I went to play station 5
They were bored out of their gourd.
That's what I do when I get board...
I have two favorite titles that are extremely clever puns.
“Shawn the Sheep” “Dexter”
“Shawn the Sheep” is a sly play on the dialect of the characters in the animation. “Shawn” and “shorn” have the same pronunciation in the dialect of the outskirts of Bristol, UK.
“Dexter” is a wonderful Latin pun. “Dexter” is the word for “right” and “Sinister” is the implied compliment, the word for “left” in Latin. Dexter is a series about a serial killer who only murders those guilty of crimes. His name in Latin implies he is the opposite of sinister, right or just.
He’d walk from one area to the next, telling stories and jokes which built upon each other. Week after week, he kept the line workers entertained with his complex jokes. One day, he was fired when he forgot the hole punch line.
It was quite the shindig
Papa, "What colour is it?"
3 yr old, "Blue."
Papa, "Where did you see it last?"
3 yr old: "In my hand."
It's going tits up.
A number of years ago I was in a rock band. We were hugely successful, playing some of the biggest venues and entertaining swarms of fans.
The last shoes we ever played were on our world tour. We played the Americas and then flew over to Europe. We played our way through Russia and even a couple of gigs in China, before selling out our final show in Japan.
It was a hell of a Journey, but it was time for me to hang up my guitar. I retired from the rock star life and got an office job in Tokyo.
I made a few friends at work, and grew close with one in particular, Narada-san. One day Narada had the day off for a funeral, but that wasn't enough; he needed more time. He was torn between his obligation to return to work and his desire to have more time at home. He asked me what he should do.
The answer was simple. I picked up my guitar and played a Japanese version of our biggest hit from 1981:
Don't Stop Bereaving
But upon further consideration he was gladiator.
but were created for educational porpoises.
She said “what are you doing? What is that noise?” I said “I’ve been screwing around behind your back.” She whipped around in shock and saw me, screwdriver in hand, screwing in the outlet cover.
I found it way more entertaining then she did.
I can't wait to put E.I.E.I.O. on my resume!
They do their best to navigate that maize.
My whole life I’ve been making sure it didn’t leave.
To antagonize a local QT and mess with their registers. That way I can get a snack, wait in line and every five minutes say, punctually, "Man, this quick trip is taking a long time."
It'll be my entertainment for an afternoon.
Arrrrr rated films.
1: it has to be a CompSci engineer, judging by the brain’s complexity
2: you’re wrong, it was a Mechanics engineer, look at the muscle and skeleton systems working as one
3: you’re both wrong, it was an Urban Planner, otherwise waste and entertainment areas wouldn’t be adjacent.
No more clowning around
This joke and an anti vaxxer.
i said BET
A sauce of endless entertainment.
But James May
Why is corn the best audience?
They are all ears.
*elevator music intensifies
I Binged and purged.
She said, "What's Toy Story 4?"
"Entertainment," I replied.
If you ever end up having to entertain kids around kindergarten age (5 or 6 years old) here are some jokes you can use.
Write the letter Y on a board or piece of paper. Ask, "Can you tell me what this letter is?" and they'll say "Y", to which you respond, "Because I want to know how smart you are."
After a bit of back and forth you can look exasperated that they don't get it (when of course it is you who don't get it), then say, "Okay here's an easy one, can you tell me what this word is?" Write down the word NO and of course the kids will say "NO" and you can say, "You don't know what this word is?" or "You know what it is but you won't tell me?" Kids usually think it's hilarious that an adult can be this dense.
For kids who can spell words, you can use ones like "duck" and then when they say it you can duck as if something is coming at you.
..and I said "this is Strange.."