Fruit pun related to wealth

I want to make a joke about a rich fruit, and so am need to choose a fruit best associated with wealth, riches having lots of money, etc..

Can any of you pun masters help me out?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kashasaurus
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2020
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I do love me some fruit puns

https://preview.redd.it/e3gbq2lopxr11.png?width=514&format=png&auto=webp&s=4a831652c3ee2a9018744b74a343b9bbbacf62c2

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Iamneverfunny
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2018
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A storefront that boasts a fruit pun, just peachy.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TreSixtyFlip
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2019
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Fruit puns intended

Does he avacado? Because If not you should let that mango

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jamesduffton
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2018
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Co-Worker and I were bored at work this morning, we wrote this. We work for a fruit store.

NASHI here Scott, we don't need your PERSIMMON to PRODUCE puns. I ain't LIME-ing, fruit puns are hard. It's a GRAPE skill to have and not at all CORNy. If BANANA (you wanna) challenge us; that can be ORANGEd, however you SHALLOT be prePEARed for us. I can GUAVAntee we will not deal with you GINGERly; if you push, APPLE; (I pull) It's not like i'm speaking LEBANESE, CUCUMBERstand?

I myself am full of puns from my head TOMATOES, as you can KIWI (See, we) have been doing this longer than you, we never skip a BEET, our abilities just climb higher PAPAYA (and higher)?.

We don't CARROT all if you're upset by this, in fact it's about THYME we asked your mother on a DATE. So don't be a DILL, we've BEAN there and done that before. So be ready to LETTUCE give you something to cry about throws onion

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πŸ‘€︎ u/iCappa
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2014
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John Bon Jovi has started an extremely strict fruit only diet...

He's living on a pear.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10
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Me: Someone told me that there’s a fruit that’s an excellent source of potassium.

Her: That’s bananas.

Me: Yeah, I was shocked too.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2020
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A woman is walking through the park when she sees a very attractive man sitting on a park bench. He's reading a book and eating some fruit out of a Tupperware container. Slowly the woman gathers the courage to go ask the man out...

So, she walks over and takes a seat next to him on the bench, turns to him and says, "Sorry to bother you. I know this may be a little forward but I would love to grab coffee with you some time."

Flattered, the man responds, "Sure... but what makes you so certain you and I would get along so well?"

"Well..." the woman says. "A couple things, actually. I noticed you were wearing an Iron Maiden t-shirt. Iron Maiden are my favorite band of all time. When they went on their reunion tour in 1999, my parents took me to see them in Cleveland. I was 12 years old and it was the first concert I ever went to. I absolutely love Iron Maiden."

The man can't believe it.

"I saw them play Cleveland in '99! First concert I ever went to on my own. My best friend Jimmy Spitz and I told our parents we were sleeping at each others' houses, snuck out, took a bus into the city and saw them play at the Plain Dealer Pavillion!"

Naturally, they're both shocked.

"If that isn't weird enough..." says the woman. "I noticed you're reading Mark Twain. I was a communications major in university and I actually wrote my thesis on Mark Twain and how he used satire as a lens to comment on current events of the time, comparing him to satirical news sources of today. He's my favorite author."

Now the man is really taken aback, "Get out of here! I was an English major in university! I specialized in 19th century American literature and this is like my fourth or fifth time reading Tom Sawyer, I absolutely love Mark Twain."

They both can't believe it...this has got to be a match made in heaven.

"Ok..." the woman says. "Well, buckle up because here's the icing on the cake. I noticed you're eating a prune. Prunes are my absolute favorite fruit. When I was a kid, my grandfather lived on a farm. He had an orchard that mainly grew apples and some lemons, but he knew how much my sister and I loved prunes so he kept a couple of plum trees. Every year at the end of the summer, we'd go up and harvest the plums with him. He'd dry them and by the time we'd go back to his place for Thanksgiving he'd always have those prunes saved just for us. They're my favorite fruit! I love prunes, you're eating a prune, this has got to be fate. What do you say?"

The man puts down his fruit and responds,

"It's a date!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
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Punny fruit name
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fensfisan
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
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What is the fruit that is green on the outside and red with black seeds on the inside, the name start with an H

Half a watermelon

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 06
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What fruit is not allowed in any Las Vegas Wedding Chapels?

Cantaloupe

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cfoxtrot21
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02
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A very young lemon strolled into an underground metro station, buying and enjoying a coffee, chatting with other fruits and eventually riding on a nice, modern train.

One could say it was a sub-lime experience.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThePokemasterYT
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10
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Ladies, if he can't appreciate your fruit jokes...

You need to let that mango.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/__teju
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2020
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Did you know that Fruit of the Loom (TM) once took Hanes(TM) to court?

It was a BRIEF case.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BastetLXIX
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2020
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Some bastard has taken my festive German fruit bread

I think it was stollen

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sgtjenno
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
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Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tiranamisu
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2020
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This might be my crowning achievement. If it's been done before, I apologize for nothing. Grape minds think alike- nope wrong fruit.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Davebelieves
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
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What is Beethoven’s favorite fruit?

Ba-nan-nan-naaa ba-nan-nan-naaa

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DontSassMeBurkis
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
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My wife is on a tropical fruit diet, the house is full of stuff

It is enough to make a mango crazy

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lolyfe-dc
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
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My wife is going through a tropical food craze. There are fruits all over the house!

It's enough to make a mango crazy!

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
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Expensive fruit. (iaio #100)
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MetropolisCourier
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
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What’s a vampires favorite fruit?

A NECK-tarine!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Greystone_86
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2020
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If your man doesn't appreciate jokes about fruit...

You need to let that mango...

😁

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JessieJade18
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
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2 fruits were struggling to get married

I guess they can't elope

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BlackShadow153
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
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I can't believe I was able to trade a piece of fruit for a measuring device.

(Banana for scale)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NeverBob
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
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I like to advertise my homemade fruit preserves at clubs.

Whenever a song comes on, I’ll hold up a jar and say, β€œThis is my jam!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2020
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Ladies, if he can’t appreciate your fruit jokes,

you need to let that mango...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThaCrimsonChinn
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2020
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Which fruit has the hardest time saying anything?

Rasp-berries!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/darkanine9
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2020
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What do you call it when you are stuck between two Fruit trucks?

Strawberry Jam

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
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What was Beethovens favorite fruit?

Ba Na Na Naaa

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Snugl-v203
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2020
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I’m obsessed with sketching pictures of fruit, and I really think I should stop.

I have to draw the lime somewhere.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2020
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There was a sale on citrus fruit at the grocery store...

It's for a lime-eted time only!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sam-A-Tron
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
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I caught a fruit fly in the air and killed it.

I'm a gnatural born killer

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πŸ‘€︎ u/joeyda3rd
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
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What was beethovenβ€˜s favorite fruit?

Banananaaaaa

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TripleGymnast
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2020
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What do you call a citrus fruit when it has been crossed with a cat?

A felime

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DiamondChocobos
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2020
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What did the thief say when he was robbing a fruit stand?

Hands up! This is a rob-berry!

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2020
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What is Beethoven's favourite fruit?

Banananana!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/4ssteroid
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
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What is a sheep's favourite fruit?

A baaahnana

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tink0079
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2020
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Fruit lol
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JDfart
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2020
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What is the most musical fruit?

A Chuck Berry

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bridgeheadprod
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2020
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My brother was caught stealing fruit last night...

Didn't know I was related to a waterfelon.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RROB2000
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
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My girlfriend started an all fruit diet yesterday, the house is FULL of the stuff.

ItsΒ enoughΒ toΒ makeΒ aΒ mangoΒ crazy!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/runew0lf
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2020
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Americans love frozen fruit so much, they wrote it into the constitution...

The 1st amendment is the right to freeze peach.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
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What fruit belongs in water fights?

A Naval Orange

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JalepenoPeppers
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2020
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Ladies, if he can’t appreciate your fruit jokes, you need...

... to let that mango.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Khyta
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2020
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