My wife is kicking me out because she's fed up with my South American animal puns...

'OK,' I said, 'Alpaca my bags.'

πŸ‘οΈŽ 75
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/the_houser
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Animal punning is my favourite.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/catsaresneaky
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 15 2021
🚨︎ report
My wife when I won't stop making animal puns.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/turboboob
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Animal puns πŸ‘Œ
πŸ‘οΈŽ 706
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Venrathim823
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Nothing like good old animal puns
πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JAWSco
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 31 2019
🚨︎ report
People get mad at me for always making marine animal puns.

I said, "Sorry, I don't do it on porpoise"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 22
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Subscribe_to_Sam24
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Just wanted to share this animal pun card I made. :)
πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/csunshiney
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Your Best Animal Puns!!!

Let's see what you can doe...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PaladinNerd
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 21 2012
🚨︎ report
My friend made a animal pun

It was terribull

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sulphurbrick
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 11 2016
🚨︎ report
Animals puns for wedding tables...

We're having a Canadian wedding with an animal theme to differentiate the different tables. On each table we'll have an animal emblem with some kind of love pun for each animal. It's been a trying affair to come up with these, but I know a lot of them could be better. In fact, most of them are downright ridiculous.

Reddit, how can we improve these?

Moose - I find you amoosing.

Beaver - I think I'll pick this flower for her, it would beavery romantic.

Owl - Owl always love you.

Fox - You are the object of my affoxtion.

Skunk - I stink you're sweet!

Bunny - Everybunny loves you!

Woodpecker - Knock Knock! Who's there? Wood! Wood who? Wood you be mine?

Porcupuine. I'm stuck on you.

Wolf - Wolf you marry me?

Trout - We'll be together trout eternity!

Turtle - You're turtley amazing.

Lynx - Let us lynx our lives together.

Bear - To be away from you is unbearable.

Squirrel - I'm going nuts for you!

Raven - Can't stop raven about you.

Turkey - I could just gobble you up!

Caribou - Where does one find a wedding ring for his deer? Why at the cariboutique, of course.

Deer - I love you deerly!

Goose - You give me goose bumps.

Sasquatch - Getting you to marry me was no small feat.

Also looking for some ideas for racoon, snake, and groundhogs.

show more
πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TonyMcConkey
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 06 2014
🚨︎ report
Animal Puns?

Toucan play that game

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pats5lyfe
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 01 2016
🚨︎ report
Great Animal Puns and Pun Pics puntenialtimes.com/animal…
πŸ‘οΈŽ 41
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/punwriter
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 30 2013
🚨︎ report
Yes a animal pun.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 63
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Msusparten130
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 23 2012
🚨︎ report
Which animal has the biggest breasts

A zebra

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10k
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Zeke_Smith
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 28 2020
🚨︎ report
You know what animal has the hardest life?

Dogs have it pretty ruff.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 20
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MoridinReborn
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 12 2021
🚨︎ report
What do call an animal that knows if you're lying?

Sealion

πŸ‘οΈŽ 220
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Passw0rdSUCKS
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 25 2020
🚨︎ report
my friend asked me what my favorite animal was and I said....

monkey, but I was lion

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/3ThatUserNameIsTaken
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 15 2021
🚨︎ report
I went to the zoo the other day but the only animal there was a dog.

It was a Shitzu.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RebellionRob75
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 30 2020
🚨︎ report
How did Noah fit 2 of every animal in a single boat ?

State-of-the-Ark technology

πŸ‘οΈŽ 32
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Amart1985
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 04 2020
🚨︎ report
A man walks into a zoo. The only animal in the entire zoo is a dog.

....

It was a shitzu.

EDIT: For those who say it's "stolen", i had no idea. A friend of mine told me this one yesterday and i just had to post it. That's it :)

πŸ‘οΈŽ 16k
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/gomass4
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Who always gets blamed for letting the farm animals out of their pens?

The escapegoat.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/cd1cj
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Are all large animal doctors obese?

Never mind, I'm just horsing around...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/numberthu
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 02 2021
🚨︎ report
What is the coolest animal?

Frogs, they eat Fly for breakfast.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 18
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jlr_102706
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Which animal runs all day and smells of pork?

A hamster.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SkyNetF1
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 01 2020
🚨︎ report
I think animal testing is a terrible idea...

They get all nervous and give the wrong answers.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 26
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 22 2020
🚨︎ report
What's a cow's favorite animal?

A mooooooose

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ShadeTreeMechanix
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Imagine being held at gunpoint by (bear with me) a literate animal, and the only hope of rescue is (BEAR WITH ME) posting a coded message on social media.

wHo the hEll would beLieve such a thing can hapPen.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13k
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SocialPerformer
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I really thought that animal was a horse, but then I asked it "Are you a horse?"

It said "Neigh"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/heridfel37
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 04 2020
🚨︎ report
My ex actually has 3 spirit animals:

Lion, Ass, Cheetah

πŸ‘οΈŽ 88
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/medimanager
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 11 2020
🚨︎ report
I went to an exotic petting zoo with Boy George. He wasn't at all impressed with their limited range of animals.

He started pointing them out to me.

"Llama, llama, llama, llama, llama, chameleon."

++++++++++++++++++

I thought of this today while driving and smacked my wheel as I giggled. My girlfriend stared at me, bemused and confused.

I like it. I'm proud of myself.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 93
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/zipflop
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 19 2020
🚨︎ report
My Roomba accidentally went outside our front door, and the neighbourhood animals immediately started attacking it.

Nature abhors a vacuum.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 27
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 06 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s America’s favorite animal ?

A desert eagle

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DudSteeple
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Whats the difference between a human and an animal?

You can legally put down one

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kingxjulian0
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 08 2020
🚨︎ report
I have a problem. My wife steals animals from the zoo and hides them in our house.

I tried to bring it up but she didn't want to discuss the elephant in the room.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/YDAQ
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 05 2020
🚨︎ report
What animals love to live in a sewer?

Turdles.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 34
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Professor_Arkansas
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 30 2020
🚨︎ report
My daughter keeps putting my golf visors on all of her stuffed animals

She told me they call her the queen advisor

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/justcurious-serious
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 02 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a milking animal and a mathematical device?

A Cowculator.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/potato_fish12
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
As a newly qualified vet, I'm now allowed to treat animals.

Yesterday, I took a herd of cows out for drinks.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 20 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call farm animals with a sense of humor?

A laughing stock!!!!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Spicoli0525
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 28 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a Scandinavian who does eat animal products?

Norvegan!

Edit: doesn't, not does. I'm a donkey

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/fred1840
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 17 2020
🚨︎ report
A sales guy tried to sell me on a new preparation to wash my hair with, which supposedly contains the excrements of some very special rainforest animal or whatever.

I think it was Scampoo.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/deceze
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 21 2020
🚨︎ report
I bought a pack of those animal shaped biscuits,

but had to take them back as the seal was broken...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/the_houser
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I saw a big animal during the safari. I think it was an elephant

but what do rhino.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Kartenhouse
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 03 2020
🚨︎ report
I asked my farmer friend, β€œCan you explain how I can gamble using farm animals?”

He said, β€œYou bet your ass.”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 01 2020
🚨︎ report
I can't bear animal puns
πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Michaelphelpsisquick
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 22 2017
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.