This helps weed out the weak.
Craig David has volunteered to help out at the next Olympics, he has been assigned to Archery...
He said “He’s delighted to be the bo selecta”
Need help figuring out a pun
My work uses punny names for all its example scenarios. Things like Dustin Dubree, Dora Jarr, Duane Pipes, etc.
One of them is David Jochim and no one in my class of 7 can figure this out.
So it’s either not a pun, or we’re dense.
My pen ran out of ink and an ink fairy in the shape of a squid appeared. He said if I let him eat my dinner of shrimp he'd help me out by giving me some ink. The deal smelled kind of fishy, but I needed to finish my homework.
So we did it squid pro quo
Had to help the guy out
Me: do you have any penguins?
Zookeeper: no, we dont have any penguins
Me: slides him 20 How about now?
Zookeeper: where did you get 20 penguins?
Need some good puns when I whip this bad boy out on the course today. Help me out you geniuses!
I just found out that Mercedes is donating state of the art street sweepers to some of the largest cities around the world to help fight littering.
They’re calling it Mercedes-clenz
I asked the shop owner if he could help me out
He said 'sure, which way did you come in'
What happens when a chair and a table helps out those in need?
I need help from all the dads out there...
You are tasked with making an advertisement for an amusement park, however you want to make it to STOP people from coming to the carnival... I'm curious to see your advertisements, also try to keep the jokes under 50 words.
Recently I took my family on a road trip, and we got a flat tire. When my daughter got out of the car to help, she almost got hit by a car.
Good thing she wasn't, that trip would've been short-lived.
I needed help to lease out a math textbook.
My wife asked, “Wanna come with me to help pick out some vinyl wood blinds?”
Ok guys. Time to rally together to help a fellow new dad out. I’m MCing a wedding and need the worst of the worst wedding themed dad jokes you have to offer.
Sorry I’m advance if this isn’t allowed.
My nephew said he was trying to help out when he spilled a bucket of water from the hole in the ground...
Scorpios will help you out in a pinch ♏️
Drinking coffee out of a lens mug helps me to focus...
My herbs were looking a little scuffed, but when I went to go polish them, my friend was already getting ready to help me out. This made me upset, so I grabbed a sprig out of their hands and said
This is my thyme to shine
In a radio contest for a new fence. Need a clever caption. Help me out??
Can someone help me out with a name pun with the name Nina and Olivia? (Separate) thanks.
I would love to help you out, but...
I don't know which way you came in.
I was trying to get help for my mental health issues, but the guy helping me turned out to be completely crazy
He was a psycho therapist
My wife said if I don't help out I'm going to see something. She was right.
After 3 days I could see out of my left eye again.
Dear punners, my biology class has to decorate our door. We will make a bunch of snowglobes out of petri dishes. But i need Pun! Help?
Guys help my laptop is completely out of control, what should I do??
Going out on a limb here, hoping this wood help with rekindling our relationship.
So I walked into doctor’s office and said “Doc can you help me out ?“
He said “Sure, which way did you come in?”
I met someone who helps old people get out of their chairs
Help, music is coming out of the printer
I think it’s jamming again
There’s a new Apple device that’s out to help teens cope with Dad jokes.
Its called the iRoll with a companion download for adults called the Groan app.
He came out as bi to his religious mother. She went to the Fish and Wildlife Service to ask for help.
She didn't know how to handle a bison
Can anyone help me out? I was caught stealing hearing aids...
And given the deaf penalty
A buddy of minp e said he would help me out on some repairs to a house.
He asked to borrow my cordless drill.When I handed it to him I said,"be gentle with him."He said"I will" I said,"I wasn't talking to you."
Can you help Dad figure out where he lost his hat?
It’s a real head-scratcher.
I was going to receive a promotion at work soon so I bought the book "What to Expect When You're Expecting" to help me find out what to expect.
It turns out that the book was not what I expected at all.
A man filling his car with gas, got some gas on his arm. He got in his car and lit a cigarette lighting his arm on fire. He flails around and other patrons help him put it out, just then 2 cops roll up...
They arrest him for waving a fire arm.
Eyelashes are supposed to help keep things out of your eyes
Yet, when I usually get something in my eye, it’s an eyelash.
How eyeronic..
I asked my wife to help me pick out some new music on Spotify.
She gave me some sound advice.
Whenever a situation presents itself, I like to help out...
Which way did you come in?
Help ! I am running out of bomb puns ! Details inside.
So, me and my group of friends recently started a gag going on one of our friends. She rolls with it, so it's okay.
So we just mess around with puns like "You're the bomb", "You've got an explosive personality", any bomb or explosion reference/pun we can make when talking with her or about her basically.
However, we are running out of puns.
Anyone got suggestions ?
Need a pun about flight by tomorrow, can you guys help me out, or am I just going to have to wing it?
Help me out with my pun!
I'm working on a great pun but I can't figure out how to finish it, and I haven't had enough sleep (night shift).
"When parting, instead of adios, I'm going to start saying asiago. Yeah I know it's cheesy but..."
Anyone got any good finishers?
[request] help a guy out with some cake or dessert themed puns
We both bake and I could use some help cooking up a sweet promposal for my date.
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