Did you hear about the red-headed cookie that broke it’s leg?
Did you hear about the cookie that quietly laughs at other cookies’ drawings?
Did you hear about the dessert that got cast in the bakery’s reboot of Indiana Jones: The Temple of Doom?
Did you hear about the friends the zombies are making in heaven?
Did you hear about the Mushroom Kingdom princess that abdicated the throne to pursue the shoe repair trade?
Did you hear about the 49th state in the Union legalizing recreational marijuana?
Did you hear about the Bavarian teacher that filled up her blackboard every day?
Did you hear about the hip New York hotspots for citrus fruits?
Did you hear about the mother's sister that really likes her nieces and nephews?
Did you hear about people wagering money on a boxing match in the Arctic between a heavyweight champ and raspberries?
I saw a white, fluffy thing swinging through my local cake shop. Suspect it was a meringue-utang.
I was out driving the other day and I spotted two packets of cheese & onion crisps walking down the road. I said, “Do you want a lift”. “No thanks”, they replied, “We’re Walkers”.
I was in a cake shop the other day, they were all £5 apart from one that was £10. I asked why it was so expensive, the shop owner said “that’s maderia cake”.
Bought some cream, it said “store in a cool place”. So I left it in the Doctor Who studios.
Local ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with hundreds and thousands. Police say that he topped himself.
I used to love doughnuts, but I got bored of the whole thing.
A man says “I keep finding custard in one ear, and jelly in the other”. The doctor says “I’m afraid you are a trifle deaf”.
I bought a waffle iron the other day. Get really annoyed with wrinkled waffles.
How do you make an apple puff? Chase it around the garden
What do they call a man who abandoned his diet? DESSERTER.
Ice cream is exquisite… –what a pity it isn’t illegal.
The optimist sees the doughnut, the pessimist sees the hole, and the realist sees the calories.
Why did Eve bite the forbidden apple? Because it tasted better than Adam’s banana.
Why did the students eat their homework? Because the teacher said that it was a piece of cake.
Why do we put candles on top of a birthday cake? Because it’s too hard to put them on the bottom!
When is a birthday cake like a golf ball? When it’s been sliced.
What did the cake say to the fork? you want a piece of me?
Why was the birthday cake as hard as a rock? Because it was marble cake!
What happens when no one comes to your birthday party? You can have your cake and eat it too.
What do they serve at birthday parties in heaven? Angel food cake, of course!
A birthday greeting: For someone special as you, only ANGELFOOD would do. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Did you hear there are two suspects in Two Ton Charley’s death? BEN and JERRY.
Don’t eat too much fudge, or else you will have so much pudge you won’t be able to budge.
You know you’re a mom if… Popsicles have become a staple food.
Mexican candy makes my taste buds say “OLE!”
FORGET LOVE… I’... keep reading on reddit ➡
Too bad I cannoli eat one.
A good old piece of octopie
How much does each one cost the deer?
Everyone I ask can't remember either.
It was on the tip of my tongue, but Affogato.
But affogato 'bout it.
Cause he was stuffed.
They took him into custardy
Angle Food Cake
I said "No, that's the last thing I want"
I said, "Why did you just eat my food ?"
Because they are stuffed.
I cannoli imagine.
I guess I couldn't have my cake and heat it too.
...that in-prison mint isn't as bad as I expected!
Something about them is just off-pudding
The mascot could be General Smore man Schwarzkopf
Blood clotted cream
...because having Pi would be too irrational.
Because she was stuffed.
He was already stuffed.