A soup pun

I ordered a quart of matzoh ball soup from the restaurant across the street. They usually put two matzoh balls per order, but I asked if I could have a third. The guy on the phone said he'd try to fit the extra one in.

When I went to pick up the soup, I asked the guy if he was able to get the third one in the container, and he said "Yup, the ball's in your quart now".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BadCorey
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2014
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Why shouldn't you put more than 239 beans in a soup?

Because adding just one more would make it too farty. Straight from my 7 year old daughter.

Edit: Thank you so much for the awards and upvotes. I showed my daughter how many people saw and appreciated her humor and she's extatic. I know she probably didn't come up with the joke herself but this was one of the first times she really got me with a good one and I thought I'd share it with some fellow dads and others.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/oak05
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13
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Soup (I know it’s from Instagram but that’s why I kept the @ of the account in)
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shabdo_
πŸ“…︎ May 31
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What font do they use for the letter noodles in Alphabet Soup?

Times New Ramen

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PaleoGamer
πŸ“…︎ May 27
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Don’t you guys hate it when you have hare in your soup
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πŸ‘€︎ u/supdawggg00
πŸ“…︎ May 19
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What do you call someone who takes pictures of Vietnamese soup?

A pho-tographer

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ftaf
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25
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What do you call 1000kg of Chinese soup?

Wonton

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πŸ‘€︎ u/_3bi_
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28
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I’m ready to share my Grandma’s special Gold soup recipe: first you boil the water,

... then add 24 carrots

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PileOfThoughts
πŸ“…︎ May 26
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I combined vegetable and alphabet soups.

It solved my consonantpation and i had a vowel movement.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bykpoloplayer
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01
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What did Snoop Dawg say when he tried the soup in Saigan?

Pho shizzle!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18
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Why do the Irish always put 239 beans in their soup?

Because anymore would be too farty.

Happy St. Paddy's Day!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hallsguide
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16
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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Anyone can roast beef!

>!Not everyone can pea (pee) soup!!<

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πŸ‘€︎ u/physco219
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16
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My dad always said I loved alphabet soup growing up.

But really it was just him putting words in my mouth.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Texgymratdad
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27
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"Have you heard about the Asian chef that spilled soup?"

"Yes, he burned his Japaknees,"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/iamnothingtoo
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16
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I've decided to invest all my money in soup stocks

I want to be a bouillonaire.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/2ndbreakfastfan
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
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I was peacefully eating my Chinese soup, until a guy came out of nowhere and flipped the bowl, spilling my soup everywhere and ruining my meal.

This was an act of wonton destruction.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThePainTra1n96
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15
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I had a go at making soup for the family tonight

I had some great feedback, the kids even said it was souper good!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chacmaa
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19
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After eating alphabet soup....

....the next time I pooped I had a vowel movement. But I'm a bit worried that all the other letters still haven't come out. It's been a while now so I went to see my doctor. He said it wasn't a big deal. I was just a little consonantipated.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nyccfan
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06
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What do you call it when you mix a laxative with alphabet soup?

Letter rip

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gotblake
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06
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On what type of plate does Dracula get his blood soup served on?

On a plate-let

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Deadly_R
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06
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What do you call Japanese alphabet soup?

Ramen Numerals

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Diriector_Doc
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16
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You’ve heard of alphabet soup now get ready for....

Times new ramen!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dandan_56
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2020
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I tried to give the Uber Eats driver another tip for my Vietnamese soup.

He said to pho-get it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Naitraen
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25
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I lost my job at the salvation army soup kitchen last night.

All I said was hurry up some of us have homes to go to...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HazyDayZ420
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11
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Soup
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πŸ‘€︎ u/spinnaker190
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
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The Soup Dragon rules!
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πŸ‘€︎ u/orlanthi
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
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What’s a soup that makes you think a lot?

Stew.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dangergurl666
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
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What’s a Tauntaun’s favorite Chinese soup?

WaunTaun

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πŸ‘€︎ u/siphodeus
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
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What do you call a person who made a painting with soup?

Stewart

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πŸ‘€︎ u/presuire45
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2020
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Thin soup
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πŸ‘€︎ u/markrakosfalvy
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2020
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My 6 yr old son has an attitude problem at the dinner table. He barely eats and always makes the rudest comments about the home-cooked food we provide him, so tonight we tried alphabet soup.

I really hope he eats his words.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fordskis
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
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What do you call a soup factory run by strippers?

A brothel

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πŸ‘€︎ u/xkelsx1
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
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How much did the soup weigh?

Won ton.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/throwawaymaybeso
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
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I ate five cans of alphabet soup yesterday

And this morning I had a huge vowel movement.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
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Did you hear about this new soup that's highly in demand?

It's always out of stock

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πŸ‘€︎ u/almondjoyeee
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
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Have you heard that there are some people who are against Vietnamese soup?

anti-phở

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πŸ‘€︎ u/watercolorfiddle
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
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What does a duck put in it’s soup?

Quackers.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DismalSeagull
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2020
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The soup's gone bad.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mee-thee
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2020
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What do you call the biggest size of soup you can order in restaurants?

Souper size

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πŸ‘€︎ u/callmefinny
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
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Why is haunted soup the best?

Because it's soup eerier

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JCokeDaKilla
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
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Why was the soup in a good mood?

Because it felt super duper!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shotintheship
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
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I’ve combined alphabet soup with a laxative...

I call it LETTER RIP

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πŸ‘€︎ u/no1krampus
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03
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From my 8yr old: What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

You can roast beef, but you can’t pee soup!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Itsame_Daario
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2020
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I made a dish that combines alphabet soup with a laxative.

I call it Letter Rip.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MelkorHimself
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2020
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How many beans do you need to make the perfect bean soup?

239.

Because one more would be too farty.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Crash_86
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
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I've combined a laxative and alphabet soup.

I call it "Letter Rip."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sesh458
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2020
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What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Anyone can roast beef...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pratojr
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
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