A list of puns related to "Flirt With"
You use acute angle. However, I'm probably just being obtuse.
Just Slytherin' to their DMs.
Say: "You're very attractive."
Me (Mr. Nerdy Smooth): You know you're less than 90 degrees?
Popular Girl: Because I'm acute?
It was at that moment I knew I had to marry her. We'll be married 11 years next month. :)
“Because she has no taste.”
Dave reads her leaving note and thinks, "Great",
" I can see Deidre now Lorraine has gone."
But she just kept saying I had too much baggage.
“Hmmm! She’s trying to pull a fast one” I thought
She walked up to him and said this isn’t working out.
These hoes ain't loyal
I don’t think she appreciated being Mac’d on...
Me: What turns you on?
Her: Spontaneity.
Me: So if I spontaneously combusted that would just be like the hottest thing you've ever seen.
Her: sighs
Guess that’s why it’s called a Court room
You are being Sejuiced
I had eight texts this morning saying 'Hello HNY!'
"This is my partner here," she told me, tapping him on the shoulder.
He turned around and I said, "Nice to meet you, Here."
I mean, it could be real but maybe that’s just fishful winking.
... and stumbled across a naked woman. She started flirting with me, so I asked her if she was game.
She replied yes, so I shot her.
Why was the fraction apprehensive about marrying the decimal? Because he would have to convert.
Why do plants hate math? It gives them square roots.
Why did the student get upset when his teacher called him average? It was a mean thing to say!
Why was the math book depressed? It had a lot of problems.
Why is the obtuse triangle always so frustrated? Because it is never right.
Why can you never trust a math teacher holding graphing paper? He must be plotting something.
Why was the equal sign so humble? Because she knew she wasn’t greater than or less than anyone else.
What do you call the number 7 and the number 3 when they go out on a date? The odd couple
What do you call a number that can’t stay in one place? A Roamin’ numeral.
Did you hear the one about the statistician? Probably.
What do you call dudes who love math? Algebros.
I’ll do algebra, I’ll do trig. I’ll even do statistics. But graphing is where I draw the line!
Why should you never talk to Pi? Because she’ll go on and on and on forever.
Why are parallel lines so tragic if they have so much in common? It’s a shame they’ll never meet.
Are monsters good at math? Not unless you Count Dracula.
What’s the best way to flirt with a math teacher? Use acute angle.
Did you hear about the mathematician who is afraid of negative numbers? They’d stop at nothing to avoid them.
How do you stay warm in any room? Just huddle in the corner, where it’s always 90 degrees.
Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven eight ("ate") nine!
Why DID seven eat nine? Because you’re supposed to eat 3 squared meals a day!
Why does nobody talk to circles? Because there is no point.
...he has a drink, flirts, then vanishes, with a poof.
^(I’m gay and personally found this hilarious, but many do still view the term “poof” as somewhat offensive, so my apologies if this isn’t in good taste.)
I work as a bartender at a classy cheese and wine bar in the DC area. Last night after some harmless flirting with some middle aged ladies, one exclaimed, "Sauvignon Blanc! That's my white jam!"
I replied, "Ma'am that's actually a wine, not a jam."
My wife and I are at the winery with my parents and the guy pouring samples is just flirting with all of the women, including my mom and wife, and telling dirty jokes, which is no big deal, but I don't really appreciate him calling wine "panty dropper" when he pours it for my mom. That kind of weird stuff, y'know?
Then he tells a story that he has an identical twin brother, and when they were infants, people would always ask his mother how she tells the two of them apart.
"I can tell them apart by their balls,"
And we're all like, "Jesus, enough with the gross out humor already," but he finishes the joke; "One of the babies bawls all day, the other bawls all night,"
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