Did you hear about the new tomato soup and crackers movie starring Tom Cruise?

It’s called Bisquey Ritzness

👍︎ 5
📅︎ Feb 05 2019
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Dad-joked by my uncle.

We were celebrating my vegetarian uncle's birthday out at Sweet Tomatoes, which is a salad buffet restaurant. They have other things too, like pastas, breads, and soups.

My uncle settles down at his table, and loudly remarks to my aunt:

Uncle: "You know, this place is great and all..."

Her: "Yeah? What's wrong?"

Uncle: "I don't know. By the time I get all my food together from the buffet line..."

Aunt: "...what?"

Uncle: "My salad gets cold!"

Groans were heard all around.

👍︎ 4
📅︎ Sep 10 2015
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