I’m really loving the tree puns people are posting
They’re just such lightwooded jokes but I understand that it doesn’t teaks everyone’s fancy. I’m running out of tree puns so I might have to branch off to other puns or spruce up my current ones
I'm trying to come up with a good tree pun
My dad told me to stop making tree puns.
But he's not the balsa me.
I wood like to say a tree pun,
but I am going to branch off to different jokes and leaf you alone.
So I’m trying to work on tree puns
I guess you can say I’m branching out and sprucing them up a bit. They’re oak-ay at the moment. But nothing that would leaf you hanging.
Don’t ask me for any tree puns.
Acacia haven’t noticed I’m all out.
I fernly beleaf my tree puns are qualitree, you can leaf me alone if you disagreen.
I used to hear alot of tree puns
Most of them were all bark and no bite, even though they branched out to more deep rooted subjects. Some of the saps had to leave usually. Everyone was oakay in the end though, it left some of us feeling fruity. I was asked how the others were affected, but i told them i wooden know. I bought a wooden tv shortly after but everything was payperview.
I saw a tree yesterday.
I didn't trust it, it seemed kinda shady.
What is green and fuzzy and if it falls out a tree it'll kill you?
Wife says I won’t get 5 upvotes for this, but... Did you hear the one about the dog and the tree?
They had a long conversation about bark.
Edit: Y'all are nuts! We're somewhere north of 10k upvotes now, so I'll direct any remaining attention to Boot Camp for New Dads.
I heard a cactus fell in love with a fruit tree.
They make a prickly pear.
saw a girl with a tattoo of a tree on her breast, seems like it would be painful...
My neighbour told me he was scared to plant an apple tree.
I told him to grow a pear.
What kind of tree is the best for blocking water?
Why did the branch fall off the tree?
It didn't want to stick around.
How many apples grow on a tree?
What sound does a tree make?
What's white and can't climb a tree?
I need to learn how to take care of my new tree
So I'm going to nursery school.
Have you ever seen an elephant hiding in a tree?
Exactly. Because they're damn good at it!
What did the cop say when he crashed his car in the tree?
That's gotta be the fastest time that we have arrived on the crime scene
Why did the tree take a nap?
Why should you never be in a relationship with a tree?
You'll regret it in autumn when it leaves
What do you call an isolated tree?
A friend of mine thinks he's an expert on tree types.
He refers to himself as a conifer
What did Edgar Allan Poe's friends say when he was about to crash into a tree?
A lumberjack was just about to chop down a tree when, miraculously, the tree said, "don't chop me down! I'm a talking tree!"
The lumberjack stepped back and said, "really? well, you'll die a log."
What do you call a tree that sucks blood?
My family tree is so messed up.
Yesterday I looked for it again and saw four dogs using it.
What did the dog say to the dogwood tree?
Nice bark!
From my 7yo this morning.
Remember, it is ok to hug a tree...
They are all bark and no bite.
What’s the best way to make a tree laugh?
Know why you never see an elephant hiding in a tree?
They're really good at it...
How do you cut down a tree?
You have to axe it first.
You don't want to get on a tree's bad side.
Would you like to reincarnate as a tree?
No, I don't think I wood.
A man is preparing to cut down a tree in the forest.
The tree says, "Wait! I'm a talking tree!"
The man replies, "You're going to dialogue."
I went to the garden center today and bought a Christmas Tree
The assistant asked me, “Will you be putting that up yourself?” I replied, “hell no, I’ll be putting it up in my living room.”
How many apples grow on a tree?
Why did the dog bark at the tree?
Because the tree barked first
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