basically a years-long dad-joke ambush.

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👤︎ u/Steffilarueses
📅︎ Aug 05 2016
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My Dad is introducing Louie Anderson tonight and ran this "opening joke" past me....

My folks own a bar with a banquet area and Louie Anderson is performing tonight. My Dad is going to open the show with one joke that he is really excited about.

Picture him standing at the mic in a empty banquet hall, I'm standing in the middle of the room as he is "testing" the joke on me.

"A termite walks into a bar, looks around and asks "Where's the bar tender?""

...

I'm going to try and get this on video tonight.

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👤︎ u/firesatnight
📅︎ Apr 12 2014
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