Plant puns
πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 26
🚨︎ report
plant pun
πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2018
🚨︎ report
[Request] Plant puns for a bookmark!

Making a bookmark for part of my friends xmas gift. We're both botany students, so I'd like to make it plant related.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Capernakis
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2017
🚨︎ report
Help me making a pun names based around a samurai plant

this is for something important I just need a name for a plant who's also a samurai. Any pun name will be appreciated

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tarasque_Man
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09
🚨︎ report
My dad works in a steel plant.

He says it's very riveting

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SuryaYlp
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01
🚨︎ report
Plant-Based Pun
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dolphinville
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01
🚨︎ report
Farmers were in an all out war to decide which vegetable they would plant

It was resolved with a Peas Treaty

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DannypWooley
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13
🚨︎ report
"Egg-plant" shirt by me. Never got why the vegetable was called that until I found out that they used to be white and look like goose eggs back in the day
πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/stephaniehuang66
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25
🚨︎ report
What do you call a gestalt consciousness of plants?

A chive mind.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Vanatrix
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
🚨︎ report
What do you call an extra thick plant?

Stocky

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MatWhitehead
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04
🚨︎ report
I want to tell you about a girl who only eats plants.

You've probably never heard of herbivore.

πŸ‘︎ 48
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dulfuckyourself
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17
🚨︎ report
A plant is fine, a shrub is fine, but tree's a crowd.

I hope you scrolled past that.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bigdickcorrine
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03
🚨︎ report
You can’t plant flowers...

...if you haven’t botany

πŸ‘︎ 377
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PirateboarderLife
πŸ“…︎ May 15
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the sentry for the waste water treatment plant?

He has guard doody!

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
🚨︎ report
I received an email today from the owner of a German sausage processing plant, he said I could have it for only 1000€

I agreed and wired him the money. What’s the wurst that could happen?

πŸ‘︎ 33
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mustacius
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27
🚨︎ report
I just found out what animal’s been getting into my avocado plants...

It was a guaca-mole.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/1ndigo__
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21
🚨︎ report
My wife told me to watch her plants when I sprayed the weed killer.

I've been watching them for an hour now and I don't see what's so interesting about them.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LetterZee
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05
🚨︎ report
My wife accidentally killed one of her plants by over watering...

I told here I guess it wasn't the right Thyme for it.

Yes, it was a Thyme plant.

(My son is too young to understand how great her eye roll was so I need recognition somewhere)

πŸ‘︎ 67
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Itsmydouginabox
πŸ“…︎ May 28
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the plant that looked like a stone?

It was a shamrock.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yorkshirenation
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09
🚨︎ report
Plant-based meats are very popular now, but this didn't go well for vampires.

Thousands have died from a wooden steak.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/azwarners
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16
🚨︎ report
A nuclear power plant put up a new sign outside that read, "Post your positive reviews of us on social media!"

They were just fission for compliments.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19
🚨︎ report
Plant/Music Puns

I am looking for some sort or plant/gardening puns from famous song lyrics for a class assignment such as:

You can grow your own way

-or-

Don't grow so close to me

Any help?

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fornicaked
πŸ“…︎ May 24
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you plant a Donut?

A pastree.

πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ‘€︎ u/s0apyjam
πŸ“…︎ May 16
🚨︎ report
Apparently, there's a big market for an expensive breed of cow that only eats marijuana plants.

The steaks are high.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JuicyPotato21
πŸ“…︎ May 27
🚨︎ report
How are you going to plant any flowers

If you haven’t botany?

πŸ‘︎ 63
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πŸ‘€︎ u/betchhxx
πŸ“…︎ May 14
🚨︎ report
I can never find my plant...

Because it always leaves.

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lowlz13
πŸ“…︎ May 21
🚨︎ report
I named my plants as Odds.

Turns out my neighbour too named his plants as Odds.

Water the odds.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RayInRed
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06
🚨︎ report
I wanted to plant every herb in my garden.

But I just don't have the thyme.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Datolite7
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03
🚨︎ report
I want to tell you all about a girl that only ate plants.

You've probably never heard of herbivore.

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mcsweepin
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2019
🚨︎ report
Since I moved to a plant based diet I lost touch with the fun guys.

Mushroom is not a plant

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hamadaeleleimy
πŸ“…︎ May 27
🚨︎ report
Why did the man hate working at the recycling plant

Because it was soda pressing

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BULbyCharTOle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07
🚨︎ report
Why does the plant not laugh at the soil's joke?

Because the soil had no humus

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Arandomredittuser
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07
🚨︎ report
Why do plants propagate so easily? Because they have a lot of stem cells.
πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SanjisHere
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27
🚨︎ report
There is a very common and seamingly innocuous plant. But if you sit under it for 5 minutes, you’re dead.

A water lily

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrBully74
πŸ“…︎ May 14
🚨︎ report
I met a girl on tinder whose bio said she used to work at a meat packing plant and that she'd heard all the jokes before...

So I asked her out on a date for the weekend but to let me know by Friday if she had to can salami.

(Cancel on me)

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15
🚨︎ report
You can't plant flowers

if you haven't botany

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nathann4288
πŸ“…︎ May 13
🚨︎ report
What do plants take for their headaches?

Mulchtrin

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Astrotter81
πŸ“…︎ May 21
🚨︎ report
(Me reading to my five-year-old) The leopard slug eats dead plants and fungi, but also hunts other slugs.

(Five-year-old) I'm a fun guy, so they would eat me.

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/legisleducator
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30
🚨︎ report
I want to tell you all about this girl who only eats plants...

You’ve probably never heard of herbivore.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Slammogram
πŸ“…︎ May 01
🚨︎ report
Why couldn't my neighbor plant any flowers?

They hadn't botany

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lilAKoof
πŸ“…︎ May 16
🚨︎ report
TIL that many plants are transgendered

because there is less stygma to stamen.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dyspaereunia
πŸ“…︎ May 16
🚨︎ report
There was a businessman who owned a hydroelectric power plant, and was slowly going bankrupt.

When he asked for money from his friends and family, they refused,

as it wasn't their dam business

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/23Silicon
πŸ“…︎ May 07
🚨︎ report
What do you call a plant that eats only people?

A humanitarian.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/atruthtellingliar
πŸ“…︎ May 12
🚨︎ report
Construction Dadjoke: Our Sewage Treatment Plant supplier is missing

In his last email he said "I remain at your disposal for any concerns".

Couldn't find him there this morning. I hope he's ok.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/andrei178
πŸ“…︎ May 07
🚨︎ report
What man made plant can take care of it self into adulthood

Self raising flower.

I'll see myself out now.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jesusloveskfc
πŸ“…︎ May 12
🚨︎ report
A power plant blows up near a aquarium...

and I had to be the one to tell my boss about the mutated eels. After I gathered all my courage, I said to him

β€œSir, the eels have fur all over them and are humanoid too!”

My boss looked so surprised, and was silent for a minute or two. Finally, he asked me

β€œFur-eel man?”

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 24
🚨︎ report
Me and my son came across a fake Bamboo plant.

Looks like we got Bamboozled.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mickiokai
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30
🚨︎ report
Napoleon was visiting a friend at his new estate. The friends great pride was his lavatory which was a big room with pottet plants, beautiful tapestries and carpets. When Napoleon saw this he was gobsmacked and exclaimed "What a loo!"
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/operasmurf
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23
🚨︎ report
These two dinosaurs were walking one day and they came across another dinosaur they had never seen before, eating plants. One says "Who is that?!" and the other replies...

"I dunno. I've never seen herbivore!"

πŸ‘︎ 69
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KingKaikster
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26
🚨︎ report
During this quarantine, I’ve made friends with the plants I’m trying to grow.

They’re my buds.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03
🚨︎ report
On Earth Day I was going to plant a tree

But I planted my butt on the couch.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lexmaster02
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22
🚨︎ report
Have you heard about that sauce made by a guy who plants seeds outside Stockholm?

He’s calling it Sweden Sower Sauce

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DarkDragon1025
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20
🚨︎ report
What do you call it when a Marsupial on drugs makes you a delicious drink out of hot water and plants?

High Koala Tea

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cuffbox
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07
🚨︎ report
There is a lady who lives down the street from me who only eats plants.

You’ve probably never heard of herbivore.

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PrimalMusk
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03
🚨︎ report
The preachers are up in arms about Trump's plan to add more hydroelectric power plants.

They are worried about the damnation.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25
🚨︎ report
What do you say to a plant with weird-looking roots?

WATER THOSE

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Torgor_
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31
🚨︎ report
Is what they say your a plant with emotions
πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jokesniff
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2019
🚨︎ report
My grandma was famous for her delicious strawberries. She made me promise that when she died I would plant strawberries over her grave so everyone could visit and enjoy them. I fulfilled her wish.

She’s dead and berried.

πŸ‘︎ 408
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πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2019
🚨︎ report
I don't trust companies that plant trees.

It's such a shady business

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/salems_witch
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04
🚨︎ report
Interesting breakthroughs in plant-based diets!

Researchers have discovered that when mixed with spices found in popular Hispanic dishes, ground peanuts make a great meat substitute!

It's also been found that an offshoot of the banana family, when fried, makes an awesome faux-fish sandwich!

Craving a frozen treat, but can't handle dairy? Some have found that chilled grapes and prunes can hit that sweet spot in a healthy way!

Keep experimenting with cruelty-free ideas!

TL/DR:

If you like peanut-chiladas, and getting cod from plantains, if you're not into yogurt 'cause you have lactose pains, you could make a lovely delight with some prunes and some grapes. Here's the grub that you've looked for, get that meat off your plate!

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chadimus_Prime
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01
🚨︎ report
Treet plants with respect,

Or leaf them alone!

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WoozyDragon
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05
🚨︎ report
My christmas plant has lost it's leaves,

now it's a disapointsettia.

πŸ‘︎ 77
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jablothegreat
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2019
🚨︎ report
The pig plant?
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Supermr2
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17
🚨︎ report
What happens when you put a plant in a square?

It dies.

Why?
It loses its root

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/good_haircut
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the mathematician say when she turned into a plant?

Gee...ah'm a tree!!!

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Talon184
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09
🚨︎ report
My dad recently started his job at the sewage plant, and already busted a pipe and caused a flood.

His boss found out, and now he’s in deep shit.

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Xianthamist
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07
🚨︎ report
Three plants were fucking each other in the forest

They were having a treesome

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fakipo2
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Did I ever tell you about the girl that only ate plants?

I can't believe I never mentioned herbivore.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cavtrpr017
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2019
🚨︎ report
I used to hate fast growing plants

But then it grew on me.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/xJammy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the Panda stealing all those plants?

She was a real bamboozler...

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jedi_Lucky
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2019
🚨︎ report
Why do plants hate math?

It gives them square roots

πŸ‘︎ 92
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πŸ‘€︎ u/marinatedpotato
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Why the hell anyone would make a plant based burger is beyond

meat

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ldb477
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2019
🚨︎ report
So a man walked up to me and placed some soil, plant seeds and fertilizer on my head.

It was annoying at first, but I think it grew on me!

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MrEpicGamerMan
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2019
🚨︎ report
Potted Plants
πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/UnholyPotatoes
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s a Kardashian’s favorite kind of plant?

A transplant

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KirkCaballero
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2019
🚨︎ report
I accidentally trimmed the leaves off my wife's favorite plant, but fortunately they grew back.

That was a releaf.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Happy_Each_Day
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Blueberry bushes are one of the least productive plants.

All their effort bears little fruit.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/celbruk
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2019
🚨︎ report
A woman in my town's hamburger plant backed into a meat grinder.

Disaster.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2019
🚨︎ report
Me to My kid: "I heard you've been planting trees, son! Why don't you plant Tulips?.."

Nvm, not from Alabama

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cracksniffer666
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you give a plant when its hurt

A cloroplast-er

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/shrek-hentai-69
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2019
🚨︎ report
what happened to the plant that was in the math classroom?

It grew square roots

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/abdic8
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call an enemy plant?

Foeliage.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/zspratt
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2019
🚨︎ report
What part of the brain deals with knowledge about plants?

The treefrontal cortex.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Nubsnivel
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2019
🚨︎ report
When a plant is getting it’s picture taken...

It’s called a photo-shoot.

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ScribleSean
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Sometimes plants make better friends than people..

At least they know how to photo-sympathize.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ditzdee
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Face plant
πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/trex-19
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2018
🚨︎ report
You can’t plant flowers if

You haven’t Botany

πŸ‘︎ 33
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NicJ20
πŸ“…︎ May 16
🚨︎ report
You Can’t Plant Flowers...

...if you haven’t Botany

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PirateboarderLife
πŸ“…︎ May 12
🚨︎ report
Did I tell you about the girl who only eats plants?

You've probably never heard of herbivore

πŸ‘︎ 61
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DadofTamzin
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15
🚨︎ report
Why are so many plants transgendered?

Because plants have less stygma to stamen.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dyspaereunia
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2019
🚨︎ report
You can't plant flowers

If you haven't botany

πŸ‘︎ 43
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BassWizard420
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2019
🚨︎ report
You cant plant any flowers if you havent botany
πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HisNameIsJeffTris
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2019
🚨︎ report
You can’t plant any flowers if you haven’t botany
πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2019
🚨︎ report
You can't plant flowers if you haven't botany.
πŸ‘︎ 6k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/twofirstkinds
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2018
🚨︎ report

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