Doctor pun
π︎ 70
π
︎ Aug 29 2020
her name is Carly and shes a doctor (pun idea)
man I should C A Rly good doctor
π︎ 2
π
︎ Sep 21 2019
In surgery my doctor said, "So what do we have here?" I replied that I broke my arm in 12 places."
He replied, "Well, stop going to those places then!"
π︎ 9k
π
︎ May 08 2021
Doctor: I think your DNA is backwards.
π︎ 8k
π
︎ Apr 09 2021
What did the Doctor say to the constipated detective?
π︎ 8k
π
︎ Apr 06 2021
which doctor? π€
π︎ 5k
π
︎ Apr 07 2021
What kind of doctor is Dr. Pepper?
π︎ 319
π
︎ May 11 2021
Did you here about the doctor who messed up the circumcision?
π︎ 90
π
︎ May 14 2021
The doctor told me my DNA is inverted.
π︎ 128
π
︎ May 10 2021
So the doctor came in to ask me about my broken arm. He said, "will painkillers help?"
π︎ 142
π
︎ May 18 2021
Patient: Doctor Doctor I'm blind!
Doctor: I see
Patient: Well no need to rub it in.
π︎ 48
π
︎ Jun 01 2021
When my doctor told me my plastic surgery was free of charge
The look on my face was priceless
π︎ 61
π
︎ May 06 2021
My doctor told me I'm going deaf.
The news was hard for me to hear.
π︎ 45
π
︎ May 24 2021
Why did the snake go to the doctor?
He had a frog in his throat.
π︎ 7
π
︎ May 30 2021
A man rushed into a Doctor's surgery, shouting ' help me please, I'm shrinking ' The Doctor calmly said ' now settle down a bit '..
..' you'll just have to learn to be a little patient '
π︎ 561
π
︎ Apr 16 2021
Doctor told me my insurance doesn't cover Viagra, but he can prescribe me the generic.....
π︎ 69
π
︎ May 07 2021
Doctor: Sorry sir but your body has ran out of Magnesium
π︎ 170
π
︎ Mar 30 2021
I tried to talk to my doctor about circumcision
He just talked in circles
π︎ 2
π
︎ May 22 2021
What do both doctors and bartenders have in common?
π︎ 11
π
︎ May 25 2021
Anyone else notice that when you REALLY need an eye doctor they are hard to see?
π︎ 9
π
︎ Apr 26 2021
I am at the waiting room of the doctorβs office, wondering when my girlfriendβs checkup will be over.
Sitting at the Doc of the Bae, wasting time.
π︎ 37
π
︎ May 06 2021
Bridesmaid Proposal Puns for a Doctor and a Lawyer?
I am asking two of my girlfriends to be my bridesmaids and wanted to word the question in a punny way related to their careers- one is a first-year medical resident and the other is a law student. I would like to flatter them/make it funny. Any and all ideas are appreciated!! If there is a better sub to ask this question please let me know:))
π︎ 3
π
︎ May 04 2021
The doctor told me I was sick. I asked him if he had the cure.
He told me that he was more of a Rolling Stones guy.
π︎ 15
π
︎ May 30 2021
My doctor friend is addicted to hitting his patients on the knees to test their reflexes.
He really gets a kick out of it.
π︎ 189
π
︎ Apr 12 2021
does anyone know if a doctor can take some of my butt flesh and graft it onto someone who isn't a relative?
π︎ 41
π
︎ Apr 28 2021
Whatβs a doctor who studies adamβs apples called?
π︎ 13
π
︎ May 26 2021
A woman goes to her doctor. He says: βHavenβt seen you in a long timeβ
She says: βThatβs because I was sickβ.
π︎ 8
π
︎ May 31 2021
My doctor says that when you die, your pupils are the last thing to go.
π︎ 1k
π
︎ Feb 18 2021
Why do short-tempered doctors always go out of business?
They don't have any patients.
π︎ 34
π
︎ May 20 2021
Went to the doctor because I got a strawberry stuck in my ear
He gave me some cream for it
π︎ 5
π
︎ May 22 2021
What kind of doctor checks ghost poo?
π︎ 11
π
︎ May 25 2021
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
π︎ 30
π
︎ Apr 21 2021
Doctor to patient do you smoke?
Patient: yes.
Doctor: marijuana, cigarettes, cigars, Vapes?
Patient: mostly brisket, and pork.
π︎ 11k
π
︎ Dec 04 2020
A guy goes to his doctor because he can see into the future.
The doctor asks him, "How long have you suffered from that condition?" The guy tells him, "Since next Monday."
π︎ 16
π
︎ May 20 2021
Doctor: "Relax David, It's just a small surgery. Don't panic!!"
Me: "But my name isn't David."
Doctor: "I know, I'm David."
π︎ 995
π
︎ Mar 01 2021
Doctor- Your body is completely out of magnesium.
Patient- OMG!
Doctor- Exactly
π︎ 12
π
︎ Apr 30 2021
Watson is the most famous doctor in the world
π︎ 31
π
︎ Apr 09 2021
My dentist looks like my eye doctor
π︎ 45
π
︎ Mar 30 2021
Went to the doctor and he used the defibrilator on me!
π︎ 9
π
︎ May 21 2021
My doctor is such a great guy. He always showers me with compliments.
Just the other day, he told me I have acute tonsillitis
π︎ 19
π
︎ May 15 2021
So it turns out Dr. Pepper isn't a real medical doctor...
He has a doctorate in theoretical fizz-ics
π︎ 6
π
︎ May 22 2021
My dad was born with a conjoined twin, but the doctors managed to separate them at birth.
I have an uncle, once removed.
π︎ 70
π
︎ Apr 02 2021
My doctor said that I had multiple personalities...
But, we don't believe him.
π︎ 11
π
︎ May 14 2021
What do you call a native Alaskan eye doctor??
An Optical Aleutian
Iβll see myself out...
π︎ 10k
π
︎ Dec 01 2020
I went in for a Covid test and my doctor asked if I had a sudden loss of taste
"No, I always dress like this", I replied.
π︎ 1k
π
︎ Feb 02 2021
My doctor told me I'm going deaf.
The news was hard for me to hear.
π︎ 8k
π
︎ Jan 24 2021
If Watson isn't the most famous doctor in the world...
π︎ 32
π
︎ Apr 09 2021
Doctor to Patient do you smoke?
Patient: yes
Doctor: marijuana, cigarettes, cigars, Vapes?
Patient: mostly brisket, and pork.
π︎ 87
π
︎ Apr 21 2021
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.