Because the tree barked first
Because it's rough.
...but why do the stores sell so much ground cinnamon?
http://i.imgur.com/IN3Yz6C.png
My dad is a professional dad
They had a long conversation about bark.
Edit: Y'all are nuts! We're somewhere north of 10k upvotes now, so I'll direct any remaining attention to Boot Camp for New Dads.
A look of hopeful curiosity washed over her as she fell into my trap. "No, what?"
"Very SHADY things."
It must've reminded her that she had something else to do that was very important.
I was at work riding around with my coworker and buddy, he's married and already an old pervert at 29. We were driving down the interstate in traffic and looking at hot girls as we drive, we get into the far right lane, to where I have nothing but trees to my side. He says, "damn man that chick was hot" as a car passes by and I replied, "I ain't got any bitches but I've got a few birtches over here!" And cracked up. We work for a stump grinding company, this is an onion joke!
Put your ear up to a tree and listen for the bark!
What sound does a tree make?
It barks
The lumberjack grinned, “And you will dialogue!"
until I got fired for barking up the wrong tree.
I know because every time I cut one, I keep a log.
I asked my girlfriend what she thought trees would sound like if they talked while on a hike.
She said "I bet we couldn't understand them"
I said "why do you think that?"
She said "because they probably only bark"
She then laughed the next half mile down the trail barking occasionally and saying "shh, shh, do you hear that? Thats a tree talking in the distance"
Me: Is it feet?
She's never amused. It's usually a small pebble or a piece of tree bark or something.
But it turns out he was barking up the wrong tree
But he was always barking up the wrong tree
Do you know why redwood is the favorite tree species of every dog?
It has the thickest bark.
You’re barking up the wrong tree!
I was volunteering at a tree-identification event at a local park with about 15 people from work when I chimed in on the following exchange.
Leader: Alright, we've identified a couple of types of maplewood. Can anyone tell me what kind of tree THIS is? (points to a tree)
Someone: is it... it's a Dogwood?
Leader: Very good! Can anyone tell us how we know that it's a Dogwood?
Me: Because of its... bark.
Everyone: groans into laughter
I took a bow (or bough).
That wood work!
Our dog's barking her head off, trying to get food from the table. I look to my daughter and say: "Must be a tree-dog."
"A tree-dog," she says, "why's that?"
"Because of all the bark!"
And then I got that look. If you're a dad, too, you know the one.
He responded with "I guess that tree will have more bark than usual".
For reference, I live in Virginia. Our state tree is the dogwood.
"There's a lot of our state tree growing wild here."
"I hear that its bark is worse than its bite."
Dad: What did the dog say when he slid down the tree? Me: What? Dad: Rough, Bark!
Put your ear up to a tree and listen for the bark!
