A ham sandwich walks into a bar and orders a beer

The bartender says we don't serve food here

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VVIIVVI
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2020
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Sandwich
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πŸ‘€︎ u/simone0300
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2020
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What's the coldest sandwich you can eat?

A brrrrrrger

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 06
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I cut myself making a sandwich today.

They don't call it sharp cheddar for no reason.

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2020
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TIFU by mixing up my coworkers' sandwich orders and not giving them what they requested.

Sorry, wrong sub.

πŸ‘︎ 19k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dinner_cat96
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2020
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What's a frog's favorite sandwich?

The McRibbit

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mettaton0H_YES
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2020
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Whats a horse's favorite sandwich condiment?

Mayo....cause mayo-neighs.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NewbieSniper
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2020
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I got banned for posting my sandwich on reddit

It was a sub-reddit

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jmar4234
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2020
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I want to open a sandwich shop called Salvador DelΓ­

We’ll specialize in melts.

πŸ‘︎ 73
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πŸ‘€︎ u/IceCoolBrutus
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
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I see McDonald's has brought frogs' favorite sandwich back.

The McRibbit.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GatorScribe
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2020
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Is a hot dog a sub or a sandwich?

It’s just a hot dog. No bun intended.

Posted at r/jokes but someone told me to post here. Guess I’m officially old.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/treflipallday
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2020
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Hamon Cheese sandwich (Made by me)
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PlushPowerGaming
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2020
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What’s the most popular sandwich shop in Warioland?

Wawawa

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πŸ‘€︎ u/natelopez53
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2020
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My four-year-old son just asked me for a peanut butter and farts sandwich...

AKA "a peanut butter and smelly."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kamasushi
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
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I bought a chicken to make a sandwich

Turns out it just poops all over the floor and doesn't make sandwiches

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Not_obnoxious
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2020
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I bought a chicken to make a sandwich

It didn’t work

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
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I asked my wife to make me a sandwich

She said, "Poof you're a sandwich"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2020
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What do you call a mediocre sandwich?

Subpar

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mikeychowen
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2020
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A sandwich walks into a bar and orders a drink

The bartender says β€œSorry we don’t serve food here.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/adrianorivera
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
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I decided to open a sandwich shop in the middle of our residential district...

It'll be called Suburbway.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
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A Ham Sandwich Walks Into A Bar

The bartender says "Sorry, we don't serve food here."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LavaWolf800
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2020
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Why does McDonalds not have a steak sandwich on the menu?

Because it would be a McSteak

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JDTaiwan23
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
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If a movie company filmed a sandwich.

If a movie company was filming a sandwich but instead of using bread they used a tortilla. Would they call it a wrap and not get any filming done at all?

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2020
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Which Witch is a Sandwich
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gingernuts13
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2019
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KID: "Dad, make me a sandwich!"

DAD: "Poof, you’re a sandwich!”

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sleeteater
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
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An beautiful woman orders a turkey sandwich at a deli, with pickles on the side. The guy behind the counter looks at her and says, "You like big pickles?" and winks. As he slides her a pastrami sandwich she looks at him, smiles, licks her lips and says

Wait, wrong sub.

πŸ‘︎ 670
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πŸ‘€︎ u/baconaboot
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2020
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His favourite sandwich is Lettuce Guacamole Bacon Tomatoe
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ni_ko_98
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2020
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What’s dads favorite sandwich?

This sub

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/paisleywinda
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2020
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A sandwich is a compromise

Meat in the middle

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πŸ‘€︎ u/whatastupidpunt
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2020
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What’s the loudest kind of sandwich?

a B. yell T.

Surely it’s been done before, but it just popped into my head and it made me feel silly.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LaChuteQuiMarche
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2020
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Yesterday my girlfriend and I went to a new(ish) sandwich shop for dinner, close to where she grew up.

Her: This building didn’t used to be here.

Me: Every building didn’t used to be there!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Show-Tune-Singer
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2020
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I was making a sandwich and all of a sudden it flew away

I guess my butterflies

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Princellalaland
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2020
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I went into a diner the other day and said to the waitress, "I'll have a rubber band sandwich".

"And make it snappy."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zinny08
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2020
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If given a choice of eating a sandwich in the park or watching the Nickelodeon Network all day, what would you do?

I would pick Nick.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2020
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After my director friend finished shooting his scene, I handed him a sandwich.

I said, β€œThat’s a wrap.”

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2020
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Son says to dad: β€˜Dad make me a sandwich’

Dad goes: β€˜poof, you’re a sandwich’

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/klatkasalowa5
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2020
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Go make me a rubber sandwich

And make it snappy

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Stewinator
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2020
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What do you call a sandwich that's eaten while driving on a highway?

Autobahn mi

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dancunn
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2020
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If you want the best Sandwich Deal there is…

Go to Kent. You'll find both of those there.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2020
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I tried to share a sandwich with a homeless guy today.

He said, "Fuck off. Get your own!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sexxc
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2020
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The other day I saw a ghost. It asked me for a sandwich.

I gave it a boo-logna sandwich.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/UnusualPete
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2020
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I asked my dad why he made me a glowing sandwich

he said: "I thought you wanted a light snack?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Waterburst789
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2020
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What do you get when you eat a peanut butter & baked bean sandwich?

A fart that sticks to the roof of your butt.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bad11ama
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2020
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What is a vampires least favorite sandwich?

>!Hamon Cheese!<

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Weslovebacon04
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2020
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I told my friend I was making the world’s biggest sandwich.

He said β€œThat’s a bunch of bologna!”

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2020
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TIFU by ordering a Roast Beef instead of a Chicken Teriyaki sandwich.

Oops, wrong sub.

πŸ‘︎ 189
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Allgen
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2019
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A ham sandwich walks into a bar and orders a beer.

The bartender says " sorry, we don't serve food here!"

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LordAlgor7
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2020
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KID : "DAD , make me a sandwich".

DAD : "poof , you are now a sandwich"

πŸ‘︎ 33
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πŸ‘€︎ u/unesb
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2020
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