I feel really bad for cucumber seeds...
If they're unlucky, they could really get themselves in a pickle.
I made this crazy paste out of sesame seeds, it was so good I nearly ate all of it
Don’t worry I still have a tahini bit left
I bought some bird seed today
I wonder what kind of birds they will grow into.
I bought a bag of bird seed and I'm SO disappointed...
Not a single bird grew after I planted it.
I was brewing my first batch of beer with a friend and he told me to add the seed cones that are used primarily as a bittering, flavoring, and stability agents.
I needed to add some grass seeds to my lawn. The only thing I could find to keep the seeds out of my flower bed was some ceramic bunnies my wife had, so I used those as a barrier.
Please don’t make fun of my re-seeding hare line.
What did one cucumber seed say to the other?
We're in a bit of a pickle!
Have you heard about that sauce made by a guy who plants seeds outside Stockholm?
He’s calling it Sweden Sower Sauce
Why did the seed follow a German seven
Because he wanted to germinate!
I never really cared for gardening, but after planting a few seeds..
What did one cucumber seed say to the other cucumber seed?
"Damn! We're in a pickle."
Put your seeds in the bag!
An edible pale green seed of an Asian tree is very very angry with you for calling him a nut.
When the teacher asked where the apple's seeds are located, little Johnny said "the center."
She said, "that's almost core-rect."
My kids asked me why sesame seeds are on burger buns.
“Well actually, sesame seeds were the ingredient that made hamburgers popular. Yup. Sesame seeds were the secret to success... ever since then, they’ve been on a roll.”
So a man walked up to me and placed some soil, plant seeds and fertilizer on my head.
It was annoying at first, but I think it grew on me!
I sometimes drop flower seeds in my neighbors flower beds.
Did you hear about the pumpkin seeds that were drilled out, and then left alone with nothing to entertain them?
They were bored out of their gourd.
when the guys you instructed to sow seeds over your lawn also remove all the weeds from it -
Crabgrass in my lawn is always fighting to prevent good grass seed from rooting...
Guess you could say I'm caught in the middle of a turf war
A Dad joke planted as a seed, which took 17 years to flower.
Not quite as tragic, but it manifested into something which has haunted me at my job for years.
When I was a little kid learning about the world around me, my dad was naturally the font of all knowledge for me, He would answer all of little snippersmith's questions with his own unique insights and anecdotes teaching me of my surroundings with varying degrees of accuracy.
One day In a picture book, I encountered a photo of one of natures most bizarre creatures, the mighty duck billed platypus. Filled with curiosity of this bizarre creature and an Inability to read a young snippersmith asked his father what this creature was called, To which his father replied,
That's a Quackopotamous.....
As is a highly likely situation in day to day life the Platypus (or indeed the Quackopotamous), did not come into conversation for another 17 years, Until of course the Platypus came into conversation around the lunch table at a now grown up snippersmith's full time place of work.
I have not been
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Bonus question from my math test in 4th grade: What did the seed say when it grew up?
My chickens can’t eat the new seed I got for them.
The carat, a unit of mass for gemstones, and a measurement of purity for gold, takes its name from the Greek word for a carob seed from the Legume family.
No wonder they are called the Pirates of the Carob Bean.
I was originally opposed to the idea of planting a seed on my back
But it's really grown on me
When you get into an argument about seeds and nuts " I'll cashew outside how bout dah"
Out of all the melons, my favorite is the big green one which is all red inside and riddled with seeds.
After preparing my garden today, I realized my bag of seeds was eaten by squirrels.
Seedless to say, I won't be planting anything tomorrow.
What did the Mexican optometrist say when she found an opium seed in her patient's retina?
I've been germinating Sycamore and Milkweed seeds for about a month or so for bio class and today we had to present a powerpoint about it and i just had to take the opportunity.
What do you call a hot pepper with its seeds removed?
Wheat bears large seeds that stay on the stalk
because it has been selectively bread.
These seed pods that our daughter keeps tripping on suck!!
Me: yeah, they really are the pits!
While buying seeds for the garden...
"Dad, why are you buying so many peas? I don't even like peas!"
"Come on son, give peas a chance"
Thank you... I'll show myself out...
The chicken refused to eat the bird seed
They found it
Just picked up some bird seed at the store.
Wonder how long they will take to grow?
Why couldn't the sesame seed leave the casino?
Eating sunflower seeds in the car
Me: I wanted 1 and I got 1
Dad: Ask and you shall reseed
My dad found a seed in his clementine...
"But don't tell anyone," he said with a dad-twinkle in his eye, "or they'll ALL want one!"